How has work treated you at time of need?
I have been dealing with this issue since Jan 2011
Denise
Comments
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work
Don't know what kind of job you have ... but I do know that I worked throughout my treatment (except for a few days for surgery) ... and everyone was wonderful. I mainly sit at a computer ... very little walking/lifting etc. Mostly administrative stuff I do at the computer.
Anyway ... I've always been open about what I was going through ... and the folks have been very patient and understanding. I had my lumpectomy on 1/21/09 ... and I still have chemo brain ... but everyone understands and is very used to me asking the same question 5 times ... :-)
It's just my opinion that the more open you are about what you are going through ... the better it is for those picking up the slack on things you can't do. Knowing you are going through treatment they probably want to help ... but don't know how. So it probably isn't an "inconvenience" for them to pitch in with what you can't do.
hugs.
teena0 -
I agree with Teena,tgf said:work
Don't know what kind of job you have ... but I do know that I worked throughout my treatment (except for a few days for surgery) ... and everyone was wonderful. I mainly sit at a computer ... very little walking/lifting etc. Mostly administrative stuff I do at the computer.
Anyway ... I've always been open about what I was going through ... and the folks have been very patient and understanding. I had my lumpectomy on 1/21/09 ... and I still have chemo brain ... but everyone understands and is very used to me asking the same question 5 times ... :-)
It's just my opinion that the more open you are about what you are going through ... the better it is for those picking up the slack on things you can't do. Knowing you are going through treatment they probably want to help ... but don't know how. So it probably isn't an "inconvenience" for them to pitch in with what you can't do.
hugs.
teena
My boss
I agree with Teena,
My boss is the most caring person on the planet, well okay maybe behind my husband David. Anyways I found at least from my experience that having it all out there in the open is the best approach. I keep him filled in on my Dr.s appointments and I'll even schedule my Rads around my lunch hour. Through my whole process I've missed 4 afternoon's due to chemo appointments and a week off from my bi-lateral surgery. I should state my job is cushy like Teena's and sit by a computer most of the time. Co-workers can be a different ballgame, but mine all know and support me. I guess if your a team player, a situation like this isn't going to change their feelings.
Good Luck,
Lorrie0 -
workbutterflylvr said:I agree with Teena,
My boss
I agree with Teena,
My boss is the most caring person on the planet, well okay maybe behind my husband David. Anyways I found at least from my experience that having it all out there in the open is the best approach. I keep him filled in on my Dr.s appointments and I'll even schedule my Rads around my lunch hour. Through my whole process I've missed 4 afternoon's due to chemo appointments and a week off from my bi-lateral surgery. I should state my job is cushy like Teena's and sit by a computer most of the time. Co-workers can be a different ballgame, but mine all know and support me. I guess if your a team player, a situation like this isn't going to change their feelings.
Good Luck,
Lorrie
My boss and coworkers were (are) absolutly cheery and supportive. I worked throughout this ordeal. I cut hours by going home early and taking off a week durning my crashes. I am a hairdresser so listening to everybodies nick picking about mondain stuff helped me realize that some of them have no clue what's in store for them.Evendently they have had no illnesses in there lives.0 -
Happy for you but not how it worked for me..sadlytgf said:work
Don't know what kind of job you have ... but I do know that I worked throughout my treatment (except for a few days for surgery) ... and everyone was wonderful. I mainly sit at a computer ... very little walking/lifting etc. Mostly administrative stuff I do at the computer.
Anyway ... I've always been open about what I was going through ... and the folks have been very patient and understanding. I had my lumpectomy on 1/21/09 ... and I still have chemo brain ... but everyone understands and is very used to me asking the same question 5 times ... :-)
It's just my opinion that the more open you are about what you are going through ... the better it is for those picking up the slack on things you can't do. Knowing you are going through treatment they probably want to help ... but don't know how. So it probably isn't an "inconvenience" for them to pitch in with what you can't do.
hugs.
teena
and now I must go through more and out long term 4 wks..due to side effects from cancer meds...during cancer I was told at the get go...DO what you need blah blah blah...and then turned complete 360....I have not told them yet surgery until I go to my dr monday and make finally arrangments (dates etc) asap I hope...IT is busy time for my coworkers-when I am out they must take turns (every hour it changes staff) covering me. But I can not put this off any longer due to busy or not good for work..(OR I would never get it done-I am the type to do things asap and get it over with) I was very open in past and got bit in the butt.
Thanks for imput-I wish i had your experince...! HAPPY for you...
Denise
I am receptionist and worked through radiation doing it on my lunch hours for 8 wks..0 -
wow..happ for you also Lorriebutterflylvr said:I agree with Teena,
My boss
I agree with Teena,
My boss is the most caring person on the planet, well okay maybe behind my husband David. Anyways I found at least from my experience that having it all out there in the open is the best approach. I keep him filled in on my Dr.s appointments and I'll even schedule my Rads around my lunch hour. Through my whole process I've missed 4 afternoon's due to chemo appointments and a week off from my bi-lateral surgery. I should state my job is cushy like Teena's and sit by a computer most of the time. Co-workers can be a different ballgame, but mine all know and support me. I guess if your a team player, a situation like this isn't going to change their feelings.
Good Luck,
Lorrie
at the start it was do what you must do...3 days into radiation I was called in the office and told as of tomorrow you must take sicks days..(MINE YOU my treatment was 60 mins including driving to and from and treatment itself)
I was told they couldn't justify paying someone to cover me and co workers were not willing to see at my desk for an hour to help me..
I will never get over that...! *(coworkers or boss)
Denise0 -
Sorry to hear this Denise,disneyfan2008 said:Happy for you but not how it worked for me..sadly
and now I must go through more and out long term 4 wks..due to side effects from cancer meds...during cancer I was told at the get go...DO what you need blah blah blah...and then turned complete 360....I have not told them yet surgery until I go to my dr monday and make finally arrangments (dates etc) asap I hope...IT is busy time for my coworkers-when I am out they must take turns (every hour it changes staff) covering me. But I can not put this off any longer due to busy or not good for work..(OR I would never get it done-I am the type to do things asap and get it over with) I was very open in past and got bit in the butt.
Thanks for imput-I wish i had your experince...! HAPPY for you...
Denise
I am receptionist and worked through radiation doing it on my lunch hours for 8 wks..
Sorry to hear this Denise, you have to do what's best for yourself. Nothing they can do once you get that Doctors excuse. I wish you luck my friend.
Lorrie0 -
contacted support groupbutterflylvr said:Sorry to hear this Denise,
Sorry to hear this Denise, you have to do what's best for yourself. Nothing they can do once you get that Doctors excuse. I wish you luck my friend.
Lorrie
I had gone after the fact of all they did wrong...now I know a bit more to protect myself. I even left a message to talk to someoneone (early today) just to get my ducks in a row. I hate being thrown off with supervisiors and I want a heads up what they must do or allow me to do. I expect them to tell me I can't have surgery until june or july since busy...!
I am more worried about talking to them work i'll be out 3-4 wks then talking to dr to set it all up and the PAIN...it's not right...but I have been through it..and much was done wrong...to me/ towards me..
Denise...
I just want to be prepared and knowledgable0 -
I am a Kindergarten teacher
I am a Kindergarten teacher in a public school. Since my diagnosis my school, including my principal, has totally rallied around me. I have been the recipient of gift cards to stores and restaurants, had my yard flocked by a co-worker, had friends offer to cover my class when I've had to leave early for appointments and been the recipient of a beautiful care basket filled with socks, candles, books, soda and gift cards. I know I am blessed. Not everyone has that support at work. I hope your work place will do no less.
Nancy0 -
self first
I am a teacher and the only thing I worried about was missing the kids. After my double mastectomy and then adjusting to arimidex, I was always tired. Honestly, my principal at that time was much more understanding and would let me take off, go home early, sit down and rest --cover my class personally if needed. She was awesome!! She said we were all like family.
This new principal, totally by the book. Which means I would have
more time missed from work; no coming in an hour late for bloodwork or a nausea attack, or an early doctor's appt. (take 1/2 day or entire day, no middle ground) and she has no observable compassion.
My philosophy for me, a teacher---if we can only miss a FEW minutes of class time teaching, that is so much better than having to miss 4 hours!!!!
Do what you have to do to take care of you!!!!0 -
My boss has been awesome.
My boss has been awesome. When I had a blood pressure (as in nearly hitting the floor woozy) problem on nights, she supported me 100%. She told my nurses that, if I felt woozy, they were to scrub in and assist. It really helped my morale just to know that I have support if I need it.
Luckily, this has not happened again. I've learned to really hydrate more when I work and to check with L&D before taking my blood pressure meds. So far, so good.
Just FYI, I have also had back surgery, a mild heart attack and a new diagnosis of bone mets since I started this job. You'd think that they'd be ready to dump me, but they have all been wonderful. On my part, I focus on my job when I am there--which is easy to do because I love it. But I am blessed in that I am physically able to work at this time.0 -
DeniseBioAdoptMom said:I am a Kindergarten teacher
I am a Kindergarten teacher in a public school. Since my diagnosis my school, including my principal, has totally rallied around me. I have been the recipient of gift cards to stores and restaurants, had my yard flocked by a co-worker, had friends offer to cover my class when I've had to leave early for appointments and been the recipient of a beautiful care basket filled with socks, candles, books, soda and gift cards. I know I am blessed. Not everyone has that support at work. I hope your work place will do no less.
Nancy
Denise,
I am very sorry that you have been going through. Please take care of yourself, your health is the most important thing in the world.
Knowing your history and lack of compassion at your workplace my advice to make everything very formal with minimum details. You probably need to file FMLA paper work. Plus your sick days and if you need short-term disability as well. If it would be me, not much talking, just you are having an emergency major surgery and a standard recovery for it 2 weeks? (ask your doctor). If you need more time for recovery your doctor will do a paperwork for you.
Wishing you good luck0 -
bumping up ....CypressCynthia said:My boss has been awesome.
My boss has been awesome. When I had a blood pressure (as in nearly hitting the floor woozy) problem on nights, she supported me 100%. She told my nurses that, if I felt woozy, they were to scrub in and assist. It really helped my morale just to know that I have support if I need it.
Luckily, this has not happened again. I've learned to really hydrate more when I work and to check with L&D before taking my blood pressure meds. So far, so good.
Just FYI, I have also had back surgery, a mild heart attack and a new diagnosis of bone mets since I started this job. You'd think that they'd be ready to dump me, but they have all been wonderful. On my part, I focus on my job when I am there--which is easy to do because I love it. But I am blessed in that I am physically able to work at this time.
bump0 -
note today from Dr for workCypressCynthia said:My boss has been awesome.
My boss has been awesome. When I had a blood pressure (as in nearly hitting the floor woozy) problem on nights, she supported me 100%. She told my nurses that, if I felt woozy, they were to scrub in and assist. It really helped my morale just to know that I have support if I need it.
Luckily, this has not happened again. I've learned to really hydrate more when I work and to check with L&D before taking my blood pressure meds. So far, so good.
Just FYI, I have also had back surgery, a mild heart attack and a new diagnosis of bone mets since I started this job. You'd think that they'd be ready to dump me, but they have all been wonderful. On my part, I focus on my job when I am there--which is easy to do because I love it. But I am blessed in that I am physically able to work at this time.
HE wrote I am need of urgent surgery..
THEY WILL still give me a hard time...bad timing since busy time at my job...but I MUST get this done...when the Dr says..and he fells urgent...
Denise0 -
Supportive..
My job has been supportive, thank God. I have a laptop that allows me to connect to our network and work from home when I need to.
Let me tell you though - YOUR HEALTH COMES FIRST, SECOND, then work. PLEASE take care of yourself. This is very important. My family always says, "if you are gone (don't want to say the word), your job will still be there". And this is true. They will find a way to cover for you, because they need to run the business. But I also suggest you do it ALL in writing, to cover yourself.
Good luck with everything Denise.0 -
Denise,LoveBabyJesus said:Supportive..
My job has been supportive, thank God. I have a laptop that allows me to connect to our network and work from home when I need to.
Let me tell you though - YOUR HEALTH COMES FIRST, SECOND, then work. PLEASE take care of yourself. This is very important. My family always says, "if you are gone (don't want to say the word), your job will still be there". And this is true. They will find a way to cover for you, because they need to run the business. But I also suggest you do it ALL in writing, to cover yourself.
Good luck with everything Denise.
I'm sorry that you
Denise,
I'm sorry that you are going through such a bad experience. Each workplace is different; bosses are different; co-workers are different. I agree with everyone who said that being open about the situation helps in several ways. It lets people know you are willing to talk about it, they get a better unsderstanding of what you're going through, and there is less avoidance of the issues and you because they just don't know how to respond. I sit at a computer most of the day, so it didn't miss much time with my lumpectomy and radiation, but missed 8 weeks with my bilateral mastectomy and DIEP reconstruction.
Joyce0 -
being open did not help in pastjk1952 said:Denise,
I'm sorry that you
Denise,
I'm sorry that you are going through such a bad experience. Each workplace is different; bosses are different; co-workers are different. I agree with everyone who said that being open about the situation helps in several ways. It lets people know you are willing to talk about it, they get a better unsderstanding of what you're going through, and there is less avoidance of the issues and you because they just don't know how to respond. I sit at a computer most of the day, so it didn't miss much time with my lumpectomy and radiation, but missed 8 weeks with my bilateral mastectomy and DIEP reconstruction.
Joyce
I was called in office said we can't justify paying someone to cover you for treatment..use sick days..
When my boss said I USED TOO many sick days in annual review when I cried...and said
YOU HAVE NO IDEA what I have been through she just changed it to her..saying on dont' be mad at me I DON"T like that..
very cold and all about her...she is very young (compared to me) and no health issues...I have note in hand to give when MY Dr office calls today to tell me my surgery date...I am the one who carries our health insurance...but my hubby can get if needed...
Denise0 -
it's officialdisneyfan2008 said:being open did not help in past
I was called in office said we can't justify paying someone to cover you for treatment..use sick days..
When my boss said I USED TOO many sick days in annual review when I cried...and said
YOU HAVE NO IDEA what I have been through she just changed it to her..saying on dont' be mad at me I DON"T like that..
very cold and all about her...she is very young (compared to me) and no health issues...I have note in hand to give when MY Dr office calls today to tell me my surgery date...I am the one who carries our health insurance...but my hubby can get if needed...
Denise
I told work...faxed my Dr note-rec'd call and said YOU do what you must...YOUR health is important...
sounds good right.? This is same line they told me with my BC...then changed tune 3 days in to radiation!
Denise0 -
I had kind of a similar experiencedisneyfan2008 said:it's official
I told work...faxed my Dr note-rec'd call and said YOU do what you must...YOUR health is important...
sounds good right.? This is same line they told me with my BC...then changed tune 3 days in to radiation!
Denise
Denise,
My experience has been somewhat similar to yours. My bosses/coworkers were very supportive of me in the beginning...telling me to take all the time I needed. But I think, as time wore on, and they saw how much time was needed, they didn't feel as supportive. Funny thing is, I have used my sick/personal/vacation time for all of this and I am doing rads on my lunch hour. I've actually overcompensated my time to them by coming in early and staying a little later when I am able to because I feel guilty about taking time. If I were you I would just make sure you document things and see someone who can give you advice in case they do change their minds and do something to you...particularly because you carry the health insurance. I would do that 'just in case' and for your piece of mind. Good Luck.0 -
I do most everything emailNJMom10 said:I had kind of a similar experience
Denise,
My experience has been somewhat similar to yours. My bosses/coworkers were very supportive of me in the beginning...telling me to take all the time I needed. But I think, as time wore on, and they saw how much time was needed, they didn't feel as supportive. Funny thing is, I have used my sick/personal/vacation time for all of this and I am doing rads on my lunch hour. I've actually overcompensated my time to them by coming in early and staying a little later when I am able to because I feel guilty about taking time. If I were you I would just make sure you document things and see someone who can give you advice in case they do change their minds and do something to you...particularly because you carry the health insurance. I would do that 'just in case' and for your piece of mind. Good Luck.
SO I have a copy...most times they will NOT reply in remail...for me to keep log. I do have file already started for this situation...dates , times..who I SPOKE To etc..and on my online calender...just in case..
Thanks..
Denise0
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