Apr 08, 2011 - 7:00 pm
I feel really lonely. My siblings aren't helping out at all. I take my dad to his oncologist, run errands and take care of his insurance claims. I am doing all the translating because he doesn't speak English. I am making sure he is clean, and his meals at the hospital are right.
I am missing a lot of work and fear that I may lose my job. I am worried about my own health and need to get a check up but I don't have time. I can't get sick. I can't lose my job because I need my insurance. I am at my wits end.
I am tired and angry and resentful and feel that everyone expects me to continue doing everything I was doing before my dad sick.
Sometimes, I want to hurt myself. I used to cut myself and lately that's all I want to do. No one asks me how I am doing or does anything nice for me. No one tries to cheer me up.
I know I am not alone, but I feel betrayed by my family and my friends.
I take care of myself and eat right and try and exercise and do things for myself but sometimes all I want is to talk to someone who sees my perspective and understands how I feel. Who understands how I carry so much of the burden.