Gathering the courage to post.

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pinkapples
pinkapples Member Posts: 54 Member
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Hi All,
I have been reading posts here since last summer, joined in Oct. 2010 but have only posted a few times. Seems I am afraid to post, I feel like so many have it worse than me, that my problems and concerns pale in comparison. I am on here all the time reading advice and sharing both tears and laughter. Joyus with every positive post and privately praying for each and everyone of you when the need arises.
I am a little afraid to talk about it as it seems to make it more real. Its funny but I've convinced myself that if I dont admit that sometimes I need support and dont say it outloud, then I must be doing ok!! I cant even post my picture. LOL
Truth is, I sometimes am not ok but I can't seem to let anyone around me know because I dont want them to worry.

Well, I think I have finally got the nerve to reach out, at least here, and admit that everything is not perfect :)

I had a bilat mast last March with tissue expanders (no flap) and am now in the final phase of reconstruction. My right "breast" seems to have fallen a little under my armpit. Has anyone had to have this fixed and should I expect good results or just deal with it? I have had so many disappointments that I really dont want to have any more unrealistic expectations. My PS says not to worry but I'm hoping for a real answer, not a canned one; so any experience you can share with me would be greatly appreciated. I know we are all different, just trying to get an idea of what some of you may have faced that is similar.

Deep breath....

My name is BillieJean

Eeek, the cloak is removed!!!!
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Comments

  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
    #2
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    Welcome....
    Welcome BillieJean. I'm glad that you have posted so that you can be properly welcomed!

    I did not have reconstruction, but many of the lovely ladies have, or are in the process of having it done. I'm sure you will hear from them, and what they experienced.

    Hugs,
    CR
  • aysemari
    aysemari Member Posts: 1,596 Member
    #3
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    EEEAAAK another kindred spirit ;)
    Hi BillieJean,

    I want to extend a warm welcome to you and tell you how glad
    I am you finally posted. So this way we can share in your joy and
    concerns.

    I had a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction. I got lucky mine
    came out really great. My surgeon took pictures of mine for his
    portfolio to show future clients.

    HOWEVER =), not so much luck with my nipples. Looks like I need
    to go back in for another surgery. And you know where I got the
    inspiration to do that? From here. Otherwise I may have let it go.
    But then I read this amazing sentence on here "Own your breast"!
    So I shall (:

    Hugs,
    Ayse
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #4
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    :-):-) :-)
    PEEK~A~BOO WE SEE YOU! :-D So glad you decided to come forward, no worry you have is too small to post we are here to be supportive of each other and welcome all in need so WELCOME!

    Now on to your question regarding the implant that is slipping, I have had a lumpectomy on the left side and a mastectomy on the right side. I had reconstruction surgery about 16 months ago, I still need to have the nipple recon. part done which is coming up. Anyway, my implant rolls towards the underarm whenever I lay down which I really do not care for. I went back to my surgeon several months ago and he informed me it was a good thing that I did wait this long to complain because there is a new product that he is using that will stop this from happening and correct the problem, he stated a year ago it would have been "I'll do the best I can to fix it" but now it is totally correctable. Mind you I have not had the corrective surgery done yet (I am scheduled for Feb. 18). So, I guess I am saying there is hope for you to get that fixed.

    So glad you joined us my new kindred spirit. Take care!

    RE
  • lizzie17
    lizzie17 Member Posts: 548
    #5
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    welcome!
    I am glad you have posted! Welcome to our Kindred Spirits.
    Every day I read the postings, but only respond sometimes. You will notice that
    some people are very good with words that are inspiring and offer courage when we
    are feeling low. I had a double mastectomy, but no reconstruction. I am sure you
    will get a lot of responses from people in a similar circumstance to yours.
  • Different Ballgame
    Different Ballgame Member Posts: 868
    #6
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    Welcome Billie Jean to CSN
    Dear Billie Jean,

    I am very happy to hear that you had the courage to post on this board. It gets easier every time you post.

    In the world of breast reconstruction is a word, namely REVISION. A revision means a surgery to correct something within the breast reconstruction. So Billie Jean, you need a REVISION to correct what is happening with your right breast. Ask your plastic surgeon if he can correct it. If he state that he can't correct it, find another plastic surgeon who can correct it.

    Good luck, Billie Jean. Be strong and be firm when you talk to your plastic surgeon.

    Lots of Hugs,
    Janelle
  • Different Ballgame
    Different Ballgame Member Posts: 868
    #7
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    Welcome Billie Jean to CSN
    Dear Billie Jean,

    I am very happy to hear that you had the courage to post on this board. It gets easier every time you post.

    In the world of breast reconstruction is a word, namely REVISION. A revision means a surgery to correct something within the breast reconstruction. So Billie Jean, you need a REVISION to correct what is happening with your right breast. Ask your plastic surgeon if he can correct it. If he state that he can't correct it, find another plastic surgeon who can correct it.

    Good luck, Billie Jean. Be strong and be firm when you talk to your plastic surgeon.

    Lots of Hugs,
    Janelle
  • CeeCee410
    CeeCee410 Member Posts: 19
    #8
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    I'm cyber shy myself. I
    I'm cyber shy myself. I rarely post. And pretty much for the same reasons as you. Seems there's always someone that has it much worse. And someone that is more eloquent than me. Plus, I'm a stubborn little booger...just hate admitting that I need help. And support.

    My reconstruction with TE's failed and it has been a huge disappointment for me. Now that I'm through with radiation, I'm trying to find a new plastic surgeon and will have to go with the surgery that uses the muscles in the back. It's never ending...

    I love that "Peek a boo, we see you!"
  • Dawne.Hope
    Dawne.Hope Member Posts: 823
    #9
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    welcome! :)
    Hi BillieJean,

    Thanks for posting. We need one another. I've found this journey to be a lonely road and only here can I find those who truly understand. So glad you finally posted! :)

    You still have the tissue expanders, correct? Those things are horrible. Mine were too far apart - I looked like I had oranges on my chest. They migrated over to my armpit. One was higher than the other. I looked like a freak. It was awful. All of that was corrected, however during the exchange. He did pretty extensive pocket work on the one side to make them symmetrical. It did hurt but the results are beautiful.

    They are out of my armpits, normally placed on my chest, they're symmetrical. The job of the TE's is to stretch muscle and skin. The whole process isn't a pretty one but it is effective. So, there is hope that all is well! :)

    Know that once you have your exchange it takes AT LEAST three months for the implants to settle in the pocket. Don't be discouraged at what you see right after surgery. 99% of us are disappointed right after the surgery. So, know you're not alone if that happens to you. We're here for you to support, encourage, listen every step of the way.

    *Breathe* :) It is going to be ok! :)
  • ladyg
    ladyg Member Posts: 1,577
    #10
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    Welcome BillieJean
    I only had a lumpectomy so I can not speak to your question. I just wanted to tell you that you have come to a great place. All of the pink sisters here help and support each other. You can feel free to ask any question, ask for some support or just vent if you need to. I have gotten a lot help here and I don't know how well I would have done without it.

    Hugs,
    Georgia
  • sea60
    sea60 Member Posts: 2,613
    #11
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    A warm welcome to you Billie Jean!!
    Everyone is different. I don't care to actually GO to a support group but felt the need to share. So when I found this wonderful site, I felt I finally found a way to communicate with others who have gone through this or are going through it now.

    We all need each other and it's amazing how one is surrounded by such love and care on this site. And I can soooo understand not wanting to worry family as I have the tendency to make everything look peach keen. But the fact is, we need to let this out. We need to vent, share, cry, laugh and bond with one another.

    I'm so glad you removed the cloak! Pease keep posting. And you too CeeCee :D

    I wish I could provide more advice on your particular situation but I'm sure others will.

    Hugs!

    Sylvia
  • Aortus
    Aortus Member Posts: 967
    #12
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    Welcome
    I love those Go Go Gophers!
  • jendrey
    jendrey Member Posts: 377
    #13
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    ...
    I had my TE exchange about a month ago and I, too, was concerned that the TE was too far under my armpit. I mentioned it to my PS and she said 'well we'll just have to fix that then.' And fix it she did!!!

    It was also way too high up but now that the implant is in place it's exactly where it should be. A little more projection would've been nice tho'... =)
  • dyaneb123
    dyaneb123 Member Posts: 950
    #14
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    jendrey said:

    ...
    I had my TE exchange about a month ago and I, too, was concerned that the TE was too far under my armpit. I mentioned it to my PS and she said 'well we'll just have to fix that then.' And fix it she did!!!

    It was also way too high up but now that the implant is in place it's exactly where it should be. A little more projection would've been nice tho'... =)

    Hey Billiejean! Welcome!
    I
    Hey Billiejean! Welcome!
    I often lurk in the background reading what's going on, but with little new to add to comments, it's ok, we are glad you found us.
    Depending on whether or not you need radiation, your implant can be fixed if you don't get a good result the first time. Radiation caused mine to form scar tissue, and harden and I just had it corrected. It was an easy proceedure and a better result. So, if you need rads, I would wait to see how it affects the tissue. If not, then your Plactic surgeon can fix any problems.
    Dee
  • Lighthouse_7
    Lighthouse_7 Member Posts: 1,566 Member
    #15
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    dyaneb123 said:

    Hey Billiejean! Welcome!
    I
    Hey Billiejean! Welcome!
    I often lurk in the background reading what's going on, but with little new to add to comments, it's ok, we are glad you found us.
    Depending on whether or not you need radiation, your implant can be fixed if you don't get a good result the first time. Radiation caused mine to form scar tissue, and harden and I just had it corrected. It was an easy proceedure and a better result. So, if you need rads, I would wait to see how it affects the tissue. If not, then your Plactic surgeon can fix any problems.
    Dee

    Welcome Billie Jean
    So glad you came out of your shell to join us! Sometimes I just read without posting also and it still helps so much.
    No thought is too small here and everyone will try to help or pray for you. It's a great bunch of ladies and gents.
    Can't help on your question, sorry, had lumpectomy, chemo and rads.
    Hugs,
    Wanda
  • PinkPearl
    PinkPearl Member Posts: 280
    #16
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    I love your post!
    I think we can all relate to removing the cloak. Just reading this site has helped me so much. I don't actually know anyone treating breast cancer right now so this has been my "secret support group". I can't contribute any info to you right now --I am behind you in the process but I will learn from you-- so keep joining in please.
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
    #17
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    lizzie17 said:

    welcome!
    I am glad you have posted! Welcome to our Kindred Spirits.
    Every day I read the postings, but only respond sometimes. You will notice that
    some people are very good with words that are inspiring and offer courage when we
    are feeling low. I had a double mastectomy, but no reconstruction. I am sure you
    will get a lot of responses from people in a similar circumstance to yours.

    Welcome Billie Jean. I had
    Welcome Billie Jean. I had a lumpectomy, but, wanted to be sure to say hi to you.


    Hugs, Kylez
  • Gabe N Abby Mom
    Gabe N Abby Mom Member Posts: 2,413
    #18
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    Some have it "worse" and
    Some have it "worse" and some have it "better"...but it's all the big ugly nasty hateful beast. And that really levels the playing field.

    I don't have any advice, my docs are advising against reconstruction for another year. But I'm glad you had the courage to reveal yourself and ask your question. And I hope it was painless, so we'll hear more from you.

    Hugs,

    Linda
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #19
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    Gabe N Abby Mom said:

    Some have it "worse" and
    Some have it "worse" and some have it "better"...but it's all the big ugly nasty hateful beast. And that really levels the playing field.

    I don't have any advice, my docs are advising against reconstruction for another year. But I'm glad you had the courage to reveal yourself and ask your question. And I hope it was painless, so we'll hear more from you.

    Hugs,

    Linda

    I live the "cloak" and "peek
    I live the "cloak" and "peek a boo" comment. Many lurk for a time and then they also fling off the cloak and leap in. As for feeling you have it easy, nothing is easy about a cancer diagnosis. Our stages, grades, and treatments vary but we are all dealing with cancer and the fear and questions are there. I did not have a mastectomy so I can't speak to reconstruction questions and I didn't have chemo. I did have a lumpectomy, radiation and am taking arimidex. Each lady here welcomes you and we will be here for advice, comfort, sharing and just being kindred spirits. I see that others that have done reconstruction are here so I am sure they will help answer those questions. I will keep you in my prayers that you never hear the word cancer again.
    Stef
  • Boppy_of_6
    Boppy_of_6 Member Posts: 1,138
    #20
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    fauxma said:

    I live the "cloak" and "peek
    I live the "cloak" and "peek a boo" comment. Many lurk for a time and then they also fling off the cloak and leap in. As for feeling you have it easy, nothing is easy about a cancer diagnosis. Our stages, grades, and treatments vary but we are all dealing with cancer and the fear and questions are there. I did not have a mastectomy so I can't speak to reconstruction questions and I didn't have chemo. I did have a lumpectomy, radiation and am taking arimidex. Each lady here welcomes you and we will be here for advice, comfort, sharing and just being kindred spirits. I see that others that have done reconstruction are here so I am sure they will help answer those questions. I will keep you in my prayers that you never hear the word cancer again.
    Stef

    Welcome Billie Jean
    I had a lumpectomy so I can't help much with that but I did want to welcome you. This board is great for support. I too tended to not really let people know how I was feeling so I understand that. God Bless
    (((Hugs))) Janice
  • mwallace1325
    mwallace1325 Member Posts: 806
    #21
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    Welcome
    Welcome BillieJean. I have no advice, I had a lumpectomy, but wanted to let you know you're welcome here any time, for any reason.

    marge

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