May 10, 2010 - 7:32 pm
Hello. Yesterday was the first Mother's Day without my mom and it was rough. I won't lie. We went down to my inlaws to spend the day with them which is nice since they are both in their 80's and we all know, we aren't going to live forever. We also went to the hospital to visit my BIL. He has Stage IV Esophageal cancer. He is terminal. Diagnosed last year, same day as my mom (Fri. the 13th) and he's already lived beyond prognosis. It's been almost 15 mos. They originally thought it was stomach cancer that had grown up into the Esoph. but now they've determined it started in the Esoph. No difference in prognosis though. He's had all the treatment he can have, chemo and radiation. Surgery wasn't an option because it's advanced and he has a pre-existing heart condition. They put a stent in but the cancer is growing up and thru the stent. He's been on a liquid diet for 2 mos now. It's just a matter of time. No cancer is a good cancer but this one seems particularly cruel. His wife, his siblings, his grown sons all seem to be handling it well. But it really tore me up inside yesterday seeing him, just being in the hospital in that ward. The ward for terminally ill people. The smell of disinfectant, seeing in a couple of rooms, bald, listless people hunched under covers. I hope we can all find the strength to get through the coming weeks. Thanks for listening.