My Moms Hairloss
Comments
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Dear Isabel
Lord knows I am not an authority but the best thing you can do is love each other and be there if your mother needs you for anything. She may not ask but you will need to offer to help her.
Just eating was the hardest thing for me during chemo. You all may have to prepare the meals during the week around chemo. Your mom may only be able to eat soft stuff like jello and broth and such. Give her whatever she can tollerate. Her taste buds will be off. So nothing is really going to taste right but she needs something to keep up her strength.
There are lots of things you can do with scarves and hats that will help your mother feel better about herself and the hair loss. I finished chemo on the 26th of Feb and will start rads soon. My hair is about 1/4 of an inch long and I cannot wait for it to grow. It is very traumatic when your hair falls out especially if it was long. I had mine cut short before I started chemo. It did make it a little easier when it all fell out. Remember the hair loss is only temporary. It is supposed to come back in thicker and curly. Cannot say that mine is coming in that way it is not long enough yet to tell. Check with your local American Cancer Society your mom may be able to get a wig through them free. When I don't need mine anymore I plan on donating them to ACS or the University of Miami.
You have found a great website full of loving and caring survivors that will help you understand what is going on with your mom and how you can help her get through all of this. Post often. We will always be here.
Sending you lots of cyber HUGS and prayers.
Donna
PS: Tell your mom about this site. Maybe we all can help and encourage her too.0 -
I'm sorry you are struggling....
But your mom sounds like a strong lady, and will prevail!
Yeah, it's a shock when a parent gets sicks...THEY are supposed to be INVINCIBLE!!!
But your mom knows she must go thru this to get on with her life, and you know it, too! Sure, bald is not the 'new' hair...but when it's over, your mom's hair will come back. Mine did, in full force!!!!!! I need a haircut every 6 weeks, or it's completely unmanagable!
My advice is to support your mom in her fight, which you are doing. You can be honest, if the stress gets too great, and tell her (hopefully without tears..she has enough on her plate without having to put a daughter back together...lol) calmly that you love her, and that you will do anything to help.
My daughter was my caregiver, and she was a rock! Both with the colon cancer, where I dropped 45 pounds and was in bed all the time, and 6 months later with the breast cancer. She now says that she was frightened, but didn't want me to see it, and so she talked to her dad (my ex) whenever things got too tough.
I agree with Donna, suggest she get on here, too!
Hugs from a mom, and a daughter (my mom has had cancer twice, too, just like me!),
Kathi0 -
Isabel.....
I know that both you and your Mom are both scared and sad. I'm afraid that to have thise feelings is sooo normal.
But you have each other and together, your Mom will get through her treatments and will come out the other side...and her hair will come back.
Until it does, get some cute hats and scarves for Mom and also contact your local ACS and make an appointment to get a wig. They are wonderful at ACS and will help your Mom feel better about herself.
My daughter...bless her...was by my side every step of my cancer treatment. All 14 months of it.
She got me to appointments and she held my hand through it all...I leaned on her and she was there for me.
Just be there for your Mom and you will both make it.
Hugs for you both!
CR0 -
It's ok to cry. I cried withCR1954 said:Isabel.....
I know that both you and your Mom are both scared and sad. I'm afraid that to have thise feelings is sooo normal.
But you have each other and together, your Mom will get through her treatments and will come out the other side...and her hair will come back.
Until it does, get some cute hats and scarves for Mom and also contact your local ACS and make an appointment to get a wig. They are wonderful at ACS and will help your Mom feel better about herself.
My daughter...bless her...was by my side every step of my cancer treatment. All 14 months of it.
She got me to appointments and she held my hand through it all...I leaned on her and she was there for me.
Just be there for your Mom and you will both make it.
Hugs for you both!
CR
It's ok to cry. I cried with my Mother when she was going through her Cancer journey. Now I have Cancer and I have had friends and family cry with me. She knows you are sad and scared. You all will get through this together. She is going to need your help. Just being there for her is the best thing you can do.0 -
You are a sweetie pie
I have a daughter about your age (from what I can gather). I know what the little things mean - they are big things. You and your Mom share a strong bond of love.
Keep being there for each other - all the members of your family. Come here and ask anything, one of us will have the knowledge or experience to be able to help.
Sue0 -
thank yousbmly53 said:You are a sweetie pie
I have a daughter about your age (from what I can gather). I know what the little things mean - they are big things. You and your Mom share a strong bond of love.
Keep being there for each other - all the members of your family. Come here and ask anything, one of us will have the knowledge or experience to be able to help.
Sue
i am 19 years old...i just turned 19 last month, im growing up fast is what ive been told...and yes i spend a lot of time with my mom, more than anyone else...i dont work to be with her and i go to school at night when my dad and sister are home from work to take care of her...i called the ACS today to see how they can help me to get a wig for my mom!!! they said they would call back in 1 to 2 days to let us know where we can go visit them to like a Wig Bank i think she called it! Im very excited! i hope it does boost up my moms self esteem! and i hope she starts to feeel comfortable wearing a wig!
thank you!0 -
14 months of treatment!CR1954 said:Isabel.....
I know that both you and your Mom are both scared and sad. I'm afraid that to have thise feelings is sooo normal.
But you have each other and together, your Mom will get through her treatments and will come out the other side...and her hair will come back.
Until it does, get some cute hats and scarves for Mom and also contact your local ACS and make an appointment to get a wig. They are wonderful at ACS and will help your Mom feel better about herself.
My daughter...bless her...was by my side every step of my cancer treatment. All 14 months of it.
She got me to appointments and she held my hand through it all...I leaned on her and she was there for me.
Just be there for your Mom and you will both make it.
Hugs for you both!
CR
thats a very long time!! i really do hope to be able to stay strong for as long as my mom is in treatment its very hard, but im glad you had your daughter by your side at all times, thats how i am with my mom i have gone with her to every single doctor visits, the only one i wasnt at, was the one where she was told she had cancer she was just with my dad but i take her to every appointment tomorrow im going to take her to a clinic where they do achupuncture(i think thats how its spelled
and i hope it does help her out!! and thank you for telling me to call the ACS for a wig! I DID earlier today!! Im very excied for that!
Thank You CR19540 -
Thank You For the adviceKathiM said:I'm sorry you are struggling....
But your mom sounds like a strong lady, and will prevail!
Yeah, it's a shock when a parent gets sicks...THEY are supposed to be INVINCIBLE!!!
But your mom knows she must go thru this to get on with her life, and you know it, too! Sure, bald is not the 'new' hair...but when it's over, your mom's hair will come back. Mine did, in full force!!!!!! I need a haircut every 6 weeks, or it's completely unmanagable!
My advice is to support your mom in her fight, which you are doing. You can be honest, if the stress gets too great, and tell her (hopefully without tears..she has enough on her plate without having to put a daughter back together...lol) calmly that you love her, and that you will do anything to help.
My daughter was my caregiver, and she was a rock! Both with the colon cancer, where I dropped 45 pounds and was in bed all the time, and 6 months later with the breast cancer. She now says that she was frightened, but didn't want me to see it, and so she talked to her dad (my ex) whenever things got too tough.
I agree with Donna, suggest she get on here, too!
Hugs from a mom, and a daughter (my mom has had cancer twice, too, just like me!),
Kathi
i think i will probably do the same as your daughter as in telling my mom how scared i was when she gets better now i dont cause i feel that if i do she wont want to tell me when she is in pain because she wont want me to worry and get scared but i really am i cry alone all the time, i just dont want my mom to see me cry because then she gets sad too but i will work on a better way to cope with this because theres days when im happy theres days when im mad at everyone theres days when im sad or when i cry all day and just days when i want to be alone or days when i feel like drinking will relieve my pain but i know it doesnt, im really gonna look into support groups because i would really want to meet more ppl that i can talk to like yourself! thank you for your reply and im new to this but im really liking it already!
take care kathi! 0 -
ACS
The American Cancer Society can help you get in touch with support groups or counselling if you need it. They also have a support group called "look good, feel better" who can help with tips on make-up, hats, wigs, etc. They even give out free makeup samples to help out. You can go online and get a free TLC catalog. TLC has lots of hats, wigs, and other things breast cancer survivors can use to make life easier.
Keep up the good work, your Mom is blessed to have such a caring daughter on her side. seof0 -
Thank You Very Much Donna!BlownAway60 said:Dear Isabel
Lord knows I am not an authority but the best thing you can do is love each other and be there if your mother needs you for anything. She may not ask but you will need to offer to help her.
Just eating was the hardest thing for me during chemo. You all may have to prepare the meals during the week around chemo. Your mom may only be able to eat soft stuff like jello and broth and such. Give her whatever she can tollerate. Her taste buds will be off. So nothing is really going to taste right but she needs something to keep up her strength.
There are lots of things you can do with scarves and hats that will help your mother feel better about herself and the hair loss. I finished chemo on the 26th of Feb and will start rads soon. My hair is about 1/4 of an inch long and I cannot wait for it to grow. It is very traumatic when your hair falls out especially if it was long. I had mine cut short before I started chemo. It did make it a little easier when it all fell out. Remember the hair loss is only temporary. It is supposed to come back in thicker and curly. Cannot say that mine is coming in that way it is not long enough yet to tell. Check with your local American Cancer Society your mom may be able to get a wig through them free. When I don't need mine anymore I plan on donating them to ACS or the University of Miami.
You have found a great website full of loving and caring survivors that will help you understand what is going on with your mom and how you can help her get through all of this. Post often. We will always be here.
Sending you lots of cyber HUGS and prayers.
Donna
PS: Tell your mom about this site. Maybe we all can help and encourage her too.
i did find a great website its great i read many different stories on here lastnight and told my mom and dad all about them this morning during breakfast she was surprised and inspired by all the different stories i told her!!! and yes my moms first chemo was very hard on us and especially on her ofcourse she didnt eat for 2 days she ended up in the ER room about 5 days after the chemo, they said she was dehydrated and low in potassium but she just wouldnt eat or drink annything and just vomit it was very hard seeing my mom like that her next chemo is next monday! my moms overall reaction to the chemo was severe the doctor said he had never seen anything like it, which was not something i felt good about hearing!!!! her skin got red and bumpy like a rash and in her head too it was so itchy but she wouldnt get headaches she just said it felt like her head was on fire it burned! by the way did u have any symptoms like that?? the doctor said he was gonna change the kind of chemo she is getting so hopefully her secod one wont be as bad!!
and i did call the ACS for a wig today!
thank you very much!0 -
My daughter and I...IsabelSierra said:thank you
i am 19 years old...i just turned 19 last month, im growing up fast is what ive been told...and yes i spend a lot of time with my mom, more than anyone else...i dont work to be with her and i go to school at night when my dad and sister are home from work to take care of her...i called the ACS today to see how they can help me to get a wig for my mom!!! they said they would call back in 1 to 2 days to let us know where we can go visit them to like a Wig Bank i think she called it! Im very excited! i hope it does boost up my moms self esteem! and i hope she starts to feeel comfortable wearing a wig!
thank you!
went to the ACS branch here in Florida and had a blast trying on wigs and hats and scarves.
It was one of the highlights of this whole ordeal. As it turned out, I HATED the wig and mostly wore hats. I also had a few straggly hairs that kept my hope alive for the return.
Now as you can see from my picture they're all back and WHITE and so soft! I love my new hair! I was lucky in the fact that it started growing back DURING chemo, so the time I had with no hair was very short compared to most women who go through this. I hope your mom has that luck. Having such a caring daughter is such a blessing! I pray God watches over both of you through this battle. AMEN.0 -
Your Hair Looks GREAT!Mama G said:My daughter and I...
went to the ACS branch here in Florida and had a blast trying on wigs and hats and scarves.
It was one of the highlights of this whole ordeal. As it turned out, I HATED the wig and mostly wore hats. I also had a few straggly hairs that kept my hope alive for the return.
Now as you can see from my picture they're all back and WHITE and so soft! I love my new hair! I was lucky in the fact that it started growing back DURING chemo, so the time I had with no hair was very short compared to most women who go through this. I hope your mom has that luck. Having such a caring daughter is such a blessing! I pray God watches over both of you through this battle. AMEN.
and so do u!
and i will hopefully be going to the nearest ACS branch near me SOON! i just called today so im really looking forward to that! i hope my mom feels comfortable wearing a wig but if not hats and scarves will hopefully be satisfying for her! i hope!
and im glad you were lucky for growing your hair back really quick!!
i really really do hope my mom has the same luck!
thank you very much!0 -
ACS...seof said:ACS
The American Cancer Society can help you get in touch with support groups or counselling if you need it. They also have a support group called "look good, feel better" who can help with tips on make-up, hats, wigs, etc. They even give out free makeup samples to help out. You can go online and get a free TLC catalog. TLC has lots of hats, wigs, and other things breast cancer survivors can use to make life easier.
Keep up the good work, your Mom is blessed to have such a caring daughter on her side. seof
i heard about that support group "look good, feel better" but how does that work??
do i just call? do i have to find the nearest branch near me? i dont really know how that works...i really would want my mom to get a boost in her self confidence today her hair is still falling i cried all weekend long but i am really getting good advice here and its making me strong i dont want to cry anymore i want to see the bright side to it all, i want to push and push til my mom looks and feels good!!! should i call the ACS and ask about the "look good, feel better" or look it up online?? 0 -
Look Good, Feel BetterIsabelSierra said:ACS...
i heard about that support group "look good, feel better" but how does that work??
do i just call? do i have to find the nearest branch near me? i dont really know how that works...i really would want my mom to get a boost in her self confidence today her hair is still falling i cried all weekend long but i am really getting good advice here and its making me strong i dont want to cry anymore i want to see the bright side to it all, i want to push and push til my mom looks and feels good!!! should i call the ACS and ask about the "look good, feel better" or look it up online??
I just attended a Look Good, Feel Better class last week. I think you and your mom would really enjoy going to one of those. Just call the ACS toll-free number and they will hook you up with a session in your area. It was a 2-hour class and we got a makeup case full of over $200 in free brand-name cosmetics! A cosmetologist explained how to use the makeup and how your skin changes during chemo and how to fix some of those issues (blotchy, dry skin). A hairstylist brought wigs along to try on anyone who wanted to do that and if you didn't already have one, you could take one home for free. She had just picked them up at the local ACS building. She also showed us how to use scarves. It was a great class and I am so glad I went. Please sign up to go to one with your mom - you will both come away feeling better!0 -
I too ended up in the hospitalIsabelSierra said:Thank You Very Much Donna!
i did find a great website its great i read many different stories on here lastnight and told my mom and dad all about them this morning during breakfast she was surprised and inspired by all the different stories i told her!!! and yes my moms first chemo was very hard on us and especially on her ofcourse she didnt eat for 2 days she ended up in the ER room about 5 days after the chemo, they said she was dehydrated and low in potassium but she just wouldnt eat or drink annything and just vomit it was very hard seeing my mom like that her next chemo is next monday! my moms overall reaction to the chemo was severe the doctor said he had never seen anything like it, which was not something i felt good about hearing!!!! her skin got red and bumpy like a rash and in her head too it was so itchy but she wouldnt get headaches she just said it felt like her head was on fire it burned! by the way did u have any symptoms like that?? the doctor said he was gonna change the kind of chemo she is getting so hopefully her secod one wont be as bad!!
and i did call the ACS for a wig today!
thank you very much!
I too ended up in the hospital after my third chemo. I had dehydration just like your mom. I had diarrhea as well as vomiting. I know your mom doesn't feel like eating after chemo but she needs to eat something or at least drink as much as she can. The fluids will help flush the chemo out of her system. I would drink beef broth and eat jello when I could not tolerate anything else. Also Gatorade is good. Bananas are good for the potassium. I could sometimes tolerate a little yogurt. Rice, mashed potatoes and noodles are also good. There are pre-meds that are given before chemo that could help your mom. I was given EMEND, which works well for the nausea. Also I took Zofran for nausea after I was in the hospital. It worked a lot better for me than the compazine did.
There are lots of different kinds of chemo. I had 3 different ones and changed oncologist after my third chemo because my first onc was not very patient friendly. He would not listen to what I had to say, so I changed. I had diarrhea with all of the chemos I took. They can also give your mom lower dozes of chemo but more frequently. Like every week, instead of every 3 weeks.
Keep us posted on how your mom is doing.
Sending hugs
Donna0 -
That Sounds Amazing!!linpsu said:Look Good, Feel Better
I just attended a Look Good, Feel Better class last week. I think you and your mom would really enjoy going to one of those. Just call the ACS toll-free number and they will hook you up with a session in your area. It was a 2-hour class and we got a makeup case full of over $200 in free brand-name cosmetics! A cosmetologist explained how to use the makeup and how your skin changes during chemo and how to fix some of those issues (blotchy, dry skin). A hairstylist brought wigs along to try on anyone who wanted to do that and if you didn't already have one, you could take one home for free. She had just picked them up at the local ACS building. She also showed us how to use scarves. It was a great class and I am so glad I went. Please sign up to go to one with your mom - you will both come away feeling better!
This sounds great!!
and yes my moms skin is getting really dry!! its like peeling is there something i can do to make it better? i been putting plenty of lotion on her it helps a bit but the dryness just keeps getting worse!!
im really going to look into this! thank you!!0 -
That Sounds Amazing!!linpsu said:Look Good, Feel Better
I just attended a Look Good, Feel Better class last week. I think you and your mom would really enjoy going to one of those. Just call the ACS toll-free number and they will hook you up with a session in your area. It was a 2-hour class and we got a makeup case full of over $200 in free brand-name cosmetics! A cosmetologist explained how to use the makeup and how your skin changes during chemo and how to fix some of those issues (blotchy, dry skin). A hairstylist brought wigs along to try on anyone who wanted to do that and if you didn't already have one, you could take one home for free. She had just picked them up at the local ACS building. She also showed us how to use scarves. It was a great class and I am so glad I went. Please sign up to go to one with your mom - you will both come away feeling better!
This sounds great!!
and yes my moms skin is getting really dry!! its like peeling is there something i can do to make it better? i been putting plenty of lotion on her it helps a bit but the dryness just keeps getting worse!!
im really going to look into this! thank you!!0 -
Nausea Is The Worst!BlownAway60 said:I too ended up in the hospital
I too ended up in the hospital after my third chemo. I had dehydration just like your mom. I had diarrhea as well as vomiting. I know your mom doesn't feel like eating after chemo but she needs to eat something or at least drink as much as she can. The fluids will help flush the chemo out of her system. I would drink beef broth and eat jello when I could not tolerate anything else. Also Gatorade is good. Bananas are good for the potassium. I could sometimes tolerate a little yogurt. Rice, mashed potatoes and noodles are also good. There are pre-meds that are given before chemo that could help your mom. I was given EMEND, which works well for the nausea. Also I took Zofran for nausea after I was in the hospital. It worked a lot better for me than the compazine did.
There are lots of different kinds of chemo. I had 3 different ones and changed oncologist after my third chemo because my first onc was not very patient friendly. He would not listen to what I had to say, so I changed. I had diarrhea with all of the chemos I took. They can also give your mom lower dozes of chemo but more frequently. Like every week, instead of every 3 weeks.
Keep us posted on how your mom is doing.
Sending hugs
Donna
My moms Dr has been giving her different medicine for the nausea but it wont go away!
right now my mom has a cough it wont stop she cant even sleep!
i hope tonight she gets some sleep she has an appointment early tomorrow morning theyre gonna check her blood they said...i will ask the Dr about lowering the dozes of chemo my mom is getting and see what her options are, did u get really dry skin when u had your chemos?? my moms skin (especially her face) is getting really really dry! The Dr says its normal and i understand but he says that about everything!
And if so do u know what i can do to help it out a bit? to desrease the dry skin??0 -
Accupuncture helped meIsabelSierra said:14 months of treatment!
thats a very long time!! i really do hope to be able to stay strong for as long as my mom is in treatment its very hard, but im glad you had your daughter by your side at all times, thats how i am with my mom i have gone with her to every single doctor visits, the only one i wasnt at, was the one where she was told she had cancer she was just with my dad but i take her to every appointment tomorrow im going to take her to a clinic where they do achupuncture(i think thats how its spelled and i hope it does help her out!! and thank you for telling me to call the ACS for a wig! I DID earlier today!! Im very excied for that!
Thank You CR1954
a lot, they can do points for nausea and energy and even diarrhea. My onc lowered my dose after my first reaction was very scary. She said it wouldn't affect my treatment and it made a huge difference.0 -
You have great instinctsIsabelSierra said:ACS...
i heard about that support group "look good, feel better" but how does that work??
do i just call? do i have to find the nearest branch near me? i dont really know how that works...i really would want my mom to get a boost in her self confidence today her hair is still falling i cried all weekend long but i am really getting good advice here and its making me strong i dont want to cry anymore i want to see the bright side to it all, i want to push and push til my mom looks and feels good!!! should i call the ACS and ask about the "look good, feel better" or look it up online??
Time to be strong, you need all your energy to be a positive force in your family's life. The hair thing is so temporary, it's really an outward sign of all the struggle we are going through. Some families all shave their heads to show their loved one it's not important, others contribute lovely lightweight hats and scarves. I thought I'd hate being bald, but everyone kept telling me what a great-shaped head I had I ended up wearing my baldness like a badge of honor. Stick with your instincts and you will do fine!0
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