Kids do say the darndest things

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fauxma
fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
1. The child who came home from Sunday school singing Gladly The Cross Eyed Bear

2. My daughter in 2nd grade telling me she was getting all U's on her report card. At the conference I asked and her teacher laughed and said she got all E's but that she had warned the class a few days earlier when they were being very inattentive that there were going to be a lot of U's on report cards this time.

3. My daughter in kindergarten asking me what Piggy Pudding was. (I think you can figure that one out) We still sing it that way.

4. When a teacher told the class that the North Pole wasn't really at the top of the world, one child wanted to know if God had made any other mistakes.

5. My friend's son who told all his friend's that there had to be a Santa cause his parents couldn't afford all the cool stuff he got for Christmas.

6. My nephew when he asked me why doesn't Santa give poor children toys (we were taking stuff to Toys for Tots). His big sister told him that's because Santa needs to bring them clothes and food and we do the toys for him. He loved being a Christmas elf.

7. On a ride home to my brother's house my then four year old niece said that we're going to we're house. I corrected and said you mean we're going to our house. She looked at me and said with all the indignation of a four year old, It's not your house, it's my house. My brother almost drove off the road laughing.

8. The 5 year old on Romper Room that corrected Miss Nancy when she said Mercury was the hottest planet. He raised his hand and told her, No, Venus is hotter. She explained that Mercury was the closest to the sun and therefore the hottest planet. She did research and the next week announced that little Sean was correct. Sean is now a high powered attorney who graduated with honors from Harvard Law. We should have seen that coming.

So anyone have any anecdotes to share.
Stef
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Comments

  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
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    LOL Steff ♥

    I love all of these Stef! I think I especially love #7...lol I probably would have driven off of the road laughing. I have a niece just like that!

    The one thing that came to mind was when I was a little girl. ( long time ago lol ) We always had the most wonderful Christmas's at our house and always got spoiled rotten with lots of presents. However, I got sick and tired of never knowing what I was getting until "The Day". ( Christmas ) So, one year I snuck down the stairs, ever so quiet, late at night, to the family room. Under that big beautiful Christmas tree were all of these presents with the name Jeanne on them. Well, curiosity got the best of me, even as a child, and I unwrapped every present I had, looked at it, smiled, was tickled to death, and then wrapped them all back up so that noone could tell. ( or, so I thought ) Every year after that, my presents were never at our house until Christmas Eve. And then, the doors to the family room were locked so that noone ( ME ) could get in there until Christmas Day. The End!


    Love, Jeanne ♥
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
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    Ha Ha
    I love them! I had some stomach problems when I was a kid and Mom took me to the doctor.

    The doctor said that I might have gallstones and put me on a bland diet.

    What I, as a kid heard and told, was that I had globstones and that the doctor put me on

    a bladder diet. HA!


    Hugs, Diane ♥
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
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    Wow...all of these are
    Wow...all of these are funny... lol... Jeanne... have you quit trying to peek at your presents yet???

    I know I have a bunch but suddenly can't think of a single one...lol

    Hugs,

    ~T
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
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    I do NOT remember this at
    I do NOT remember this at all, but my mother used to love telling the story of me singing "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" when I was maybe 4 years old. I evidently happily sang "Oh Come All Ye Faithful, Joyful and Umphant." When my mom corrected me by saying, "Claudia, TRI-umphant"~ family history has it that I replied, " I AM trying Umphant!" I guess my personality was set in stone at a very young age, wasn't it???

    Hugs,
    Chen♥

    Also, my Grandfather died when my youngest sister was 3 years old. As we pulled up to my Grandmothers house, my mom, who by then should have known better, but was still guiding us, said to the baby, "When you see Nonnie, tell her you are sorry about Daddy Bill." To which my little sister asked, "Why, mama? I didn't do it!"

    We were all raised in Germany and traveled extensively throughout Europe as children~ Spain, Italy, France, Luxemborg, Holland, etc. Once, while visiting the US, we were taking a commuter plane from NY to Philadelphia. As we were about to land, my sister, who was perhaps 8 years old, asked the stweardess ( yes, this was before Flight Attendants) what language they speak in Philadelphia! We had rarely gone anywhere where the language was the same from the departure city to one we landed in! Why should going from NY to Philly be any different?!
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
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    chenheart said:

    I do NOT remember this at
    I do NOT remember this at all, but my mother used to love telling the story of me singing "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" when I was maybe 4 years old. I evidently happily sang "Oh Come All Ye Faithful, Joyful and Umphant." When my mom corrected me by saying, "Claudia, TRI-umphant"~ family history has it that I replied, " I AM trying Umphant!" I guess my personality was set in stone at a very young age, wasn't it???

    Hugs,
    Chen♥

    Also, my Grandfather died when my youngest sister was 3 years old. As we pulled up to my Grandmothers house, my mom, who by then should have known better, but was still guiding us, said to the baby, "When you see Nonnie, tell her you are sorry about Daddy Bill." To which my little sister asked, "Why, mama? I didn't do it!"

    We were all raised in Germany and traveled extensively throughout Europe as children~ Spain, Italy, France, Luxemborg, Holland, etc. Once, while visiting the US, we were taking a commuter plane from NY to Philadelphia. As we were about to land, my sister, who was perhaps 8 years old, asked the stweardess ( yes, this was before Flight Attendants) what language they speak in Philadelphia! We had rarely gone anywhere where the language was the same from the departure city to one we landed in! Why should going from NY to Philly be any different?!

    Thanks for the laughs!
    These are good! Thanks for starting it Stef!

    Kristin ♥
  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
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    Love all the comments. I
    Love all the comments. I cant recall any remarks made by me or my boys at the moment, however I have a cute little story. My adorable 4 year old great nephew told his mom on Tuesday, that he and his love Allison who may be a tad younger are getting married.

    He said he is going to wear a suit, she a wedding dress, and they are getting married at the circus! I roared!!

    I think he's on to something. Some weddings are actually like a circus, so much fun, or so chaotic not fun, some marriages are like a circus, so much fun, or so chaotic not fun. some people marry fun clowns, and some marry sad clowns etc. Wow this little guy could be a genius but I'm sure he and Allison will be having a so much fun wedding ,that is after the tux and wedding gown are purchased. :0)
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
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    Jeanne D said:

    LOL Steff ♥

    I love all of these Stef! I think I especially love #7...lol I probably would have driven off of the road laughing. I have a niece just like that!

    The one thing that came to mind was when I was a little girl. ( long time ago lol ) We always had the most wonderful Christmas's at our house and always got spoiled rotten with lots of presents. However, I got sick and tired of never knowing what I was getting until "The Day". ( Christmas ) So, one year I snuck down the stairs, ever so quiet, late at night, to the family room. Under that big beautiful Christmas tree were all of these presents with the name Jeanne on them. Well, curiosity got the best of me, even as a child, and I unwrapped every present I had, looked at it, smiled, was tickled to death, and then wrapped them all back up so that noone could tell. ( or, so I thought ) Every year after that, my presents were never at our house until Christmas Eve. And then, the doors to the family room were locked so that noone ( ME ) could get in there until Christmas Day. The End!


    Love, Jeanne ♥

    I had a friend like you.
    I had a friend like you. She not only unwrapped, she tried on clothes, and then rewrapped but she was good, no one knew. She actually was going to take out this sweater she loved, rewrap the empty package, wear it to a dance, and then open up the empty package put it back in and rewrap it again but thought better of it. I have a cousin whose father used to put up chicken wire on the upstairs so that they couldn't come down on Christmas morning before his folks were ready to. It's hard to believe that the little sweetie faced girl in your picture was a great big snoop. LOL
    Stef
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
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    chenheart said:

    I do NOT remember this at
    I do NOT remember this at all, but my mother used to love telling the story of me singing "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" when I was maybe 4 years old. I evidently happily sang "Oh Come All Ye Faithful, Joyful and Umphant." When my mom corrected me by saying, "Claudia, TRI-umphant"~ family history has it that I replied, " I AM trying Umphant!" I guess my personality was set in stone at a very young age, wasn't it???

    Hugs,
    Chen♥

    Also, my Grandfather died when my youngest sister was 3 years old. As we pulled up to my Grandmothers house, my mom, who by then should have known better, but was still guiding us, said to the baby, "When you see Nonnie, tell her you are sorry about Daddy Bill." To which my little sister asked, "Why, mama? I didn't do it!"

    We were all raised in Germany and traveled extensively throughout Europe as children~ Spain, Italy, France, Luxemborg, Holland, etc. Once, while visiting the US, we were taking a commuter plane from NY to Philadelphia. As we were about to land, my sister, who was perhaps 8 years old, asked the stweardess ( yes, this was before Flight Attendants) what language they speak in Philadelphia! We had rarely gone anywhere where the language was the same from the departure city to one we landed in! Why should going from NY to Philly be any different?!

    Those were very good Chen.
    Those were very good Chen. Sad as losing Grandpa was, that was so humorous and so like a child. And the language one was a hoot. Well, maybe she thought you were going to Amish country and there would be a little Pennsylvania Dutch spoken.
    When Denise was getting married in San Diego, I, my hubby, my best friend, her daughter and son and their spouses and their children were on the same flight. We all sat together. Chaundra's little four year old was telling everyone who was near us that she was going to Neecy's wedding. She then started asking everyone if they were going to the wedding. When the steward walked by she told him that she would see him at the wedding and when he said I don't think I am invited, she said just tell them I invited you. I was a little worried we were going to have a planeload of newly invited guests. She was so cute and so emphatic that everyone should come.
    Stef
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
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    fauxma said:

    I had a friend like you.
    I had a friend like you. She not only unwrapped, she tried on clothes, and then rewrapped but she was good, no one knew. She actually was going to take out this sweater she loved, rewrap the empty package, wear it to a dance, and then open up the empty package put it back in and rewrap it again but thought better of it. I have a cousin whose father used to put up chicken wire on the upstairs so that they couldn't come down on Christmas morning before his folks were ready to. It's hard to believe that the little sweetie faced girl in your picture was a great big snoop. LOL
    Stef

    Aw
    LoL @ Stef and Jeanne's stories! I never even thought of doing that when I was a kid. I should have and now it is too late. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

    KYLEZ ♥
  • DebbyM
    DebbyM Member Posts: 3,289 Member
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    natly15 said:

    Love all the comments. I
    Love all the comments. I cant recall any remarks made by me or my boys at the moment, however I have a cute little story. My adorable 4 year old great nephew told his mom on Tuesday, that he and his love Allison who may be a tad younger are getting married.

    He said he is going to wear a suit, she a wedding dress, and they are getting married at the circus! I roared!!

    I think he's on to something. Some weddings are actually like a circus, so much fun, or so chaotic not fun, some marriages are like a circus, so much fun, or so chaotic not fun. some people marry fun clowns, and some marry sad clowns etc. Wow this little guy could be a genius but I'm sure he and Allison will be having a so much fun wedding ,that is after the tux and wedding gown are purchased. :0)

    hehe
    Love your story Natly! Kids say the cutest things! A marriage at a circus! Funny!


    Hugs, Debby
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
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    fauxma said:

    I had a friend like you.
    I had a friend like you. She not only unwrapped, she tried on clothes, and then rewrapped but she was good, no one knew. She actually was going to take out this sweater she loved, rewrap the empty package, wear it to a dance, and then open up the empty package put it back in and rewrap it again but thought better of it. I have a cousin whose father used to put up chicken wire on the upstairs so that they couldn't come down on Christmas morning before his folks were ready to. It's hard to believe that the little sweetie faced girl in your picture was a great big snoop. LOL
    Stef

    Sweet face? Moi? lol
    Your friend had the right idea to take the gift, wear it and then wrap it back up. lol 2 funny Stef! I never thought of that. Drats!

    And, the chicken wire thingie? I am surprised that Dad didn't do that. lol He had plenty of that at the farm.

    The locked door did the trick. I never even tried again. Maybe it was just a "thing" I was going thru at the time. My parents used to bring that up at every Christmas. You see, I was the ummmmmm ornery one in the family. I know, I know, it is hard to believe, but, I am confessing to it. But, I have changed! ( sort of lol )


    Love, Jeanne ♥
  • Jeanne D
    Jeanne D Member Posts: 1,867
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    taleena said:

    Wow...all of these are
    Wow...all of these are funny... lol... Jeanne... have you quit trying to peek at your presents yet???

    I know I have a bunch but suddenly can't think of a single one...lol

    Hugs,

    ~T

    Hi Taleena ♥
    Have I changed? I refuse to answer on the grounds that it might incriminate me! Love, Jeanne ♥
  • cindycflynn
    cindycflynn Member Posts: 1,132 Member
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    Great stories!
    The best one I can remember is about 2 of my nieces.

    They went on a trip with their grandparents (my parents) and were staying in hotels along the way. Of course, the biggest thrill for little girls was the fact that the hotels have pools so they could go swimming. Well, the first night they checked in to their room, and once they settled in went to go out to get a bite to eat only to find it was raining outside. My oldest niece said "Oh no, it's raining!", and her younger sister then turned to her and said "Shhhh! Don't tell!"
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
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    DebbyM said:

    hehe
    Love your story Natly! Kids say the cutest things! A marriage at a circus! Funny!


    Hugs, Debby

    Natly
    He is definitely on to

    Natly
    He is definitely on to something. Weddings can be a circus and marriage is a lot like a circus. Sometimes you are on the high wire and could plummet any minute. The you are in the lion's cage trying to tame him and hoping you don't get eaten. And you fly through the air and you are caught in the arms of someone you trust beyond measure. Some days you are clowns, laughing and doing crazy things together and some you are a juggler trying to toss, catch and balance all that life tosses at you. Sometimes you laugh, sometimes you hold your breath in fear at the daring do, and you always want more. When you look at it in total though, a circus is fun and so is a good marriage. I really like that, he is such so astute for a small boy. A circus wedding and 3 or more ring marriage is a great goal. Someone should write this down and put it in his memory book. One day when he really marries maybe he will use two little clowns for his wedding topper. Would that be precious or what.
    Stef
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
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    Great stories!
    The best one I can remember is about 2 of my nieces.

    They went on a trip with their grandparents (my parents) and were staying in hotels along the way. Of course, the biggest thrill for little girls was the fact that the hotels have pools so they could go swimming. Well, the first night they checked in to their room, and once they settled in went to go out to get a bite to eat only to find it was raining outside. My oldest niece said "Oh no, it's raining!", and her younger sister then turned to her and said "Shhhh! Don't tell!"

    I am laughing!
    These are all funny stories! I needed a laugh and now I have one!

    HUGS!
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
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    LOL! These are funny!
    LOL! These are funny! Now, I have to think of one. HMMM ( puts on thinking cap )

    Ouch, that is my brain straining. :)

    ♠♣ Christmas Susie ♠♣
  • Ritzy
    Ritzy Member Posts: 4,381 Member
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    I am laughing!
    These are all funny stories! I needed a laugh and now I have one!

    HUGS!

    Love these!
    Thanks for the big smile on my face right now!

    Sue :)
  • lovelylola
    lovelylola Member Posts: 279
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    These little stories got me giggling
    which may not be a good thing at work!

    When my youngest (daughter) was 3 years old she needed to go to the dentist. I had all the visions of her older bro (who took 5 adults to keep in one place despite the Noctec syrup). But she sailed right through with not a peep or cry. Imagine my reaction when she began shrieking in the waiting room AFTER the procedure while I was settling the bill. I had just given her a paper cup of water. When I knelt down beside her she was sobbing the words "mama I aint got no wips!" She had just discovered the effects of novacaine!
    She still talks about this and to this day doesn't like novacaine (she's 23). Lola
  • Angie2U
    Angie2U Member Posts: 2,991
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    These little stories got me giggling
    which may not be a good thing at work!

    When my youngest (daughter) was 3 years old she needed to go to the dentist. I had all the visions of her older bro (who took 5 adults to keep in one place despite the Noctec syrup). But she sailed right through with not a peep or cry. Imagine my reaction when she began shrieking in the waiting room AFTER the procedure while I was settling the bill. I had just given her a paper cup of water. When I knelt down beside her she was sobbing the words "mama I aint got no wips!" She had just discovered the effects of novacaine!
    She still talks about this and to this day doesn't like novacaine (she's 23). Lola

    Laughing so hard right now at these!
    LOL Lola! Thank you Stef for starting these great funny stories for us to enjoy.


    Angie
  • Deb1969
    Deb1969 Member Posts: 165
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    Angie2U said:

    Laughing so hard right now at these!
    LOL Lola! Thank you Stef for starting these great funny stories for us to enjoy.


    Angie

    My nephew was in elementary
    My nephew was in elementary school probably around 8 years old, the age when they start asking is there really a santa. Well Santa came to see all the kids at school,my nephew told santa what he wanted but would not tell the rest of the family what he asked for he said if he told noone and got what he asked santa for then he would if santa was real or not.
    Heres the funny part, his mother had bought what he asked only santa for (something Scooby Doo)He opened the gift and said "there really is a santa, cause he was the only one I told"
    Deb