Dec 03, 2009 - 10:43 am
Sheeesh, what a shocker. Is stupid the right word? Ignorant, injured in some way? All of the above? Who knows, but all I do know is that it seems that even time and experience, with people who seem so heartless when it comes to dealing with the news of my cancer past, even time and experience don't dull the hurt when they react so coldly.
I am talking about an incident that ocurred yesterday after I joined Facebook for the first time. I started to look around for old friends from days gone by, just for fun, catch up and see what they have been up to, and I located one such friend and sent him a short hello and how ya doin? IMMEDIATELY, I get back a 'good to hear from you' and an add on as a friend, I mean IMMEDIATELY, obviously interested in chatting. So after more info on what he has been up to I sent a short description of what I had been doing. IMMEDIATELY I notice he is on CHAT but not wanting to interrupt and not knowing how to use it, lol, I didn't get into that.
Right away I get another email back getting into more of what he was doing and asking me what I had been doing, again. Obviously interested in communicating. Right? Well yes, UNTIL I mentioned going through cancer.
EVERYTHING STOPPED. Yup, not one more word, nothing, nadda. I was stunned. The way it was all going it was non stop back and forth but as soon as cancer came up - end of conversation. That was over 24 hours ago at least and since then he has had activity on his profile so not like he has been offline.
I was first diagnosed just over 20 years ago and throughout the whole time til now I have met every sort and then some who had various reactions to cancer being part of my life but it seems that you never get used to rejection. This person didn't mean that much to me in the past, just casual friends really, but I always figured him for a bright sensitive caring person. Yes there are all kinds of reasons why he hasn't carried on the communication since my bombshell I suppose but you had to be there, I have seen this before - thankfully not that often. It just amazes me how some people can just drop a person cold, just because the person has been ill. I'm just so derned proud of my human race sometimes. NOT.
Just kind of surprised me how I reacted to this backhanded manor, thought I was used to this kind of thing after so long. Guess not. We have all seen this after diagnosis I know, knew you would understand.