Trying hard not to let this get to me, looking for inspiration

Hi, I just signed up. My mom is stage 4 with breast cancer found in her liver and bone. She moved to be near me from Oregon. My brother is nowhere involved in this at all and the family has a long history of drama... So, now she is here with me and my family. And now, I'm the center of balance for my kids, my hubby, my mom, my life and now involving her into it. Yesterday, she had a bad day during chemo, she found out her count is still going up and she became so sad. It was all I could do to try and stay in the positive. Wow! its hard to wear a smile and focus on this when she is fighting back tears and saying how tired she is with everything. She is still very capable of caring for herself, but I've been trying to get her to set things up and keep me in the loop. So, when the time comes its an easy hand off. I think she is afraid of losing her independence and trying to get her to just understand its ok. Her doctor her is wonderful, and I can't believe the things that her doctor in Oregon did not share with us, like the cancer in her bones! Its like being hit by firehose, with a pause for a breath then i'm getting blasted again... Can't let her see me worrying, since I'm strong for her. Her doctor here has told her to go to Isreal this year. But my mom is putting it off. I dont know how to push her to go (cause she keeps saying how badly she wants to go) without seeming overbearing.. This whole situation is a serious juggling act! I just keep reaching for positive vibes and good words and actions. Somedays are definitely easier than others and on those other days- Wine is nice. i hate seeing my mom go thru this.