hi there

just finished a night of taking care of my partner.  my first time doing so.  he's finally asleep and i ran to my computer to find a support group.

a little bit of background info.  my partner and i have been together for eleven years.  last year he was diagnosed with hypopharyngeal cancer.  it is a recurrence, he had it about five years ago.  the first time he was on chemo/radiation for three months before going into remission.  he didn't suffer any major side effects except for extreme lethargy.  this time, however, it is having a major impact on our lives.  he's been on chemo for a year and has emptied his savings and taken out a loan.  i am also financially stressed because i'm picking up some of the slack and can barely get by.  the financial stress is what has been the major impact for the past year.  but, tonight was a new and different impact.

he had been feeling sick all day, nothing new.  but, then, in the middle of the night i was woken up by his vomiting.  he was vomiting so loudly that i know the entire apartment building could hear it.  it was like he was trying to vomit out his entire insides, i've never heard anything like it.  it was awful.  and he had diarrhea at the same time.  i don't want to go into details but, suffice to say, i am shaken up.

so anyway, i just wanted to say hi.