Mar 01, 2014 - 10:21 pm
Hi everyone. I am a new time member, and I am hoping to give some advice on here as a caregiver as well as receive some support.
I lost my mother last May to kidney cancer. She had only been diagnosed that past November. I struggled for awhile as a young caregiver (I am 21 now, I was 20 at the time and my father was not in the picture). She was very active until almost the week she came off of chemo(Wed), and passed away the following Sunday. I have gotten engaged to my long time boyfriend of 7 years this fall. I am struggling with her not being here for the wedding, and missing her company greatly as we were best friends, always stayed up chatting on the weekends and I lived with her my entire life until she passed away. I understand it gets easier with time, but I find myself angry and feeling it is unfair of her not to be here. I try to think positively because she would want that, but I cannot stay in this mindset for long. Does anybody have any advice to help me get through the healing process? or even a good help book they recommend? I feel very lonely, and people say they will help in the first few months of her passing, but months down the road when you realize she isn't here during your successes and failures, that is when you feel loneliest and need help. It seems as if people think you can snap your fingers after a short little while and be healed. I simply do not feel this, and feeling healed seems very far away.
With that said, I am sending prayers to everyone here!