Jan 14, 2014 - 6:30 pm
My husband had battled cancer for 8 years. We had our ups and downs and at times I didn't think our marriage would survive. But it did. On December 12 2013 the doctors said thats it no more treatment. Docs said he had 6 months, 17 days later my husband died. 6 days before he died he was driving going to his favorite restaurant with this best friend. He kicked my ass in Wii bowling on Xmas. 2 days later he couldn't pick himself up from the couch. By saturday he was in a hospital bed in our living room. On Sunday at 4:50pm he took his last breathe. The 2 days leading up to him dying I was by his side and cared for him completely. I don't know if I knew on Sunday morning that he was dying or not. It seemed in my mind we had 6 months still. While he was still coherent I told him I loved him and he told me he loved me but it never registered that I should say all the things I thought I had time to say. By the time I thought about it he didn't or couldn't understand what I was saying. I held his hand when my best friend took his last breathe and I never knew how much it could hurt. Never could I have imagined that 4 days after Christmas I would lose him. Now I am left with an emptiness that can't even be described. I have no friends. I have my work and I had him thats it.
No matter how much time the doctors tell you make sure you say and prepare for everything. When my husband died the hospice facility was in shock. Pretty crazy when you shock hospice....people who deal with this everyday. The pastor thought he would meet my husband over months he got to meet him once.
Cherish the time you have and say the things you should.
I miss my best friend. Every day Every minute.