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applejumper
Posts: 11
Joined: Oct 2013

Thanks for everyone's advice on the biopsy issue.  I have (finally) heard back from the ENT and they said that the ultrasound shows increased lymphadenopathy and a new submandibular node.  They didn't mention anything about any nodes decreasing, which my PCP had said so not sure what's what there...  

Anway, they want to see me so that we can proceed with biopsy.  My appointment for consultation is a week from today and then we'll go from there.  This is all still so surreal.  I thought once I got the biopsy rolling I would feel at peace a little more, but I am even more scared than ever.  

With some other weird symptoms popping up (slight side/abdominal pain and light sweating at night) my fears are increasing.  It was easier to believe in other possibilities when I was without symptoms.  My husband continues to chalk it all up to stress  but I have my doubts.  

Any advice for dealing with the anxiety?  

 

Em

Rocquie's picture
Rocquie
Posts: 391
Joined: Mar 2013

Dear Em, first of all, I am glad you are going ahead with a biopsy. You will be able to know, once and for all, what you are dealing with. All of us here understand your anxiety. I am anxious for you! You may consider asking your family doctor for a prescription for a little anti-anxiety medication to help you through all this?

I am so sorry to hear that your husband continues to be in denial, but I'm sure he is frightened too and we all have our ways of dealing with our fears.

Come here as much as you need someone to talk with--we truly understand and we care. And for the record, I hope you do not have Lymphoma or any other malignancy. But if you do, please know that Lymphoma is very treatable and not like other cancers.

Blessing and (((Hugs)))

Rocquie

 

jimwins's picture
jimwins
Posts: 1843
Joined: Aug 2011

I agree with Rocquie.  Anxiety is very understandable and I can say that Ativan helped me a lot.  It took the roar out of the WORRY MONSTER and helped me sleep better as well - especially in the early days of dealing with this.  Please understand it is normal for you to be hyper vigilant and anxious right now.  It helps to distract yourself and as I've said so many times to folks here - attitude and humor are free weapons in this war, use them to your advantage.

Playing on the "Auntie Em" theme, I found this on youtube.  Maybe this will distract you for a bit:

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=t4GV7V2Z17M&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3Dt4GV7V2Z17M

Hang in there and big hugs,

Jim

 

applejumper
Posts: 11
Joined: Oct 2013

Thanks for the support.  Jim, that video was great!  I have a nephew and niece so I am actually known as Auntie Em in my family.  Perfect!  

Tomorrow I have my meeting with the ENT/surgeon to discuss the biopsy.  I know I'm not going to come away with any definite answers, but I am definitely nervous about what I may find out.  Luckily my husband will be coming with me so he will have a chance to hear the information straight from the doctor as well. 

I will update after the appointment.  One step at a time...

Em

Rocquie's picture
Rocquie
Posts: 391
Joined: Mar 2013

I didn't see your post until this morning and wanted to wish you luck with your appointment. I'm so glad to hear that your husband is going with you. . .it is so important to have that support.

Blessing and (((hugs)))

Rocquie

 

applejumper
Posts: 11
Joined: Oct 2013

Let a whole new season of waiting begin.... Met with the surgeon and got the biopsy scheduled.  He is still very confident that it is benign and kept saying how this surgery is the right thing to do because he wouldn't want to let something go (he said it's either reactive or lymphoma) but he's really looking forward to me proving him right.  I actually appreciate the positivity and lightheartedness since I can be a person who sees the worst case scenario in everything.  And of course I would really like to prove him right also.  Anyway, the biopsy isn't scheduled until December 18th since I'm not a high urgency case and of course doctors are busy busy busy.  Then I'll go in for results on December 26th.  The day after Christmas.  Hoping for a happy late Christmas present then.  

So now I go back to waiting again.  Another month of what ifs and wondering.  I'm working to keep myself upbeat and occupied so the anxiety doesn't get the best of me.  Being able to post here really helps.  Thanks so much.

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