Jun 12, 2013 - 8:54 am
AA's beautiful graduation post about her daugther inspired me to reach out to the parents here who have dealt with the kids' emotions and worries after a parent's diagnosis.
My husband was diagnosed stage 4 in August 2012 and we have a 15 1/2 yr old daughter, a 13 yr old son and a 20 month old son.
The girl has this tough front that she puts on and to be honest I think she is a little angry with dad for getting sick. She had a meltdown earlier this week and wanted to come home from school. Said she had a horrible headache. I brought her home - later she opened up a little bit. She is just stressed. Said she doesn't want to see her friends anymore, hates the kids at school and is so worried about her grades. She's had a tough year and the grades have been up and down. We went out Monday night and talked, laughed and spend time together. She seemed better. She's the typical teenage girl - moody and dramatic!
Our 13 yr old has had a tough year as he was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in December, but he's been a real trooper in dealing with it. He's really a good kid and very positive, but he worries me because he's so sensitive. After my husband's surgery and then good report of no lymph nodes we decided that the cloud hanging over our home for the last several months is just not good and that we should take this news as cure and move forward. Of course, neither of us are so stupid that we don't realize that there is a big chance that it could come back, but we are trying to convince ourselves that it will not. It was hard to know how to answer the kids questions about the surgery and if they got all the cancer. Our answer was that they got all that was there for now. Hard to know what to say to them - why worry them about it coming back. Our thinking is they can worry about it if the time comes. I hate to give false hope, but didn't really know the best way to deal with it.
The baby - well he's just a baby. He's happy and cute and very energetic! It bothers me that he will most likely not have the same childhood the other had - worry free, fun, trips to disney, etc.
So, how much did you tell your kids? How have they dealt with things? Did they go for counseling?