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girliefighter's picture
girliefighter
Posts: 206
Joined: Mar 2013

Heartache, Hemmorhoids and Hairloss, You Are Not Alone!!

Everyone struggles with something either financially, emotionally or physically; it can be done privately or publically. If you have never struggled , you have never lived. While you are struggling, know that you are not alone, somewhere else in this world someone is struggling with you very same problem. Some struggles are seen in a public place and some are handled in privacy with such grace. It is ok and acceptable to be a strong family man and pillar of your community yet still curl up in the fetal position and cry your eyes out. People make the choice on how to deal with things; either head on or in denial is usually the two most commonly seen ways of dealing with stress or struggles. You need to cope with whatever is troubling you and find an easy way to move on and forgive yourself.

Surround yourself with good..Good thoughts, good people, good friends, good Doctors, good food and good DRUGSWink. Goodness- yeah I said it, is the key to being comfortable with who you truly are. The key is to always be yourself , and then there will never be any surprises along the way.

Having faith in: Yourself, your spirit, your Doctor

Love and Prayer are the two things that you can do for free and that make a huge impact on someone's life. Love for other people will allow you to recieve.

Selfishness is also acceptable...you can be selfish for yourself; you can sit and feel sorry for your friends and family because they have to be  bystanders while you go through something so tough, knowing that there is nothing they can do to help. You can get mad and ask "why me?", "how many crosses do I have to bear?", "why do I have all of these scars and side effects?", "why can't I live a normal life?" ,"why am I so sleepy?" ,"why do I have to sit in this room with other sick people?". Don't punish yourself and blame yourself for everything that doesn't happen exactly how you planned it. Accept who you are and where you are at in your life at this very moment. "Smile, not because something good happend to you, but because something worse DID NOT."

This my friends is what I have been working on, my "secret mission" as Jim called it. This is only a sampling of a book that I am writing. It will be about many life struggles not just Cancer, but I thought I would like to share some of the possibly pertinent stuff with all of you.

XXXOOO to all
Carie

jimwins's picture
jimwins
Posts: 2002
Joined: Aug 2011

I knew you were up to something ;)  Don't let that "Wonder Woman" outfit get too dusty though - not enough heroes in the world you know.  Great to hear from you too.  One of the good things to surround yourself with is humor/laughter.  

Hugs and smiles to you and yours,

Jim

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3162
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Carrie,

   Your book sounds like a good plan.Maybe with being off work for the summer you can dig in and get more written. Love your way of thinking sweet girl....your healing process will go easier with this kind of attiude. Keep it up! Smile

Love...Sue

(FNHL-2-3A-6/10-age62)

 

Rocquie's picture
Rocquie
Posts: 478
Joined: Mar 2013

I'm always happy to see your posts. It sounds like you are doing well and I am very happy for you. Have you thought of blogging as a creative writing outlet? I have had a food blog for years and find it very satisfying. I can write and publish my work right away for immediate satisfaction. Also, I love photography and have found that I like taking pictures of the food I cook. Later, you can turn your blog into a book.

 I have posted 3 times under "blog" at the "about me" section at this site. (Click on "read more" to see before and after photographs). Makes me very sad to see, but if I can help someone else, that is my goal.  I will probably be posting some more. I have also started my own Lymphoma blog using another platform.

Prayers and hugs,

Rocquie

 

 

onlytoday's picture
onlytoday
Posts: 585
Joined: Jun 2010

Carie,

Thanks for making my day!  What a wonderful inspiration you are!  Love what you are doing - keep at it!  :) 

 

((  ))  hugs to you

Donna

illead's picture
illead
Posts: 501
Joined: Aug 2012

We've been out of town for a few days, but wanted to say how great your new project is Carie.  It's a good outlet and also is supportive of all of us and others.  Keep up your positive attitude, you keep us laughing. 

Ugh Sue on those nasty shingles rearing their ugly head again.  Sounds like you were able to catch it in time, but know what a bummer it must be dealing with it again.  So sorry about the headache.  You deserve a break that's for sure!

We are feeling a little blue,  We found out yesterday that we lost a dear friend to triple negative breast cancer on Sat.  She fought hard and we would see her at the cancer center often.  Sometimes she and Bill had their infusions at the same time.  She was always thinking of others even at the end.  Her husband is going to be lost.  Cancer is such an enemy Yell Thinking of you all, Bill & Becky

NANCYL1
Posts: 228
Joined: Jun 2012

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Carie:

I think your words are very inspiring and will be good for one and all.

Writing helps writers, as well as  readers, I think.  Life is full of many struggles, and we need to know how to approach difficulty and survive it.

If I find  myself obsessing over a problem,  I write it down, read it and when I see on paper what the heck is bothering me, it helps.  Then I toss it out.

Here are a couple of Hemingway quotes:  I will put them in another post.  This computer has gone wild.

Nancy

 

 
NANCYL1
Posts: 228
Joined: Jun 2012

"Courage is Grace Under Pressure."

Hemingway

another quote later..............................

GKH
Posts: 292
Joined: Jul 2012

Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway

John Wayne

NANCYL1
Posts: 228
Joined: Jun 2012

 

 

 

 

The world breaks everyone, and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.

Ernest Hemingway

GKH
Posts: 292
Joined: Jul 2012

I have been pondering the relationship between Courage and Bravery lately. Here, in my not so articulate style, is how I see it. Bravery is charging that hill, jumping in the freezing water, climbing that smoky stairway at the WTC  to save that child etc WHEN you have the option not to do it. I have seen outstanding examples of bravery and it is selfless. I feel very privileged to have known some of the bravest yet totally unrecognized individuals I could imagine. People willing to give it all for others and not for fame or recognition, and certainly not for money. Courage on the other hand is what I see in cancer survivors. We have cancer. Its not optional so its not necessarily bravery that is needed. Courage on the other hand is the will  to persevere and endure and seek that cure as opposed to rolling over and just giving up. I am nor religious and I do not have any great fear of dying, depending on how I get there. The destination is the same but the road to it varies wildly from individual to individual. To me courage comes in the form of enduring and resisting the inevitable (we all eventually die) and looking at each day as a gift. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow belongs to no one. Today is what life is and is what we all should focus on, whether we have cancer or not. I think it was Will Rogers who said " We are all dying, some of us just don't know it yet". I know this all sounds a bit screligious. I am hoping also that no one is offended.

illead's picture
illead
Posts: 501
Joined: Aug 2012

We are very religious and not one bit offended, beautifully put, thank you, Bill & Becky

girliefighter's picture
girliefighter
Posts: 206
Joined: Mar 2013

You nailed that courage....there are so many courageous people on here, some of us fighting a fight that we really don't even know...lol...its like fighting in the dark, just keep swinging and eventually by golly you will hit something. Perhaps the blind folded pinata approachSmile... I don't care how it gets done, JUST KEEP FIGHTING UNTIL THE BELL RINGS!

 

You people on here truly are my family....heck lets have a family reunion...

sometimes I have stuff to say, but no real forum to say it....hence the writing

Max Former Hodgkins Stage 3's picture
Max Former Hodg...
Posts: 1039
Joined: May 2012

GKH,

I would say your analysis of Bravery and Courage is as good as I have ever seen.  I have been assisting a friend (a non-relative) who is near the end, after 13 years with prostate cancer. He lacks the "courage" part, as you describe it: That is, he is without  that "will to preserve and endure and seek that cure as opposed to rolling over and giving up."  Of course, he has few options, but his indifference is very troubling to us who have been arond him for years. Conventional chemo is the only offer on the table for him, after exhausting several pallatative new drugs, which did reduce his PSA dramatically, and which did extend his life for some time. He says he will refuse it at his oncology appointment this Thursday, which will most likely result in a Hospice order from the doc. Somethimes, this discussion about cancer has to be about the hard, final end of things, I find your thoughts above very timely and appropriate. Of course, we all need to be as "positive" and upbeat as possible, but that does not address where some of the guests are "at" in their treatment journey.

And, this end comes to the man of faith, and the man of no faith.  He has no faith himself. Cancer is like that line in Poe's The City in the Sea, where "the good and the bad and the worst and best, have each gone to their eternal rest."

Myself, I have been blessed by faith, and shall never forsake it. I have seen miracles first-hand, and more than once. Not all pertained to me personally, but several did.  If I were my friend, described above, and the doc said chemo could give me six months, I would say "Hook me up!", without having to think twice. But, we are all unique.

None of this has ANYTHING to do with girlfighter, who is young and full of  BOTH courage and bravery, and who will, with no doubt, be fine, very soon. It just happens to be where I encountered your thoughts, and I felt compelled to respond.

Bless you. Bless us all,

max

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