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Tips on telling people I have cancer?

AppDoo18
Posts: 1
Joined: Jan 2013

Hi everyone, 

Pretty new to this website... But thanks for reading and thanks in advance for any tips you can provide.

So I am 19 years old and was diagnosed with stage 3A gallbladder cancer 4 months ago, October 2012. 

I have been on Adrucil, which very luckily has not made me lose my hair (although it is thinner) and am at stage 2A. 

However, I haven't been able to tell anyone besides my parents and a couple of very close friends.

Being at college, I am afraid a large portion of friends will treat me differently. 

I am thankful for how lucky I am and how well everything has been turning out but I feel terrible not telling some of my closest friends why I sometimes need to run to the restroom after a treatment... 

Again, any tips would be amazing and thank you in advance.

 

Wishing you and me the best,

Alex

Marynb
Posts: 1134
Joined: Aug 2012

Hi Alex,

I am sorry about your diagnosis, but good for you that you are going on with school. You are very brave, although I am sure you wish you didn't have to be. You are just a 3 years younger than my daughter. I was a single mother and when I was diagnosed, she was in her junior year of college. I waited to tell her until I had no choice. I wanted her to stay in school and take her midterms. She was hurt that I didn't tell her right way. Like you, I agonized about who to tell and what to say.

I assume that someone at your college health center has been made aware, just in case. Other than that, you can choose who you want to tell. If there are trusted friends, you can tell them, if it is helpful to you. People will treat you differently for awhile until they see how you are handling things. You know that you will be inspirational to many of your classmates. We will all face adversity in life. I am sorry that you have to go through this at such a young age.

You will be in my prayers.

lourdes726's picture
lourdes726
Posts: 12
Joined: Apr 2010

Hi Alex,

Sorry to hear about your illness. I also was diagnosed with Gallbladder cancer stage 2, T2N0M0 almost 3 years ago. I had a liver resection and follow up chemo an I am cancer free. I was 46 at the time and I thought I was young for this type of cancer. but you are so young to have this cancer. It is difficult for others to relate and I found it hard to talk to people about it at first. I also just told my family and a friend or two. I think you should tell those that you will be supportive and are close friends. I felt like some of my friends didn't understand and were not supportive. Your can check the gallbladder caner thread for others with this cancer on this site. Gallbladder cancer 2013 is the newest thread of posts. There are others with this cancer that are willing to answer questions or be of support. Check us out on this thread.

 

Lourdes

Lily50's picture
Lily50
Posts: 209
Joined: Aug 2009

Hi Alex,

I'm Lily and I'm the resident cheerleader for Gallbladder Cancer on the discussion threads for Gallbladder Cancer.  I am a 7 year survivor of GBC Stage IV.  You are so very young and I'm so sorry that this terrible disease has entered into your life.  You are a very strong young woman to be dealing with this disease and still continuing on with your college studies.  Where are you located at?  Being so young can work to your advantage. 

Like others have said, many people do not know how to deal with this disease and even people that you may think would be supportive aren't.  It is totally up to you to decide whom to tell.  Many people can't handle this type of disease especially at such a young age.  You should not feel bad about not telling friends as some will support you and others will not.  That is just what happens in life sometimes. 

Come to the Gallbladder Cancer Any Stage - 2013 and talk with us.  We will all try to help you to the best of our abilities. 

Take Care

Lily

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