Dec 25, 2012 - 9:14 am
As I have posted recently regarding going on SS Disability and getting the stress out of my life, My decision to actually try to make this happen has just gotten easier.
For any of you with kids in college a long way from home, or kids struggling with drug and alcohol abuse, I have one of each. My youngest son is home on break and attend Kansas State University, a 6 hour drive from STL. My wife and I received a letter from the Financial Aid Dept. informing us our son will not qualify for aid for the second semester due to a low GPA. My son is a junior majoring in Construction Management and Engineering and unbeknownt to my wife and I, he has been emotionally destroyed by the news of my METS to mu Lung and Mediastynum. We have openly communicated to him the good and the bad news regarding what is going on with me, but my son has kept this bottled up inside, and did not know how to tell us he was not doing well the first semester.
If I can recommend one thing if you have a simillar situation, be proactive and communicate, as my wife and I assumed "no news is good news" from him. We have been so wrapped up in my battle, we even failed to check on his grades as we have always done in years past. I am also dealing with my older son who has relapsed on drugs and alchohol as a result of him being terrified I am going to die soon. DO NOT LEARN THE HARD WAY AS I HAVE RECENTLY FOUND OUT. REACH OUT EVEN IF IT IS HARD TO TALK ABOUT, I feel I have failed as a parent being so caught up with my issues, I left my kids all alone on an emotional island!!
I am definitely going to make some life decisions soon so I can instill some faith and confidence back into my kids
After a serious discussion with all members of my family, (very important to include everyone) my decision to actually apply for SS Disability, par down my finances, and simplify my, (OUR) lives is the right decision for us. I have finally set my career/professional ego aside and will take the stress of making a living based on what my team produces in revenue, all of the traveling, deadlines, ETC and toss it in the garbage. I have experienced first hand that I can either drag my loved ones down with my on my emotional roller coaster, or lift them up by simplfying my life and focus on keeping the beast at bay and living as long and as CONTENT as I can.
I am a huge numbers person, and planning and research ETC along with factual information is how I make decisions. I welcome and feedback and or advice or real world information from others who are already on SS Disability or have simplified their situation.
Merry Christmas to all of my CSN family.