Dec 07, 2012 - 12:55 pm
Today has been an awful day. Yesterday we had hoped of going home today or tomorrow, but that will not happen. David started bleeding again and his numbers are really low. They are giving him platelets now. The doctor came in this morning and said that we need to consider a long term facility because David needs 24 hour care. She also said that they have treated one patient with plasma cell leukemia that responded well to treatments and lived several months. I started crying in front of all the doctors. I had not even considered that David may not come home and then to hear at best he has months to live. It isn't fair. We were supposed to grow old together. We were supposed to have a life together. My heart is breaking. I watch him sleep with tears in my eyes. I want to be comforted by my best friend, but he is lying there in the hospital bed needing my comfort. I am grieving even though he is still alive. Yes alive, but hasn't lived in months. I pray we don't lose any more in our group. My holiday is really sucking. Sorry for the language but I am so frustrated and sad. Please God we need a miracle.