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Finally at peace

Cpnqueen
Posts: 29
Joined: Nov 2011

My husband Louie is finally at peace. He fought a good fight for 13 months but in the end his cancer won the battle. The last few weeks / days were so hard. Seeing him slip away a little more each day. He knows I was with him at the end and I did all I could to help and protect him. As the nuns at hospice said to me "Lou's suffering has ended but mine has just begun". How true those words are. This pain is still very fresh as Lou just passed away on November 27th.

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grandmafay
Posts: 1613
Joined: Aug 2009

Yes, we are so glad that he is at peace, but it is so hard to watch our loved one's life slip away. As long as Doug was here, I could handle anything because we did it together. Then I had to go on alone. We are never really ready for that. Right now, just concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other. I know those first few weeks were pretty much a blur for me. Somehow we do find the strength to move forward. Each of us must grieve in our own way and time. Don't let others tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Take care of yourself now. My thoughts are with you. Fay

Noellesmom
Posts: 1302
Joined: Aug 2010

Prayers lifted for you and your family that you will find brighter days as you remember your life with Louie.

nempark
Posts: 592
Joined: Apr 2010

Lost my beautiful 40 year old daughter on the 26th, she battled for one year. If this is any comfort to you, I must say that the nun's words are so not true. Your husband and my daughter's illness has ended they are at peace and asleep in death. We are going to miss them immensely but we will not suffer. I never thought that I, so soon after my daughter's passing could sit and write to you. I am not suffering, I am grieving and every so often I stop and think of her and I cry. Life goes on and if you think of it your husband would not want to see you suffer, you have already been working hard during his illness. Please do not think that you will not recover from this. I had an experience with my brother who was in an accident with his wife, he was badly hurt and she died. When he regain conciousiness he wailed and wailed and though that he would never be normal again. I must let you know that he found himself a beautiful wife and lives a quite normal happy life. I know it will take some time but you will certainly not suffer. God did not create us to suffer when our loved ones pass on, it is okay for us to grieve, but not suffer. Please forget what the nuns said to you and think positive, you still have your health and a wonderful future. May God bless you and give you the wisdom to face your loss with dignity. I would love to hear from you.

Cpnqueen
Posts: 29
Joined: Nov 2011

I am trying very hard to do what I know Lou would want me to do. I keep busy during the day and with the kids which makes my days bearable. Night time is the worst. I sleep with one of his shirts just for the scent... I bought a beautiful ornament with Lou's name on it and went to a tree lighting at the funeral home last night. A few minutes into the service I had to leave. I felt I was going to lose it. I am thankful my brother was with me to put the ornament on. I thought I was stronger. My daughter didn't come because she knew she could not handle it. Nempark, I wanted to private message you but couldn't. Please send one to me.

stubbysmom
Posts: 9
Joined: Dec 2012

I am so sorry for your loss.  My prayers go to you and your family.

nempark
Posts: 592
Joined: Apr 2010

I sent you  PRIVATE MSG.  look on the left side of your screen, the pink side and click on CSN Mail.

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