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I thought we could use a little humor today, so, here is a HA HA for you!

susie09's picture
susie09
Posts: 2933
Joined: Jul 2009

BLONDE JOKE

ONLY THREE DOORS:

An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"

The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

P.S. No offense to any blondes, as, I think my highlights put me in the "blonde" category too. lol Hope you got a chuckle!

Ritzy's picture
Ritzy
Posts: 4384
Joined: Aug 2009

I so agree Susie and thanks! I got a good laugh out of it!

And if you notice, I am blonde allllllllllllll over!

Thanks,

Sue :)

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1532
Joined: Mar 2010

A man walked into the women's department of Macy's in New York City.He found a saleslady, and told her, "I would like a Jewish bra for my wife, size 34B."

With a quizzical look the saleslady asked, "What kind of bra?"

He repeated "A Jewish bra. She said to tell you that she wanted a Jewish bra, and that you would know what she means."

"Ah, now I remember," said the saleslady. "We don't get as many requests for them as we used to. Mostly our customers lately want the Catholic bra, or the Salvation Army bra, or the Presbyterian bra."

Confused, and a little flustered, the man asked "So what are the differences?"

The saleslady responded. "It is all really quite simple. The Catholic bra supports the masses. The Salvation Army bra lifts up the fallen, and the Presbyterian bra keeps them staunch and upright."

He mused on that information for a minute, and asked "So, what does the Jewish bra do?"

"The Jewish bra," she replied, "makes mountains out of molehills."

--------------------------------------

(PS - I'm Jewish, and I nearly died when a friend sent this to me! Every time I read it, I hoot!)

DebbyM's picture
DebbyM
Posts: 3294
Joined: Oct 2009

LMAO at both of the jokes! Thanks! Abrub, your's was a hoot!

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1532
Joined: Mar 2010

And despite being Jewish, with my "endowment" I need the Catholic bra! Oy!

DebbyM's picture
DebbyM
Posts: 3294
Joined: Oct 2009

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. The next week the man realized that he would need his wife to wake him at 5.00 am for an early morning business flight to Chicago. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence, he finally wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5.00 am."
The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9.00am, and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't woken him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed ... it said... "It is 5.00am; wake up."

mamolady's picture
mamolady
Posts: 795
Joined: May 2011

When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal (current and past). For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls."

This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing. My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?"

Her response, "Because everybody always finish their prayers by saying 'All Men'!"

[Forwarded by Donald Smith]

abrub's picture
abrub
Posts: 1532
Joined: Mar 2010

Love it, love it, love it!

All women to that!

debsweb18
Posts: 190
Joined: Jun 2012

Loved all of them!

jnl's picture
jnl
Posts: 3873
Joined: May 2009

Love all of these too! Thank you!

Leeza

Megan M's picture
Megan M
Posts: 3001
Joined: Dec 2009

mamolady, is that really true? it is so funny and so cute!

laughs_a_lot's picture
laughs_a_lot
Posts: 1368
Joined: Mar 2011

I always have been in to the promotion of women. All girls.

survivorbc09
Posts: 4378
Joined: Jun 2009

These are all good! Thanks!

Jan

DianeBC's picture
DianeBC
Posts: 3888
Joined: Jun 2009

HA HA!

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