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PTSD

sue5749
Posts: 170
Joined: Dec 2010

HI, I WAS JUST WANTING TO KNOW IF ANYONE ON THIS SITE EVER THOUGHT THAT THEY MIGHT HAVE PTSD? MY HUSBAND DIED ALMOST 4 MONTHS AGO FROM THROAT CANCER AND I FIND MYSELF HAVING A VERY HARD TIME WITH THIS. SO FAR AS NOT TURNING ON MY PHONE AND THINKING SOMETHING REALLY BAD IS GOING TO HAPPEN. I EVEN TOLD MY DAUGHTER A MONTH AGO THAT I FELT SOMETHING REALLY BAD IS GOING TO HAPPEN???? ALSO I HAVE HAD A SORE THROAT NOW FOR A FEW DAYS??? I DON'T KNOW FOR SURE I THOUGHT THAT WAS FOR SOMEONE LIKE WHAT HAPPENED FROM GUYS COMING BACK FROM THE WAR??? WHOW THIS IS SOMETHING FOR ME TO CHECK INTO/ MAYBE SOMEONE OUT THERE MIGHT THINK ABOUT IT? SUE

Noellesmom
Posts: 1302
Joined: Aug 2010

Definitely a possibility with caregivers, Sue. Do a search on this website and you should have some hits, maybe under the caregivers section.

My husband is in remission from hypopharyngeal and base of tongue cancer. I've lost many family members to cancer, several to throat cancer. It is a tough fight whether the loved one survives or not.

Check with your physician: four months is still early in the grief process but you deserve, and need, to sleep well at night and to be able to face the day without unending and relentless fear.

Relaxing is something you will have to learn again.

Please talk to your doctor - this is very hard grieving.

If you want to send an email to me on this site, we can talk more that way.

Hugs. And try to take a few deep breaths and remember to exhale.

Alv4969's picture
Alv4969
Posts: 14
Joined: Jun 2012

I lost my mom on Feb 20 I was the primary caregiver I took care of her for two years and the emotional stress I had with everything. I basically did it on my own I asked for help but no one ever helped. I went to my normal doctor today (different reason) and she started asking me about how I was feeling about my mom and well for the most part I'm ok....I don't cry much (I cried with her). I told her about nightmares (about death) and I have started reading a lot...being more closed off than normal. I picked up and old habit of biting my nails just small things like that...things that have changed since my mom passed...well she had informed me that these are all symptoms of PTSD...and without help it will only get worse. She told me that PTSD is possible for caregivers to get...the difference is most don't realize the small symptoms like nightmares, being closed off, etc before it turns into complete panic of fear....my suggestion is speak to your doctor...my doctor gave me some support groups for caregivers...might help. Amanda

debbieg5's picture
debbieg5
Posts: 168
Joined: Nov 2010

Hey Sue,  It's been over a year since you posted this question and you may not even be on here any more.  ut even if you're not this could help someone else that reads it.  I have not been on here in quite some time.  I was on here regularly while my husband was going though treatment and for awhile after he died.  I don't think I would have made it through the first few months if it hadn't been for the other recent widows on here that I had recently befriended.  

 

I don't want to go into a lot of detail but my husband also had cancer in throat.  He had a laryngectomy but later cancer was found to still be present.  He was still going through chemo treatments and was horribley sick and weak.  Unexpectedly one night, I think an artery in his neck/chest ruptured.  I found him in bathroom just before he collapsed with blood everywhere.  It was a horrible sight and a horrible night for our entire family.  But I had dealt with so much bad stuff during his illness that it didn't dawn on me how hard this would be.  I thought the grief would be for a few months and then I would be all better.  Into the second year, things seemed to get wose and not better.  I had excuses for all of the various symptoms that i was experiencing.  It took a long time before I realized that they were exactly that....just various symptoms but the same root cause.  I finally sought treatment with a Christian counselor.  It didn't take long for her to explain to me that I was dealing with complicated grief and PTSD.  She explained that all those horrible sights and events from the night he died had not been properly processed in my brain and would have to be dealt with for me to heal.  so I have been working on that off and on for the last year.  It has not been an easy process but I do feel things are getting better.

At the time you posted this, you were very early into your grief processing.  You could very well just be dealing with regular grief at this point.  But please talk to your doctor or even a counselor to see what help might be offered.  I would also recommend to anyone the group called "Grief Share".  You can look at their web site and find a meeting location close to you.

Wishing you peace........

Debbie

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