May 08, 2012 - 3:32 pm
Hello everyone, I wanted to share our happy news. We are moving in a month, not far from where we have been for 17 years, but moving to a smaller home,a more afforadable home. My house is on the market and my younger sister has stepped up to the plate and helped us buy this home. Although I have had many tears packing my home that I shared with my late husband, Eddie, whom passed on 9-15-10, I feel that we are making a great move. I have had many tears going through this but there are alot of great memories of this home that we shared as a family and I wanted to bring the "good memories" along with me and leave the "bad memories" right here. I wanted to start planting new seeds are our home and begin a new chapter of my life. I feel like over the past three years that I have been through hell and back, it has not been an easy journey but I have made it through. I have to mention that I would not have made it through without the help of Sherri and Bill Marshall, whom words of wisdom have been implanted in my head forever. The last "party" that I had in our beautiful yard was that of our "renewal of our 25th wedding anniversary" that we did right before Ed passed away on August 7, 2010. It as a beautiful day and I will forever remember it as one of my favorite times in our yard on a beautiful summer day.
Life has been a roller-coaster for sure. Diana is will graduating in a few weeks from college, how proud I am of her. She stayed home the entire year to take care of her dad with me back in 2010 but did return and will be graduating with honors. I will be standing their watching her, so proud, and I'm sure, so sad as Ed will not be standing next to me watching his daughter that he loved so much. I'm sure he will be watching, however, down on us, up from heaven with my mother.
There have been many, many times that I have reflected back on my life two years. How the hell did I do it, how did I go through all of that and still remain sane. How many nights I would cry myself to sleep wondering how my life would go on. Well, I will tell you that I prayed alot and asked God to please help me, push me along to the next step and I believed he has answered. I read many of your stories and one that comes to mind is the post I just read about the lady to is mad at God. Yes, I was mad at him too, very mad for breaking up my family, Ed was so young, I was very, very mad and would not talk to him for a very long time, until one night I was out letting the dogs out and looked up in the sky and saw "two stars" shining bright onto my yard. That night, I knew that was Ed and my Mom looking down upon me and every night since then, those two stars are right up there in the same place. I went through my anger, I'm still very lonely and lost without him, but I have decided that life is a "gift"., something I never really thought of before Ed's cancer. Life is precious, don't take a day for granted, this is what I have learned and I left God back into my life.
Some of my old friends are still on here and I just wanted to let them know I'm ok. I will be O.k. I don't know whats in the future for me but I am still plugging along. I had 25 years with a great man and I wouldn't change it for anything. Maybe someday there will be another great man in my life, who knows??