Dec 17, 2011 - 10:14 am
I am new to this site and grateful it is here. I am just beginning this journey and need a place to release my feelings. Please forgive me if I ramble.
I had some rectal bleeding, not much but being 51 decided best to have a colonoscopy. That was in mid August. MD removed 5 polyps and they came back benign. About 6 weeks ago I found a tender lump around my anus while showering so went to my primary MD and she said I should see a surgeon. I am a nurse so I searched my area and found a colorectal surgeon at a university hospital and made an appt for 12/15. She did digital exam then anoscope. She told me that I have a mass consistent with anal cancer and now I am scheduled for a biopsy 12/23. She did say that anal cancer many times is successfully treated with chemo and radiation. I kind of knew that this was likely going to be the diagnosis so was not shocked. Now a couple days later I feel like I am in some kind of surreal whirlwind, my mind just races from scenario to scenario. This is a time when I wish I had no medical knowledge or that I could at least turn it off when it becomes "too loud".
I am gaurdian for my younger brother who had a traumatic brain injury in 1999 and also support my sister who is ill herself and unable to work. They both live with me and my partner. I am worried about them should the worse case scenario happen for me. I am trying to remain positive, my partner is very supportive.
I wish the biopsy could be done sooner I just need to know what I am dealing with and what options I will have. The nurse in me needs the plan. I will continue to read throught the forums here and will return when I know more. I just had to get some of this out. Thank you for listening.