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Linda News~

jazzy1's picture
jazzy1
Posts: 1387
Joined: Mar 2010

Feel it proper to let everyone know that Linda is having a rough time. Saw a posting yesterday and felt anyone who doesn't peek on the Ovarian part of site, might want to read what she posted --

She's such a fighter, always willing to show a positive side to anything. Keep her in our prayers as she requsted~

Hugs,
Jan

-------------------- Linda P...

I think each of the women who have reached this stage of their journey wonder if sharing a poor prognosis does this Discussion Board more harm than good. I remember all too well the dispair and grief that rocked our little world here when we lost Nancy, Dorian, Bonnie, Theresa, (too many others)....and my own personal reaction of sincere grief all mixed up with identification with the dying warrior's mortality and fragility. Then I think of the newbies here and the bright hope they have that I don't want to chip away at. I think that's why you see so many of our sisters here pulling away when they turn down this last path.

And it's also hard to tell it one more time when it seems like for days all I've done is try and spin this for my family and friends, one after the next, into something they can handle for now. And I know you all won't be as easy to buy into a rose-colored version. So I'll just tell you straight.

I have liver failure. All of those scans and tests showed no blackages anywhere, nothing 'fixable' anywhere. The good parts of my liver just haven't stepped up and picked up the work load of the bad parts of my liver we so successfully attacked with the radioembolism. Although my RBC, WBC, even platelets are all good and my vital signs excellent, my oncologist believes that additional treatment now would shorten my life and destroy the good quality of life I can still enjoy if I step away from the battle now. My eyes are slightly yellow with jaundice and I've gained 5 pounds with the ascites which feels HUGE to me, but apparently is considered a small amount still by my team. (We will do sonogram-guided parasentesis is I get really uncomfortable and I am taking 2 water pills daily to help with it.) I got opinions from a liver specialist and the doctor who did my radioembolism and everyone agreed. My acites sample had lots of malignant cells in it, so even if my liver kicks in I would still have new cancer to deal with. I've decided that palliative medicine can be a strategy, too, to staying alive as long as you can. I'm drinking 4 cans daily of Replete ($10/day!!) and eat whenever I have any appetite and WORK at that. I am consciously trying to make the most of every day and do a little work in the garden when it's sunny.

I met with palliative medicine yesterday and hospice is coming out tomorrow so that we can have an established relationship when the time comes that I need them. Palliative Care has already set me up on a pain management regime and bowel management regime. I never took painkillers the 3 years I've had cancer, and I am surprised to see how they can make it possible for me to do MORE, and have more fun, since I don't have the constant discomfort. I don't think of myself as in pain, just uncomfortable, but when I take those Oxicodone all that melts away. I learned something here.

I've always said I'd go down swinging, fighting it until the end, as I'm sure so many of you have. But when it doesn't make sense, choosing to conserve the beauty of the time you have left can be just as brave a choice. I hope you all can respect that. Please keep me in your prayers.

cleo
Posts: 123
Joined: Sep 2009

Just a thank you as I would not have looked on that site yet always look for Linda's posts.

SuziDezi's picture
SuziDezi
Posts: 25
Joined: Dec 2009

I too was wondering about Linda who is one of our brightest stars. I, for one, want to follow her journey wherever it takes her - and us.
Suze

jazzy1's picture
jazzy1
Posts: 1387
Joined: Mar 2010

Linda has been an inspiration for me and know many others here. Wanted to make sure EVERYONE knew the state of her health and send her lots of prayers and positive thoughts.

Best to everyone~
Jan

nempark
Posts: 595
Joined: Apr 2010

I would like to follow Linda all the way. What ever the situation may be. I am so saddened to hear of the latest news. June

Songflower's picture
Songflower
Posts: 632
Joined: Apr 2009

Love you Linda for just being you. You have fought bravely, taught us so much, and even helped me to laugh. I have a left pleaural effusion and go for surgery Wed. I also have a small liver tumor and a blood clot. Sometimes I almost feel we are holding hands on this trip. Me not far behind you. Thank you for allowing me to follow in your foot steps.
Love, Diane

Sara Zipora's picture
Sara Zipora
Posts: 227
Joined: Sep 2010

All the best on your journey, you hae helped me a lot..
Sara

germanlady
Posts: 20
Joined: Nov 2011

I have been reading Linda's old posts and am saddened to hear of her downturn. She is such an inspiration. God will take care of her and of us all whatever the outcome. I am reading a book called, "Heaven Is for Real" the story of the little 4 year old boy who went to heaven and back during a ruptured appendix. The faith of this child is amazing. One thing he kept repeating is you have to have Jesus in your heart to go to heaven. I have had many miracles in my life. If God chooses to give me another one, I would be happy. If not, God's will be done. So happy to have found you ladies. I am also looking for a support network in my town. I am still in shock as I was diagnosed Wednesday. The devil has a strong hold on this evil disease. . Blessings to you all who are going through this.

sabina57's picture
sabina57
Posts: 32
Joined: Oct 2011

I don't know Linda but from what I've read she is an inspiration; she obviously has touched many on this board. I will pray for her. My thoughts and prayers.

Best wishes to all
Sabina

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