Aug 31, 2011 - 11:43 am
I'm having a hard time right now. My fiancee is a 10 year testicular cancer survivor, and is in remission from lung cancer (ok not really remission, but he has no heath insurance and the indigent care at the hospital says watch and wait until it becomes life threatening again and then we'll look at more treatment.) We started dating when he was in treatment, for Squamous non small cell lung cancer, my family thought I was nuts to date a cancer patient, or at least not making a very good long term life choice, and some people even asked why I would do that to my young daughter, to bring a cancer patient into her life. Now that we are engaged, my family just avoids the issue, it feels like they look at it like I'm engaged to a corpse. This amazing man who is my best friend and an awesome "father" for my daughter, she is devoted to him and accepts his limitations better than the rest of the family. It sucks being stuck in limbo tho, and no one knows how to relate, I don't know anyone who is engaged to a cancer patient. Friends seems overwhelmed to deal with his wheelchair and often get offended when we leave the party after an hour or 45 minutes. We don't drink, we spend our time at home, in the garden or watching movies, regular family stuff, but it seems like a different planet from the rest of our peer group. Cancer feels like a different planet. Is there any way to relate to friends and family now, I know I'm a different person, but they seem the same.