My dear father, Harry passed away last Friday

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unclaw2002
unclaw2002 Member Posts: 599
All,

My dear father passed away on Friday, June 3, 2011. His obituary and link to the guestbook can be found at (please copy and paste the link)

http://www.lakelawnmetairie.com/obituaries/tribute.html?url=http://www.lakelawnmetairie.com/obituaries/tribute.html?url=http://stei-23818.tributes.com/show/Harry-Collins-91624617.

I am in New Orleans right now and the funeral is scheduled for Friday.

My father was an amazing man who fought this beast and was proud he was able to hopefully help in a small way to find better ways to treat esophageal cancer. We had an unbelievable experience in Pittsburrgh from the staff at UPMC, Dr. Gibson, the staff and nurses at the Shadyside Hospital, the folks at the Family House and the hospice workers from VITAAS. When we made the decision that dad was unable to continue with the chemo, even though it was working. "First do no harm" is real.

We fought this battle as a family - and have been to Sloan Ketting in New York, MD Anderson in Houston and dad's local hospital. But doctor Gibson was willing to go the extra mile for dad and do what none of the other doctors were willing to do. He applied for an individual clinical trial for dad and got the drugs that medicare wouldn't pay for - and that dad had fought to get from day one. And of all the doctors who I worked with over the last two years Dr. Gibson was the most caring, and down to earth doctor who listened and spoke to us and asked us what was important to dad and talked to dad about what he wanted. I had the doctor at Sloan who refused to even consider letting my dad in a clinical trial because it was her opinion that he had to have treatment in NO, or the doctor at MD Anderson who was interested in his clinical trial but unwilling to go to bat for dad when it turned out he got the placibo and needed help to enter another trial.

My folks were in Pittsburgh at the family house and we couldn't bring him home to the family house for hospice care and didn't want him to spend his last days in a nursing home or rehab hospital --- the folks in Pittsburgh moved heaven and earth to find us an apartment that would let us move into on a month to month basis (Knowing we were going to have hospice come in and out and have someone likely die there) - helped us furnish the apartment, provided us with dishes etc. and then made sure we had round the clock help with dad because of his condition at home. His last days were amazing and what a gift to my mom. Having him at our makeshift home allowed us to be there with him --- he had developed anxiety when we left him in the rehab hospital.

We really felt like the people became part of our extended family - and they showed true love and compassion. My dad was forever grateful for the opportunity he had. And so is my entire family. We have asked that in lieu of flowers memorial donations be made to UPMC in care of Dr. Gibson for Esophageal Cancer Research.

Much love,
Cindy

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  • Unknown
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  • K_ann1015
    K_ann1015 Member Posts: 500
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    Cindy-so many heartfelt prayers....
    Cindy--we have "talked" here for quite some time---I am utterly without words--I posted on your facebook---but so many thoughts going through my mind---which are NO match for what you are going through....... I just have to say thanks for sharing your dad's valiant story with us---he is a true hero. I just tried to check Caring Bridge today an--was wondering how he was doing. I wish I could make it better--- Someday---I do think --that we are going to make a huge difference in this disease that takes folks before their prime---with little to no notice---EVEN though it can be preventable!

    so many thoughts & prayers are with you & your family at this time. What a wonderful dad, husband & man Harry was---he's the kind of guy I want my boys to emulate
    with sadness, love & prayers of peace

    kim Heburn Priest
  • mrsbotch
    mrsbotch Member Posts: 349
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    I am crying for you
    As I write this Cindy the tears will not stop falling. I am so so sorry about your dad. What an amazing family you all have . What a blessing UPMC was able to get you all an apartment. That is so unbelievable. That is just the kind of love and caring that I received from them. I so hope your mom will be able to come and live near you so that she is not alone.

    You are such a close family and the things you have done to support your dad go above and beyond.


    Please do not forget us. I know you won't as I know the kind of person you are . I will call you in a few weeks or please call me.

    Know that we all love you very much and your dad WAS THE HERO.


    Love

    barb
  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,391 Member
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    So sorry to hear about your Dad
    Cindy,

    I am so sorry to hear that your Dad has left us. I am happy that he had a chance to have the love and support of his family close during his final days. He certainly fought a good fight. It is great that he is channeling contributions to help other patients. I intend to do the same.

    With my deepest condolences,

    Paul Adams,
    McCormick, South Carolina
  • DanaMB3
    DanaMB3 Member Posts: 98
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    Your father was a very lucky
    Your father was a very lucky man to have the family he did to help him through this battle. Thinking of and praying for you and your family...
  • nancyann3
    nancyann3 Member Posts: 173 Member
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    DanaMB3 said:

    Your father was a very lucky
    Your father was a very lucky man to have the family he did to help him through this battle. Thinking of and praying for you and your family...

    Very sorry for your loss
    I am so sorry. My prayers are with you during this hard time.

    Nancy
  • ArchTB
    ArchTB Member Posts: 150
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    Sorry
    Cindy,
    I am so sorry for your loss. But it warms my heart to know that your father's last days were peaceful and spent with the family.

    Olya
  • cher76
    cher76 Member Posts: 292
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    Cindy, it was with great
    Cindy, it was with great sadiness tonight that I read your posting for your father's passing. I can only imagine the loss you are feeling. He fought a good fight and you have done all you could to help. Please know that we are thinking of you and your family and praying for you all.
    Cheryl
  • linda1120
    linda1120 Member Posts: 389
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    Prayers
    Dear Cindy,

    I am so sorry to hear of your father's passing. I have loved going to his Caring Bridge and getting to know the faces and his whole story. He was quite an amazing man. You must be very sad, yet so proud that he is your dad.

    I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Please take care of yourself and give your mom a big hug. She really was a trooper till the end. I am so happy to hear that your experiences were positive in Pittsburg, and your father was able to be at "home" with family to the end. Family is what it is all about. EC brings that to the forefront.

    Linda & Jim
  • Donna70
    Donna70 Member Posts: 852 Member
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    linda1120 said:

    Prayers
    Dear Cindy,

    I am so sorry to hear of your father's passing. I have loved going to his Caring Bridge and getting to know the faces and his whole story. He was quite an amazing man. You must be very sad, yet so proud that he is your dad.

    I will be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Please take care of yourself and give your mom a big hug. She really was a trooper till the end. I am so happy to hear that your experiences were positive in Pittsburg, and your father was able to be at "home" with family to the end. Family is what it is all about. EC brings that to the forefront.

    Linda & Jim

    So sad to hear about your Dad
    Dear Cindy,
    So very sad to hear of your Dad's passing but so glad that your family and your Dad had people who cared enough to move heaven and earth to make his last days with his family comfortable. That helps to know their are such wonderful caring souls out there. Your Dad was remarkable for trying his best to try to help other EC patient's with his participation in the clinical trials. I am glad that Dr. Gibson was there to try to do his best by your Dad. It is a privilege to be there with a loved one to the end and I am glad that it was peaceful by your account and he was surrounded by all of your tremendous love. many hugs from afar and thoughts and prayers for the days ahead,
    Donna70
  • rose20
    rose20 Member Posts: 258
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    Cindy, so sorry....
    Cindy, I am so sorry for the loss of your daddy.
    I lost my daddy in 2006. We were all able to be by his bedside. It was so sad to see him go but yet so thankful he would know no more suffering.
    I miss him so very much and always will as I know you will your daddy.
    I know it's hard but I am thankful you got to spend much time with him. I'm sure you have many precious times you shared with him that you will tuck into your heart and cherish.
    God is there with you just reach out and take His hand.
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