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Lisa13Q
Lisa13Q Member Posts: 677
in Ovarian Cancer #1
Dearest Dearest Ladies:

Thank you all for your wonderful responses to my last post...It has been a grueling few days....Mom finally has 24 hour care and seems to be resting comfortably for now....with lots of medication.....she is surrounded by her loving family and grandchildren, who she loves dearly....She continues to fight. God Bless her....My sister and I have had some moments in the past few days. The following is one of my favorites: The Hospice Nurse came and basically told us to give her more medications...so we did and then the nurse told us that it was time to tell her "It's ok to go now....we'll all be ok"... you know how everyone says you need to do that in order for your loved one to give, in and relax and go to God...So sister and I get on the bed next to Mom and tell her all this great stuff....and Mom, who can no longer speak, looked at us, gave us the evil eye and mouthed "be quiet".....it was truly hilarious in a very maudlin way......Mom is Mom....we were expecting her to smile at us and peacefully meet her angels....That myth is over....W and I came downstairs and started to laugh and wonder what she would have been saying had she been able to speak and we decided she would have yelled at us and told us to "stop obsessing"....Mom has never been a Hallmark card kind of person...The other "moment" came when I was sent to get some Depends for Mom....I came back with the "wrong kind"..the correct ones should have been adjustable, wrap arounds...so next morning W went out to get the proper ones....she brought home enough Depends for a fraternity at their first college party of the year....they also were pull ups...just adjustable ones....so I took a pair of scissors, cut the sides, got tape and said, "here we go".....I never knew how hard it is to find the "right" size of these adult undies....we both laughed at the insanity of these things.....so Mom has duct tape underwear, and right now is resting......Thanks to you all for everything....no one "gets this" like you.....I will continue to keep you posted.....

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  • LaundryQueen
    LaundryQueen Member Posts: 676
    #2
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    Dearest Lisa: I guess it
    Dearest Lisa: I guess it helps to laugh when you feel like crying. Because of my hoarding tendencies (I hang onto stuff "just in case"), my last words to my children will probably be "OK, you can go get the dumpster now." : )

    Glad to hear you & W have found something to laugh about.

    LQ
  • Hissy_Fitz
    Hissy_Fitz Member Posts: 1,834
    #3
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    Lisa, clearly your mom is
    Lisa, clearly your mom is not waiting for permission to go gently into that good night. You MUST tell the Hospice nurse about this. She might think twice about offering that advice to anyone else, though it is definitely standard operating procedure for Hospice workers. I'm betting they have never heard of a response like your mom's.

    It's great to see you haven't lost your sense of humor. Sometimes we need to laugh, even in the middle of something so tragic.

    Carlene
  • MK_4Dani
    MK_4Dani Member Posts: 314
    #4
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    I get it! My funny story:
    About 10 years ago, when my mom was in the hospital, the doctors told my family there is "nothing left to do" we decided to remove all of the tubes. My mom was on a heavy morphine drip and when we all gather around her bed my mom started snoring. Very loud, we were lughing so hard the ICU nurses came in to investigate. The nurse looked at us like we were insane, then she heard my mom snoring and started laughing with us. The nurses had to roll her around so she wouldn't snore! In hindsight that laughter was the start of healing, remembering my mom as the loudest snoring woman east of the Mississippi in passing as she was in life.
    Hang in there Lisa,
    Mary
  • kikz
    kikz Member Posts: 1,345 Member
    #5
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    MK_4Dani said:

    I get it! My funny story:
    About 10 years ago, when my mom was in the hospital, the doctors told my family there is "nothing left to do" we decided to remove all of the tubes. My mom was on a heavy morphine drip and when we all gather around her bed my mom started snoring. Very loud, we were lughing so hard the ICU nurses came in to investigate. The nurse looked at us like we were insane, then she heard my mom snoring and started laughing with us. The nurses had to roll her around so she wouldn't snore! In hindsight that laughter was the start of healing, remembering my mom as the loudest snoring woman east of the Mississippi in passing as she was in life.
    Hang in there Lisa,
    Mary

    You made me smile Lisa
    I know that even though none of us wants to be in this group I have to say I am so proud of all the women in it. This journey is so difficult and yet there are opportunities to laugh and look at ourselves or our loved ones as more than a just sick person. God bless you and your family.

    Karen
  • poopergirl14052
    poopergirl14052 Member Posts: 1,183 Member
    #6
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    kikz said:

    You made me smile Lisa
    I know that even though none of us wants to be in this group I have to say I am so proud of all the women in it. This journey is so difficult and yet there are opportunities to laugh and look at ourselves or our loved ones as more than a just sick person. God bless you and your family.

    Karen

    Oh Lisa the insanity of it all
    you have to laugh before you cry. Little things like duct tape and depends are so amusing but the reality of it is so heartbreaking. I can only wish your moms journey is calm and peaceful. May angels watch over her. God bless you and your family....val

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