Feb 13, 2011 - 11:59 am
16 yrs ago diagnosed with hashimotos- scan/biopsy- etc. Unfortunatley could not put me on meds- as swing from hypo/hyper- HELL!
fast forward- had baby- OB noticed lumps- which knew I had but was told less chance cancer with HASHIMOTOS (not true I now find out)- have U/s and then see endo who sends me to surgeon- takes it out. NOW finds two tumors- follicular variant- architecture- follicular- partially encapsulated and capsular involvement. Also two suspicious lymph nodes- negative.
Fiance was to "watch" baby so I could have RAI/WBS- but said he couldnt get vacation for 4 months. (ON holiday) I was cooking for his friends/family who were about to arrive and he went off on me for getting drops water on his kitchen table. (He had asked me to go away that day- to a special place of ours ... as this holiday date was a special anniversary of sorts- baby girl bday who died- and I so needed a vacation- and then he invited people over.) About to cry as write this. Me and baby went to park that day- came back- he wouldnt let us in. He is drunk. Proceeded to kick us out of house -with no money-diapers- nothing. Said I embarassed him by going to park- even though he was screaming in my ear- trying to unhook new baby in tummy pouch. (He is a DJ and I used to do karaoke for him- which couldnt as was bedridden with baby- then surgery- sick- unable to sing- hard to speak.) WE stayed at a hotel - as had moved to that state to be with him- and family put mony in my bank acct. I attempted to get me/babys things- wouldnt let me. Police tried to get me in women's shelter- full. Stayed at hotel. Flew out next day.
SO had to start all over- find a new doctor- for me and baby (baby was born with birth defect). Try to work on things with dad- he just says how we deserved it- if I didnt get water/was nicer- etc. Even though have this going on- dad refuses to accept/sign paternity of baby. Visted at Christmas.
DR. took off meds for a month- OMG- hypo HELL! 10 days before RAI_ TSH was at 84. YOW! SOO TIRED! Face sweelling-legs hurting ...tingling arms/legs ...
Last week- FINALLY had RAI and arranged for aunt to watch baby- as can not be around. Dad got mad and came in and watched baby one day. Had been trying so hard to work on things with him- worried I am very sick. Dad brought his taxes with him- as e wants to claim baby and get $$- which he has not supplied anything for baby- now 9 mos old- except about $50 in things.And wants me to do taxes for HIM- and I am sick/freezing- tired ... nauseated from RAI ... and my "gully" swelled up looking like a LINEBACKER!
Other day had WBS- something lighting up near thyroid area- like circles- same sizes as bladder- which also lit up- as did my lungs. Looked diffuse/speckled and more on left side than right- but have liver on right. I just know that isnt good. Also seemed to be able to see my hips and wrists- and donno about that either. ?????
"Fiance'" decided to call before my WBS and yell at me about how I should have been nicer to he and his family- and I wouldnt have to get treated badly ... going on about an incident almost a year ago. Tells me I am happy there- just to stay there and he is sick of hearing about how I dont feel well/cancer- hope all goes well- goodbye. I tried to reach him (his cell) after my WBS and cell is off. I left VM and on his home phone. No call from him ... 2 days later he calls. Says he hasnt heard from me and thought I was dead- well you shouldve called. He says well we were fighting. Well- I am not feeling supported- in fact- each time you arent there for me and basically run the other way- so why didnt you call again? My phone ran out of battery- what about when you got home from work? The next day when you were off? SAYS- I DIDNT CALL CAUSE YOU ARE FAKING. What? (I laugh) How am I doing that? He says this is what he hates about me- I ask too many questions. ??? SO I tell him sorry he feels that way- I can put him in touch with my doctor or show him my results- silence. I tell him nothing more to say to him - I ahve more important things to fight than him- LIKE CANCER- and he obviously doesnt care and I hang up. He calls when on phone with sister (other line) and I don't answer. At a loss for words. FAKING IT?
So I am worried about my WBS- LUNG UPTAKE? Breast uptake? I donno. Any thoughts?