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New Furniture

mswijiknyc's picture
mswijiknyc
Posts: 421
Joined: Oct 2010

Ever since he insisted on it, I have hated the couch. It's a nice theatre style sectional with microfiber, consoles in between the seats with cup holders and cubbys, and the ends recline. I have been saying for a month I will be getting rid of the couch meaning I'm going to try to sell it for half to three quarters of what we paid for it.

I think he heard me. And I think I'm getting payback.

On one end there are so many bodily fluids that I'm not even going to try to clean it. More so now as he tried to get up (again) and managed to get . . . fluid . . . everywhere, most of it where? you guessed it - on the couch.

Patrick I love you. And this would be the kind of crap you would pull when you were normal.

The not letting me sleep thing is a new one. I commend you for thinking outside of the box on that one. You have always said I sleep too much.

So still at square one - keeping watch and waiting. Can't be too much more. Fluid is collecting in his feet now, and he is starting to bruise. That and the timeframe is about what we thought it would be. I just hope it's not Monday. That would just suck.

hope0310's picture
hope0310
Posts: 324
Joined: May 2010

Thinking of you both. Your love shows through in all your post, and you always keep it so real. Even with cancer, Pat is still who he is, not someone you treat differently etc. I have such great admiration for the way you seem to be handling this.

Are you there alone, or is there family close by? Just wondered....

Much love hon,
Elysia

mr steve
Posts: 286
Joined: Sep 2009

{hug}

3Mana
Posts: 829
Joined: Aug 2010

April,
Wow, Patrick sure is a fighter isn't he? This has got to be so stressful for you. Every day you probably wonder if this is going to be the day. Sorry about your couch, but just keep thinking "new furniture"! I had to get new living room carpeting after Tom died cause the EMT"s brought him from the bathroom and laid him on the carpeting with nothing underneath him. My son immediately started trying to scrub it after they took Tom away, but it just made it worse. Blood is always hard to get out. Put a throw rug over it, but couldn't stand looking at that, so bought new carpeting.
Take care & hope Patrick doesn't suffer much longer. I'll say a prayer for him! "Carole"

Mikki332
Posts: 49
Joined: Nov 2010

.....in thought and prayer. Sounds like Patrick has been so blessed to have you by his side, and that you have been blessed by him. I can't imagine being where you are now....just know that we all care!
Mikki

karenbeth's picture
karenbeth
Posts: 194
Joined: Sep 2010

I hope you get to have Monday together.

zinniemay's picture
zinniemay
Posts: 534
Joined: Mar 2009

April, Even in saddness you find a way to make me smile, I never got to know Patrick , but believe he is the guy you tell us about, and that he is showing you a thing or too. I keep praying in the only way I know how. I never ask for some one to live or die ,I leave that to god. I pray for peace , I think in asking for peace , it will say it all.
I remeber watching Aunty dieing and think oh god, so I took my two children for a walk and there was a church along the way. So I prayed and asked for peace. When we talked back she had passed and there was such peace for her and the family.
I wish for you and Patirck to have peace what ever that may be .. You are in my hearts thoughs and prayers , My friend
Momma Jennie

DrMary's picture
DrMary
Posts: 527
Joined: Nov 2010

I will be singing that one for hours now.

This is a guy who obviously leaves no beer in the can, no catsup on the plate and no second of life with you unlived. I hope it goes as best as it can, but am still sorry it's going.

mswijiknyc's picture
mswijiknyc
Posts: 421
Joined: Oct 2010

That was one of the first things he told me after he got home from the hospital. Suuuuuure hun not a problem. So I continue to bust his chops when needed, and give him tenderness when needed. He trusts me to give it to him straight when he needs it, like the last time he was in the hospital. Any time anyone came to talk to him, if he didn't understand or didn't hear everything they said because of his tinnitus, he looked right at me and waited for the explanation. And he got it in a way he understood.

My husband is a stubborn Irish man and when he wants something he fights for it. His body will give out long before his spirit and mind will. He's always been hard on himself, so this is no surprise.

I was able to get a hospital bed today and was able to clean him up a bit and put on clean clothes. It's to the point of if he wears it and it gets dirty I throw it out. I not sure if I will be able to clean it and he is so tiny now that nothing of his would fit me anyway. And the sheets on his bed are ones I'm not afraid to loose.

For the most part it's been just me, with hospice available during the day and can be called any time I need. However within the past 2 weeks a friend of his and our roommate have really stepped up and I have so much respect and appreciation for them. It makes it easier to know that someone is there if I need.

Still waiting . . . .

luz del lago's picture
luz del lago
Posts: 452
Joined: Jul 2010

April, I am keeping watch with you. Praying that Patrick is in comfort and peace. Praying for your strength and courage.

Lucy

neverquit
Posts: 221
Joined: Oct 2010

April, there are many of us here waiting and watching with you. It is obvious that you and Patrick were meant to be together as soul mates. You know you are doing all the right things. I am very glad that your friend and roommate have stepped up for you; this makes a huge difference. I still don't know how anyone can do this journey alone. May you and Patrick have peace and know that your love will endure forever. I'm praying for you both.
Dina

3Mana
Posts: 829
Joined: Aug 2010

April,
I am so glad that a friend of Patricks and roommate have stepped in to give you a hand. You've been going through so much and you still keep your sense of humor. Has Patrick been eating much at all? Even though he can be stubborn, I'm sure he appreciates everything you're doing for him. Hope he isn't suffering.
Please try to take a little time for yourself if you can. I'll be thinking of you and praying for Patrick. "Carole"

skipper85's picture
skipper85
Posts: 231
Joined: Sep 2010

Your sense of humor will help you a lot these next few weeks. It's probably one of the ways you cope. You're very strong but try not to hold back your emotions too much. I know you have an all consuming job taking care of Pat. Try and find a little time at least each day just to take care of you. We're all here for you April. You're not alone. Many of us have gone down the same road. So know that we truly know what you're your feeling right now. My prayers are for Pat to find peace soon and for you to be able to accept what God has planned for both of you. I have the greatest admiration for you and the wonderful job you're doing taking care of your husband.

(((LOVE & HUGS)))

Skipper

luz del lago's picture
luz del lago
Posts: 452
Joined: Jul 2010

April, you are both in my thoughts and prayers. I am with you, in spirit and heart.

Lucy

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