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yesyes2
Posts: 461
Joined: Jul 2009

Hi Guys,

Okay, the past 2 months have been not so wonderful. I had mentioned that my beloved brother in law passed away from cancer, and his memorial was 2 weeks ago. My sister is having a very difficult time. His birthday would have been Christmas Eve.

Today is the anniversary of my other sister's death in 1997, always a sad day for me. She hated winter and died on the first day of winter from cancer too.

My RA is very active, have had some very bad flairs. I had a Rituxan treatment last week for it but takes several weeks for the benifits to show. My Reumatologist allowed me to be in pain, untreated, as it got worse and worse, for 4 wks. I've had this doc for 23 yrs but it looks like time to look for a new one. Will have another Retixan treatment this coming Monday. Will get 1,000ccs this time. That is a lot and am a little nervous about it. Always hard to go back into OOU for treatments.

I had my CT scans last week and got the results today. Mostly they are good. My onc feels I'm still in remission. However, don't you just hate those howevers, my spleen didn't look right on the scan. He ordered an ultrasound but hospital can't do it until January. So I get to worry and wait. The report said it looks like it could be my lymphoma recurring, my onc thinks not. Let's hope it's not as I just finished chemo in February 2010, and that would be really really bad.

Now last but not least........my cat was diagnosed yesterday with lymphoma of the intestines and spleen. He has an enlarged spleen and large nodes around his stomach and intestines. Sue, you'll love this, he's now on daily preds for the rest of his life.....I am not LOL about doing this to him. He was flying yesterday, hungry and off the walls. They want to do a needle biopsy and give him CHOP chem. I can't believe my cat has the same disease as me and in the same location. And being offered the same treatment I just finished. It makes me sick just thinking about it. Guys I just can't watch my cat die from the same illness that I have and I just don't know what to do. My heart is breaking for him. Any help, assistance, ideas will be greatly appreciated. The outcome is very bleak for NEO.

I just really want a break from cancer. But than I think we all do. I've been so on overdrive that I havn't had much time, energy or resources to give much back but know I love you all and admire all your strength and compassion.

Thanks for bearing with me and taking the time to read this very long post. Prayers and assist. will be appreciated.

Blessings to you,
Leslie

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

Leslie,
it has been a rough time for you lately thats for sure.This lymphoma stuff takes a constant toll on us. I hope your lymphoma has not flared back up again. it is hard waiting to find out results. I know exactly how that feels. Then to hear your kitty has been diagnoses with the same thing. What was your diagnoses to begin with? I should write this stuff down, but never think to do it. I keep forgetting the memory is about shot. I left a post yesterday about a chemical that is in our drinking water and more than likely is causing us a lot of these problems. I am sure you will read it. It is disgusting they let this crap go on like this. We all wind up suffering in one way or the other for it. It seems like the holidays bring out a lot of sadness in people when they think about the people that are no longer around to enjoy the time with us. I know it does me. Hang in and keep us posted. We are all a family here. JOHN(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

Leslie,
it has been a rough time for you lately thats for sure.This lymphoma stuff takes a constant toll on us. I hope your lymphoma has not flared back up again. it is hard waiting to find out results. I know exactly how that feels. Then to hear your kitty has been diagnoses with the same thing. What was your diagnoses to begin with? I should write this stuff down, but never think to do it. I keep forgetting the memory is about shot. I left a post yesterday about a chemical that is in our drinking water and more than likely is causing us a lot of these problems. I am sure you will read it. It is disgusting they let this crap go on like this. We all wind up suffering in one way or the other for it. It seems like the holidays bring out a lot of sadness in people when they think about the people that are no longer around to enjoy the time with us. I know it does me. Hang in and keep us posted. We are all a family here. JOHN(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

Leslie,
it has been a rough time for you lately thats for sure.This lymphoma stuff takes a constant toll on us. I hope your lymphoma has not flared back up again. it is hard waiting to find out results. I know exactly how that feels. Then to hear your kitty has been diagnoses with the same thing. What was your diagnoses to begin with? I should write this stuff down, but never think to do it. I keep forgetting the memory is about shot. I left a post yesterday about a chemical that is in our drinking water and more than likely is causing us a lot of these problems. I am sure you will read it. It is disgusting they let this crap go on like this. We all wind up suffering in one way or the other for it. It seems like the holidays bring out a lot of sadness in people when they think about the people that are no longer around to enjoy the time with us. I know it does me. Hang in and keep us posted. We are all a family here. JOHN(FNHL-1-4A-5/10)

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

SORRY ABOUT THE MULTIPLE POSTS. i DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT.JOHN

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

SORRY ABOUT THE MULTIPLE POSTS. i DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT.JOHN

COBRA666's picture
COBRA666
Posts: 2418
Joined: May 2010

SORRY ABOUT THE MULTIPLE POSTS. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT.JOHN

yesyes2
Posts: 461
Joined: Jul 2009

John,

So sorry about the multiple posts, but like Mary it does make me laugh and smile when I see them.

Thanks for replying to me post and giving such kind words. Neo is hanging in there although the preds are doing their thing to him.

I am schd. for an abdominal ultra sound to look at my spleen on Jan 5, 2011. I really don't want to battle this again. My diagnosis is immuno-suppressed lymphoproliferative disease, agressive and very very rare, 200 to 400 cases yearly. I had both B and T cell involvement. First time stage 3A, recurrance either stage 1A or 2A. LPD is not graded so don't know that.

Have a healthy and happy holiday,
Leslie

allmost60's picture
allmost60
Posts: 3172
Joined: Jul 2010

Hi Leslie,
One word for your post..."WOW"! I am so sorry! When people say.."God doesn't give us more than we can handle"...I always think to myself...tell that to Lisha,Leslie,Liz,Vinny and so many more!When I read about Neo having to be on prednisone I said.."OH NO"!!! Poor baby!!! My heart goes out to you Leslie...truely! I pray your scan on Jan 5th does NOT show a recurrance and I'll definetely be keeping positive thoughts for you, and poor Neo. I hope you can try to be calm over the holidays and find a little enjoyment.
God bless you dear Leslie....Love...Sue (FNHL-2-3A-6/10)

yesyes2
Posts: 461
Joined: Jul 2009

Thanks Sue for your kind words and positive thoughts. I'm going tomorrow to speak with a veterinary(sp) oncologist about possible chemo for NEO or doing nothing. I'm trying to appease my guilty feelings about thinking about not treating. It really is an impossible situation to think about giving a poor creature the poison we just went through. I'll let you know what he says. My poor husband, who has never cared for cats loves this little guy to death. But doesn't think we can afford to go the chemo route.

Sue I really appreciate your humor, wisdom and kind gentle heart and always look forward to reading your posts.

Love to you and yours,
Leslie

vinny59's picture
vinny59
Posts: 1030
Joined: Nov 2006

So sorry about Neo, it just is one more burden for you...... just love him as much as you can and keep him comfortable. I hope everything works out for you on your next scan, waiting as we all know is the hardest part! Stay as upbeat as you can....... Vinny

dixiegirl's picture
dixiegirl
Posts: 1043
Joined: Apr 2006

My heart goes out to you honey. I know how hard it is not to be able to do all we can for our babies. It broke my heart when we lost Pogo and I miss her daily. I truly wish we'd had the money to do the surgery, but at the same time I just can't convince myself that her quality of life of would have been the best.

Time does heal, and memories last a lifetime. I remember so much of Pogo and her being such a drama queen, but I have to admit...Sam is running a close second :)

Take care, and know that I am thinking of you. I too lost my mother on December 18th and this time of year is so hard. Cancer sucks!

Beth

yesyes2
Posts: 461
Joined: Jul 2009

Thanks Vinny and Beth for your very kind words. I certainly will hold Neo close and love him for as long as we have him. He actually is feeling better because of the preds, and he looks better and has gained some weight. Just sad that that can't last for a long time.
I know that time does heal us and our memories are what gets us through the long haul. Just so very sad right now. We are going to do a needle aspiration on Tuesday to see if they can identify if his Lymphoma is the type that can respond well to chemo. If it is we will probably do some chemo, if not we will see.

I'm think positive Vinny about the ultra sound. Not going to fret until I have something to fret about.

Hope your Christmas were all you hoped they would be.
Leslie

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