Nov 15, 2010 - 8:22 am
Hi..My mom was diagnosed in March with stage 1 rectum cancer.She had a mass so she received radiation and chemo everyday for 2 months.The doctors were so positive they could fix it. Then a few months later around June she started with this cough...make a long horrible story short they found many huge masses in her lungs,pelvic area..and said there was no more they could do.no she wasnt a smoker either.So she died on October 29th the day before my little sisters 18th bday.for the past three nights I feel like my 2 little kids crawl in bed with me then i open my eyes and they arent there.Do you think Im dreaming or could it be my mum hugging me? Im so mad about this.Im cranky,miserable,I try to be happy for my kids and sometimes I can but then I just dont care or something..cant help it.I dont have anyone I can talk to. The worst part is I had to move to another state before she died..I visited her twice since august well once when she was still alive.But the worst is my dad and my sis are all the way in Florida(in my mums home she died in)and Im here in Massachusetts.Everyday I wake up and my chest feels so heavy.I try to think positive and thankful foy mt 2 little healthy ones but Im not happy and I feel guilty but Im pissed.Help me someone please..