Nov 04, 2010 - 1:07 am
I'm Toni and in Feb 2008, I was Dx'd with stage IV vulvar cancer with bilateral lymph node involvement. 10 days later, I had a radical vulvectomy and sentinal node resection. I had 7 hot nodes. Once that healed up, I had 6 weeks of radiation with prophylactic chemo.
I suppose what has brought me here is that I'm now having some real issues with self esteem and the fear of spending my life alone because I don't want to be some freak show for someone. Trust is absolutely imperative and I just don't know how I can find myself trusting enough to be with someone again.
How do you explain to a potential new relationship "Oh btw, I resemble a baby doll down there.... you know... flat then a hole. And don't pay any mind to the zipper scar that's right there where my *button* is supposed to be".
Is there anyone around here that's been through this? The man that I thought I could trust, isn't going to be there anymore and he swears that it's not an issue but I just can't see another man being able to deal with the issues that come with it.