Sep 25, 2010 - 8:14 pm
This is my first post on here. My mom was diagnosed two weeks ago with melanoma that spread to her lung and brain. She had two radiation treatments and decided to stop treatment and receive hospice care at home. She is 81 years old and is living with my dad who is taking care of her.
What is unnerving is that she is relatively symptom free. My concern today might seem a little petty in the scheme of things, but here goes:
She has decided that she is going to take one Imodium pill every day. She is scared to death of having an accident in bed. Now she is complaining of nausea and my dad said she does not have an appetite and is not eating anything but the protein shakes I bought her.
I am assuming that her nausea and loss of appetite are related to the daily Imodium, but it might be symptoms from the brain tumors too. She has never been one to go to doctors - she never had a mammogram and never had a primary care doctor. I believe she knows her body and what is right for her. When she was beginning the radiation and Temodar, I read in the paperwork that if she got diarrhea, we should not use over the counter medications to treat it, but to contact the cancer center nurse for assistance.
It is hard for me to just let her do whatever she wants under the excuse of, "I'm going to be dead in six months anyway." I get that, but I still want her quality of life to be as good as possible. The doctor was clear that the radiation would not extend her life but would just manage the inevitable neurological symptoms. She said it was a waste of her last months to be sick from the radiation.
I am torn about just ignoring this issue, let her have the automony that she's earned, and not say or do anything about the Imodium use. I already feel completely useless and out of control. I imagine she is feeling the same way, out of control of what is happening to her. Who am I to try to control this little area of her life?
So I am asking this group: what would you do? Do I have any reason to be concerned? Should I just let it go?