Frustrated

Options
imagineit2010
imagineit2010 Member Posts: 152 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
What is wrong with people? I was diagnosed 11 months ago. At 46 I'm still considered young for this proving it can touch anyone. I've talked to over forty friends and family about this and how important early detection is. In every case they ask, "how did you find out"? I tell them I was lucky with my symptoms and that many times there are no symptoms until later stages. They always sound concerned. So, I've kept track and NOT ONE person has gone to get checked or even made an appointment. Not even my two older brothers or three older sisters. I feel like the weather man in New Orleans telling people a storm was on the way.
I know you can lead a horse to water but, man, I was hoping someone might benefit from my drawing a short straw.
Just frustrating.........
«1

Comments

  • lisa42
    lisa42 Member Posts: 3,625 Member
    Options
    yes, it's frustrating
    I know what you mean. After my diagnosis at age 41, my husband and two sisters in law had colonoscopies and were all okay. My brother, however, refuses to get a colonoscopy. I know of several others as well, who would just rather bury their heads. My brother has no insurance and says if he found out he had cancer, he'd never be able to afford to get any treatment anyhow. It is a sad situation.
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    Options
    Knowing
    I wanted to get checked two years ago. I told my Aunt whom I'm close too, that I think I'm dying. But I told her as well, I couldn't go to the ER with the feeling that all wasn't right with me, and I think I'm dying.
    I didn't have insurance, my husband had lost his job.
    Only when the pain got intense could I go to the ER. Stage IV cancer. That was my reason for not going sooner.
    I now own a t-shirt that I had made, it says 50? Get Colonoscopy.
    May not help but one person to go and get one, but maybe in my own way I can save a life, when I can't even save mine.
  • herdizziness
    herdizziness Member Posts: 3,624 Member
    Options
    Knowing
    I wanted to get checked two years ago. I told my Aunt whom I'm close too, that I think I'm dying. But I told her as well, I couldn't go to the ER with the feeling that all wasn't right with me, and I think I'm dying, what kind of excuse was that to go to the ER. Knock, knock, hello? I have a bad feeling all isn't right with me, so can you do some x-rays or cat scans and see if I'm okay? Wouldn't happen.
    I didn't have insurance, my husband had lost his job.
    Only when the pain got intense could I go to the ER, it was a good excuse. Stage IV cancer.
    I now own a t-shirt that I had made, it says 50? Get Colonoscopy.
    May not help but one person to go and get one, but maybe in my own way I can save a life, when I can't even save mine.
  • PGLGreg
    PGLGreg Member Posts: 731
    Options
    What are the chances that a
    What are the chances that a first screening colonoscopy at age 50 is going to turn up a cancer? Pretty low, I imagine. It's expensive, and the prep is a pain. I don't think it's so hard to understand why people don't get around to it. But I did convince both my wife and sister to have colonoscopies.

    --Greg
  • HollyID
    HollyID Member Posts: 946 Member
    Options
    Yep, know that feeling...
    I have eight siblings. I think four had gone in before me to be screened. Our dad died of CC, so it was a given that we needed to be checked early, right?

    Out of the four, all had polyps. I went in for a screening because of my family history. No signs or symptoms of anything wrong. I end up with stage III cancer. LOL

    Now, getting the other four in for their screenings was like pulling teeth. One brother actually waited until he was 50 and frankly, I think he was tired of me bitching to him about getting it done. He told me I was a bigger nag than his wife. (his wife was standing right there and she is FAR from a nag) Anyway... he had 12 polyps when he finally went in. One they couldn't quite grab and said they would get later. He was excited when the doc told him to come back in ten years. Then he remembered our family history and told him he'd see him in two. I laugh. Even my little brother went in earlier than him.

    I have no idea why people wait. I'm just very thankful that no other siblings have to go through what we've been through. I still preach to family and friends. You obviously don't have to have signs or symptoms to get cancer. I'm the living proof of that one. :)

    Love and Hugs,

    Holly
  • HollyID said:

    Yep, know that feeling...
    I have eight siblings. I think four had gone in before me to be screened. Our dad died of CC, so it was a given that we needed to be checked early, right?

    Out of the four, all had polyps. I went in for a screening because of my family history. No signs or symptoms of anything wrong. I end up with stage III cancer. LOL

    Now, getting the other four in for their screenings was like pulling teeth. One brother actually waited until he was 50 and frankly, I think he was tired of me bitching to him about getting it done. He told me I was a bigger nag than his wife. (his wife was standing right there and she is FAR from a nag) Anyway... he had 12 polyps when he finally went in. One they couldn't quite grab and said they would get later. He was excited when the doc told him to come back in ten years. Then he remembered our family history and told him he'd see him in two. I laugh. Even my little brother went in earlier than him.

    I have no idea why people wait. I'm just very thankful that no other siblings have to go through what we've been through. I still preach to family and friends. You obviously don't have to have signs or symptoms to get cancer. I'm the living proof of that one. :)

    Love and Hugs,

    Holly

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    Options
    unknown said:

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator

    It was March 25th at work...
    I was diagnosed with Colon Cancer in Cancer Awareness month, and all of the people at work (about 300) saw how easily it can hit home. I was yes a poster child for cancer. Almost half of the work populace said they had the screening done after my diagnosis. 3 had pre-cancerous polyps and had them removed. They found bladder cancer in one (and he seems to be getting along ok so far) they also found one that has it in his abdominal wall, kidneys, pancreas, stomach...he has since retired...I didn't ask people to do it, it simply hit home and rollercoastered into a barrage of employees getting checked. I openly talk about it daily, openly show the ones that want to see my ostomy bag, and tell them about having my backside sewn shut. I tell them about not being able to do things that a married man should be able to do. I have opened up my whole life to try and help anyone, be it patient or caregiver on how to go about getting through the mental and physical aspects of this disease. and if none of that works, then I tell em like I told a man in Nashville Tuesday at my pre op appt " If you don't give a damn about yourself then do it for your children"....His words were and I quote "Do you believe in God" I told him yes, and also told him he didn't have to whisper..he then said "All I needed was a little push"...Well, whether he does or whether he don't at least he was sincere when I left. The rest is up to him. I have learned not to badger about it, only to leave the seed and the door open if anyone wants to know more. It has served to be well received, and hopefully maybe save a life.........

    Don't be frustrated.......just be diligent and patient.......Love to ya, Buzz
  • Patteee
    Patteee Member Posts: 945
    Options
    I have 4 siblings- one, my
    I have 4 siblings- one, my twin went in the same week I was dx'd, no polyps. 3 other siblings- I swear they just could not imagine themselves as authors of this story, it was like the denial was so thick. My youngest sib, my brother, was told by his doctor at age 47 to absolutely have a colonoscopy. And they found 3 polyps that were all pre-cancerous. My mother, who had been with me my whole treatment time said, "wow, he didn't even have any symptoms!" YES YES YES that is the nature of this fricken beast- you have the polyps removed when they are just little hangers-on in the colon, BEFORE they grow into problems. To me, it is a no-brainer. Unfortunately, lots and lots of people have no brains when it comes to this.

    The other very real point, I think people are mortified over having a colonoscopy. Lets face it, nobody likes having a camera stuck up their butt. How do you rid this issue of the social stigma that goes with it? From taking a poop, to f*rting- people are just way too polite or phobic about it. It is like we need to tackle the body issue and deal with, "nobody is sticking something up my ****" issue. Cripes, colonoscopy and having something stuck up one's butt is NOT AN ISSUE, it is the CANCER that is the issue!
  • imagineit2010
    imagineit2010 Member Posts: 152 Member
    Options
    PGLGreg said:

    What are the chances that a
    What are the chances that a first screening colonoscopy at age 50 is going to turn up a cancer? Pretty low, I imagine. It's expensive, and the prep is a pain. I don't think it's so hard to understand why people don't get around to it. But I did convince both my wife and sister to have colonoscopies.

    --Greg

    Good job, Greg

    Good job, Greg
  • imagineit2010
    imagineit2010 Member Posts: 152 Member
    Options
    Buzzard said:

    It was March 25th at work...
    I was diagnosed with Colon Cancer in Cancer Awareness month, and all of the people at work (about 300) saw how easily it can hit home. I was yes a poster child for cancer. Almost half of the work populace said they had the screening done after my diagnosis. 3 had pre-cancerous polyps and had them removed. They found bladder cancer in one (and he seems to be getting along ok so far) they also found one that has it in his abdominal wall, kidneys, pancreas, stomach...he has since retired...I didn't ask people to do it, it simply hit home and rollercoastered into a barrage of employees getting checked. I openly talk about it daily, openly show the ones that want to see my ostomy bag, and tell them about having my backside sewn shut. I tell them about not being able to do things that a married man should be able to do. I have opened up my whole life to try and help anyone, be it patient or caregiver on how to go about getting through the mental and physical aspects of this disease. and if none of that works, then I tell em like I told a man in Nashville Tuesday at my pre op appt " If you don't give a damn about yourself then do it for your children"....His words were and I quote "Do you believe in God" I told him yes, and also told him he didn't have to whisper..he then said "All I needed was a little push"...Well, whether he does or whether he don't at least he was sincere when I left. The rest is up to him. I have learned not to badger about it, only to leave the seed and the door open if anyone wants to know more. It has served to be well received, and hopefully maybe save a life.........

    Don't be frustrated.......just be diligent and patient.......Love to ya, Buzz

    Great job Buzz. I think most
    Great job Buzz. I think most people really don't take it serious until someone is at death's door and they look like a cancer patient. I look healthy, I'm still working full time and I haven't lost my pooper yet so it doesn't seem that serious to some. I feel like making a shirt with all the screen names of people on here that have passed away in the last year. The shirt would list all the names and say "These are the friends I've lost to colorectal cancer THIS year, have you been checked yet?" Then I would wear it to family functions and get-togethers. That might get people's attention, but I wouldn't want to be a downer.
  • okthen
    okthen Member Posts: 232
    Options
    Patteee said:

    I have 4 siblings- one, my
    I have 4 siblings- one, my twin went in the same week I was dx'd, no polyps. 3 other siblings- I swear they just could not imagine themselves as authors of this story, it was like the denial was so thick. My youngest sib, my brother, was told by his doctor at age 47 to absolutely have a colonoscopy. And they found 3 polyps that were all pre-cancerous. My mother, who had been with me my whole treatment time said, "wow, he didn't even have any symptoms!" YES YES YES that is the nature of this fricken beast- you have the polyps removed when they are just little hangers-on in the colon, BEFORE they grow into problems. To me, it is a no-brainer. Unfortunately, lots and lots of people have no brains when it comes to this.

    The other very real point, I think people are mortified over having a colonoscopy. Lets face it, nobody likes having a camera stuck up their butt. How do you rid this issue of the social stigma that goes with it? From taking a poop, to f*rting- people are just way too polite or phobic about it. It is like we need to tackle the body issue and deal with, "nobody is sticking something up my ****" issue. Cripes, colonoscopy and having something stuck up one's butt is NOT AN ISSUE, it is the CANCER that is the issue!

    My husband was laid off from
    My husband was laid off from his job at 61 y.o. The ONLY reason he went in was because we would be losing our insurance. VERY shocked to find out he had a mass....and Im a nurse! I never felt so stupid in my life. Now we are at the end of our COBRA coverage right as he needs to start chemo. I still can't convince my mother that she should get checked for colorectal cancer or breast cancer even though my aunt is going through chemo for breast cancer as we speak. it is very frustrating, I tell everyone I can to get checked, DH had no symptoms and even though him losing his job has been devastating, it probably saved his life.
  • Joy1216
    Joy1216 Member Posts: 290 Member
    Options
    Procrastinated
    I had heard horror stories about the prep, so I waited until I retired at age 56 to have my first screening colonoscopy. (This was in spite of the fact that one of my close friends died of colon cancer in 1993). Surprise! You have colon cancer. Who me? I have no symptoms. I can't have colon cancer. I don't have a family history of colon cancer. I can't have colon cancer. But I did. Fortunately, mine was caught very early and 4 1/2 years later I am still cancer-free. I tell my story to everyone I meet. I've succeeded in getting numerous people to get colonoscopies. Several scheduled colonoscopies while I was still in the hospital from my resection surgery. No one has been diagnosed with cancer, but several have had pre-cancerous polyps. I'll keep on telling my story.
    Joy
  • SandyL
    SandyL Member Posts: 218
    Options
    Joy1216 said:

    Procrastinated
    I had heard horror stories about the prep, so I waited until I retired at age 56 to have my first screening colonoscopy. (This was in spite of the fact that one of my close friends died of colon cancer in 1993). Surprise! You have colon cancer. Who me? I have no symptoms. I can't have colon cancer. I don't have a family history of colon cancer. I can't have colon cancer. But I did. Fortunately, mine was caught very early and 4 1/2 years later I am still cancer-free. I tell my story to everyone I meet. I've succeeded in getting numerous people to get colonoscopies. Several scheduled colonoscopies while I was still in the hospital from my resection surgery. No one has been diagnosed with cancer, but several have had pre-cancerous polyps. I'll keep on telling my story.
    Joy

    There is no better directive
    than to hear "come back in 10 years for another colonoscopy". However, my DH did not get that one. Instead he got CC stage III. It's so easy to get the scope and I have begged our children to get theirs. They have done so and I feel so much better knowing that they are being proactive about their health. But friends of ours, just refuse to get one. Too invasive, too busy, I'm healthy, blah blah, blah. No excuse not to have one is good enough, especially if you get the diagnosis my DH got.
    Sandy
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    Options
    You can lead a horse to water, but not an A$$ it seems
    Not to call your friends and family names, but WTF??? I was diagnosed at 46 (stage IV colon cancer). Within about 1 month, I was responsible for having over a dozen family members and friends get colonoscopies. Since then, probably another 20 people had them knowing my situation. Luckily, everyone checked out OK. A few polyps but nothing else. I had no symptoms to speak of. An "unusual" BM here and there that I blew off to Mexican food or something like that. No blockage, I felt fantastic, tons of energy, no blood or anything. It was caught by a routine physical and elevated liver functions.

    I do not know why it still surprises me that I hear stories like this. Not to be rude, but maybe they have their heads so far up "there" that they had a look around and saw they are A-OK. Don't they get it? Do you look like you are having a lot of fun or something? I've wondered if this is some sort of regional thing at times. Certain people live in certain areas where the way of thinking is so foreign to me and everyone I know.
    Same planet, different worlds I guess...

    You can only do what you can do. Like you said, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him get a colonoscopy
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    Options
    PGLGreg said:

    What are the chances that a
    What are the chances that a first screening colonoscopy at age 50 is going to turn up a cancer? Pretty low, I imagine. It's expensive, and the prep is a pain. I don't think it's so hard to understand why people don't get around to it. But I did convince both my wife and sister to have colonoscopies.

    --Greg

    Except
    that cancer often runs in families. If one person has it, there's a good chance the genes are there and everyone is at risk. Mine was found through blood work and there was no genetic propensity for me to get a colonoscopy. I find it very hard to understand that if a family member has cancer, and cancer is often genetic, that they would not RUN to get tested. What you don't know can't hurt you, it can only kill you.
  • Erinb
    Erinb Member Posts: 293
    Options
    yep
    My husband was only 35 and his brother refuses to get a colonoscopy. Early detection would be so much better than detecting it at stage 4. I hear your frustration.
    Erin
  • Kathryn_in_MN
    Kathryn_in_MN Member Posts: 1,252 Member
    Options
    I've had much better luck
    After my diagnosis, my brother and sister, both younger than me were scoped. My sister was clear. My brother had pre-cancerous polyps. Who knows, in a few years he could have been in my shoes - with colon cancer before age 50 when we are advised to get our first scope.

    My father-in-law made his appointment for his overdue scope. He'd had a few before, but due to a scheduling screw-up he didn't have one the prior year as he was supposed to. He's had pre-cancerous polyps in the past.

    My husband turned 50 BEFORE my dx, but kept putting off getting his done. His doctor tried to get it scheduled, but that was a month before his birthday, so he said he'd wait and schedule it AFTER he was 50. Well, he didn't schedule. I was on his case during my treatment. He saw how awful things were for me. But he still wouldn't go, saying we couldn't both be that sick at the same time if they did find anything. Finally towards the end of my chemo I called and made the appointment for him on my off-week. He had 3 small flat polyps removed - pre-cancerous, and the type most likely to turn malignant. But he also had some weird mucousy things - two across from each other - that the GI dr couldn't figure out. So they biopsied. They turned out to be strange polyps, made up of both the cells that don't ever turn to cancer, and cells that can turn. He had to get a second colonoscopy to remove them. That was better than needing surgery to remove them because they'd already turned malignant. There is a very good chance that he would have been obstructed because of the growth of the two polyps across from each other, or that he would have ended up with colon cancer soon, if he hadn't had them removed now.

    Many of my friends have turned 50 or are over 50. Several got their first colonoscopies, and others scheduled their repeats after my dx. A lot of people that would never have gotten them finally did. Any time anyone asked me what they could do to help me, I said "Go get your colonoscopy." More than anything else, it helps me deal with my dx when I know it might be what has saved others.

    I too would be very frustrated if none of my family or friends got scoped after my dx. A few were a bit resistant, but I rode their butts till they did it! They knew they'd have no peace and I would lay the guilt trips on them, till they got in and had their scopes.
  • PhillieG said:

    You can lead a horse to water, but not an A$$ it seems
    Not to call your friends and family names, but WTF??? I was diagnosed at 46 (stage IV colon cancer). Within about 1 month, I was responsible for having over a dozen family members and friends get colonoscopies. Since then, probably another 20 people had them knowing my situation. Luckily, everyone checked out OK. A few polyps but nothing else. I had no symptoms to speak of. An "unusual" BM here and there that I blew off to Mexican food or something like that. No blockage, I felt fantastic, tons of energy, no blood or anything. It was caught by a routine physical and elevated liver functions.

    I do not know why it still surprises me that I hear stories like this. Not to be rude, but maybe they have their heads so far up "there" that they had a look around and saw they are A-OK. Don't they get it? Do you look like you are having a lot of fun or something? I've wondered if this is some sort of regional thing at times. Certain people live in certain areas where the way of thinking is so foreign to me and everyone I know.
    Same planet, different worlds I guess...

    You can only do what you can do. Like you said, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him get a colonoscopy

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Nana b
    Nana b Member Posts: 3,030 Member
    Options

    I've had much better luck
    After my diagnosis, my brother and sister, both younger than me were scoped. My sister was clear. My brother had pre-cancerous polyps. Who knows, in a few years he could have been in my shoes - with colon cancer before age 50 when we are advised to get our first scope.

    My father-in-law made his appointment for his overdue scope. He'd had a few before, but due to a scheduling screw-up he didn't have one the prior year as he was supposed to. He's had pre-cancerous polyps in the past.

    My husband turned 50 BEFORE my dx, but kept putting off getting his done. His doctor tried to get it scheduled, but that was a month before his birthday, so he said he'd wait and schedule it AFTER he was 50. Well, he didn't schedule. I was on his case during my treatment. He saw how awful things were for me. But he still wouldn't go, saying we couldn't both be that sick at the same time if they did find anything. Finally towards the end of my chemo I called and made the appointment for him on my off-week. He had 3 small flat polyps removed - pre-cancerous, and the type most likely to turn malignant. But he also had some weird mucousy things - two across from each other - that the GI dr couldn't figure out. So they biopsied. They turned out to be strange polyps, made up of both the cells that don't ever turn to cancer, and cells that can turn. He had to get a second colonoscopy to remove them. That was better than needing surgery to remove them because they'd already turned malignant. There is a very good chance that he would have been obstructed because of the growth of the two polyps across from each other, or that he would have ended up with colon cancer soon, if he hadn't had them removed now.

    Many of my friends have turned 50 or are over 50. Several got their first colonoscopies, and others scheduled their repeats after my dx. A lot of people that would never have gotten them finally did. Any time anyone asked me what they could do to help me, I said "Go get your colonoscopy." More than anything else, it helps me deal with my dx when I know it might be what has saved others.

    I too would be very frustrated if none of my family or friends got scoped after my dx. A few were a bit resistant, but I rode their butts till they did it! They knew they'd have no peace and I would lay the guilt trips on them, till they got in and had their scopes.

    Thank Goodness@
    All my 8 siblings have gone in for a colonoscopy and my daughters have appointments.
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
    Options
    PhillieG said:

    You can lead a horse to water, but not an A$$ it seems
    Not to call your friends and family names, but WTF??? I was diagnosed at 46 (stage IV colon cancer). Within about 1 month, I was responsible for having over a dozen family members and friends get colonoscopies. Since then, probably another 20 people had them knowing my situation. Luckily, everyone checked out OK. A few polyps but nothing else. I had no symptoms to speak of. An "unusual" BM here and there that I blew off to Mexican food or something like that. No blockage, I felt fantastic, tons of energy, no blood or anything. It was caught by a routine physical and elevated liver functions.

    I do not know why it still surprises me that I hear stories like this. Not to be rude, but maybe they have their heads so far up "there" that they had a look around and saw they are A-OK. Don't they get it? Do you look like you are having a lot of fun or something? I've wondered if this is some sort of regional thing at times. Certain people live in certain areas where the way of thinking is so foreign to me and everyone I know.
    Same planet, different worlds I guess...

    You can only do what you can do. Like you said, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him get a colonoscopy

    Phil, too funny!
    I love the comment "maybe they have their heads so far up there that they had a look around and saw they are A-OK"! I may hve to borrow that comment.