Jul 02, 2010 - 11:43 am
First I have to say it again I am truely taken back by all the support and love on this site. I have been a nurse for 20 years and involved with RFL and The Breast Cancer 3-day for several years. Now instead of sending one of my patients home or to another hospital with cancer I have to deal with it hands on with my mother.
I hadn't seen my mom in about 6 months but when I first saw her I knew there was something really wrong and had suspected she had cancer. She told me she was putting off going to the doctor until Aug. because that is when she would get her Medicare. That was about 1 month ago. I got a call last Saturday that my brother had taken her to the hospital because she couldn't breathe. Yes she did have a heart attack, fluid around the lungs and heart, PE and after several other tests cancer. She was told there are tumors on the liver, both kidneys, overies, uterus and colon. Since we have been told that it is primary ovarian cancer type IV. The doctors have started to give her all the options but I don't know what she will decide she is now having the doctors call me directly since she doesn't understand most of what the have told her. Although most options are only pallative at this point. Things have progressed way to far.
I updated my brother and he flat out said that he can't care for her (he and his wife have been living with her). I knew he wouldn't do it so I have now opened my house up and are about to start moving her things in. Mom doesn't know any of this and I'm not to sure how to tell her that her son and his family won't care for her. She is still in the hospital. There has been some talk about hospice but I want to let things soak in one step at a time. I did go against her wishes and spoke to her best friend that live many states away and told her what was going on. I really need to know am I taking this too far. How do I let her know and fill in all the blanks without making her feel worse?
Any advice would be great I could use the help!