whats wrong with me?

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teresa340
teresa340 Member Posts: 8
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
whats wrong with me some days I feel strong,but there are days that I cant stop crying.I cant be alone that,when Im with my family Im like Im okay laugh,go out for dinner or just watch tv. but give me some time alone and I loose it,I realy try so hard to control myself but the tears just come out. whats wrong with me should I get some profecional help?

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  • natly15
    natly15 Member Posts: 1,941
    #2
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    When I was doing chemo I'd
    When I was doing chemo I'd have those teary eyed days and was also short of temper on a few occasions. For me it was the exhuastion, general malaise from the chemo and probably the emotional part of realizing I was dealing with BC.

    Speak to your onc about this. There is usually a social worker available at the cancer treatment center. After consulting with them, you may find that an anti depressant would be helpful. Of course there is as you suggested always the possibility of getting professional help and joining a breast cancer support group.

    We are not dealing with a cold we are dealing with heavy duty treatment and a serious invader of our bodies. We all react differently and many of us do take meds to help us thru. You are very normal for this abnormal condition. Hugs to you.
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
    #3
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    Teresa
    There is nothing wrong with you. Once durning Chemo I had a melt down in the cancer center. It just came on, could not get it under control. This happened at home,in the car, in the shower ( which happen's to be the best place for me to cry ). As time goes by it does get better. I don't think it will ever be like it was before the Dx, but it does get a bit better, not cring all the time. Sometimes I have cancer free days which to me means I did not think about having cancer at all that day. Hang in there HUGS
  • teresa340
    teresa340 Member Posts: 8
    #4
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    natly15 said:

    When I was doing chemo I'd
    When I was doing chemo I'd have those teary eyed days and was also short of temper on a few occasions. For me it was the exhuastion, general malaise from the chemo and probably the emotional part of realizing I was dealing with BC.

    Speak to your onc about this. There is usually a social worker available at the cancer treatment center. After consulting with them, you may find that an anti depressant would be helpful. Of course there is as you suggested always the possibility of getting professional help and joining a breast cancer support group.

    We are not dealing with a cold we are dealing with heavy duty treatment and a serious invader of our bodies. We all react differently and many of us do take meds to help us thru. You are very normal for this abnormal condition. Hugs to you.

    Thank you
    Thank you so much I keeped thinking I going to lose it but Its true it not a cold its BC. Got an appointment for june 14 I do want some help. Geting help from social worker and it realy helps me. on the 14 going to psycologist. maybe he can give me a little push. Thanks natly15
  • heidijez
    heidijez Member Posts: 441
    #5
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    sometimes i think i am the
    sometimes i think i am the only one who cries. . . the women on this board seem so strong and in control. . . i don't cry all day. . .i cry for a minute or two and then i am back in control. . .i am not depressed, i am scared. this is a big deal. . .my life has changed. . .finished chemo and tentative date for mastectomy is may 27. . .and then six weeks of radiation. maybe i am wrong, but i think this a good reason to shed a few tears.

    hang in there, teresa, you will be just fine! (((hugs))
  • carkris
    carkris Member Posts: 4,553 Member
    #6
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    Kat11 said:

    Teresa
    There is nothing wrong with you. Once durning Chemo I had a melt down in the cancer center. It just came on, could not get it under control. This happened at home,in the car, in the shower ( which happen's to be the best place for me to cry ). As time goes by it does get better. I don't think it will ever be like it was before the Dx, but it does get a bit better, not cring all the time. Sometimes I have cancer free days which to me means I did not think about having cancer at all that day. Hang in there HUGS

    your reactions are normal, I
    your reactions are normal, I do see a therapist, but during chemo was only able to talk on the phone as I was too sick to go in most of the time. I cried alot because I felt lousy.(as natly and katt say) sometimes I cant believe this has happened again(my second primary) sometimes I am afraid to be happy as I am afraid the other shoe will drop. but I will deal with whatever as I have dealt with everything else, one day at a time. and grasping onto all the good things in life and trying not to focus on the bad. Its hard. so give yourself alot of credit for being so strong. This is not for wimps.
  • Emilyfimily
    Emilyfimily Member Posts: 141
    #7
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    ((hug))
    Aw, I'd give you a big hug if I were standing in front of you right now. I had some crying days during chemo. I think a lot of it was how so very extremely tired I was, but I felt like I had to just keep going and keep working and keep doing anyway. Probably should have been easier on myself. ..And part of it's because this is scary stuff! Ditto on the 'this isn't for wimps' statement up above. You have a right to do some crying, you know. ((big hugs))
    Hope everything goes well for you! Go easy on yourself, and take care,
    Emilyfimily
  • sparklewings
    sparklewings Member Posts: 29
    #8
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    Emilyfimily said:

    ((hug))
    Aw, I'd give you a big hug if I were standing in front of you right now. I had some crying days during chemo. I think a lot of it was how so very extremely tired I was, but I felt like I had to just keep going and keep working and keep doing anyway. Probably should have been easier on myself. ..And part of it's because this is scary stuff! Ditto on the 'this isn't for wimps' statement up above. You have a right to do some crying, you know. ((big hugs))
    Hope everything goes well for you! Go easy on yourself, and take care,
    Emilyfimily

    My heart goes out to you
    My heart goes out to you hunny! I'm like you, strong, happy, funny in front of friends and family but there are days when wham, i'm in floods. I think we think we have to put on a brave face for everybody else as do not want to distress them but it does them and us good to show it sometimes.

    Do whatever it takes to get you through this hun, there is no right or wrong way! x
  • Mama G
    Mama G Member Posts: 762
    #9
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    sparklewings said:

    My heart goes out to you
    My heart goes out to you hunny! I'm like you, strong, happy, funny in front of friends and family but there are days when wham, i'm in floods. I think we think we have to put on a brave face for everybody else as do not want to distress them but it does them and us good to show it sometimes.

    Do whatever it takes to get you through this hun, there is no right or wrong way! x

    I feel for you, darlin.
    I KNOW I would be going through that if I didn't have the zanax to get me through this. Talk to your doctor about help. Good luck and God bless.
  • 24242
    24242 Member Posts: 1,398
    #10
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    Keep ON
    I am sorry you feel like you do, not having that control can be hard to deal with. Some great advice came my way when I was dealing with all the side effects from treatments. A woman I met who actually was an MD from Russia and became friends while she was battling her own fight with Breast Cancer. She told me that best we can do is NOT be so hard on ourselves. We are often nothing like we were in mind and body after such a fight and often we are mourning our losses and often subconsciously.
    We need to treat ourselve's as we would our own best friend and often we don't think that much of our own selves. Keep it simple can be very calming when our minds can wonder to so many places...
    Be good to yourself always,
    Tara
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #11
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    24242 said:

    Keep ON
    I am sorry you feel like you do, not having that control can be hard to deal with. Some great advice came my way when I was dealing with all the side effects from treatments. A woman I met who actually was an MD from Russia and became friends while she was battling her own fight with Breast Cancer. She told me that best we can do is NOT be so hard on ourselves. We are often nothing like we were in mind and body after such a fight and often we are mourning our losses and often subconsciously.
    We need to treat ourselve's as we would our own best friend and often we don't think that much of our own selves. Keep it simple can be very calming when our minds can wonder to so many places...
    Be good to yourself always,
    Tara

    Great advice, Tara!
    ....and treat our bodies like a loyal old friend, too...it's taking poison for you!

    (Some people actually feel that their bodies have derailed them by getting cancer...I never felt that way).

    When I 'hit the wall', I booked some sessions with the psychologist at my treatment center...she was GREAT! There is no shame in getting support to guide you and just to listen!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • aisling8
    aisling8 Member Posts: 1,627 Member
    #12
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    KathiM said:

    Great advice, Tara!
    ....and treat our bodies like a loyal old friend, too...it's taking poison for you!

    (Some people actually feel that their bodies have derailed them by getting cancer...I never felt that way).

    When I 'hit the wall', I booked some sessions with the psychologist at my treatment center...she was GREAT! There is no shame in getting support to guide you and just to listen!

    Hugs, Kathi

    Nothing
    is wrong with you. You've got feelings. And you're going through tough stuff.

    A big hug to you,

    Victoria
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    #13
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    Teresa, like the others have
    Teresa, like the others have said, this is all very normal. Going through treatments is a tough thing on your mind as well as your body. Continue to let your feeling out and before long, you'll be on here helping the "newbies" get through it all. Stay strong and post often. Take care and sending a BIG (((hug))) your way!!
  • anniem123
    anniem123 Member Posts: 19
    #14
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    Crying
    There is nothing wrong with you. I went through this about 6 weeks ago 2 weeks before my chemo treatments were ready to start. I thought i was loosing it. For 4 days I couldn't stop crying. My regular dr. prescribed an antidepressent for me (after I read that a lot of bc patients got on them). Within 3 days of taking the meds the crying has stopped for the most part. You will still have bad days but keep the faith.
  • greyhoundluvr
    greyhoundluvr Member Posts: 402
    #15
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    Teresa
    Like everyone has said, professional help may be of benefit but please don't feel like there is anything "wrong" with you. Many of us go through the same thing. When we are with our families, we have something to distract us - we also often try to make things easier for them by making things as "normal" as possible. For many weeks, when I was alone at night, I would replay all of the events since I got the first phone call, all of the news that wasn't as good as I had hoped. I got past that but still find that I do the same thing the night before chemo - reliving how I got to this place. I have learned to consciously put this out of my mind and when I focus on the "good" news (that I have a good prognosis if I follow the steps and by doing this, will hopefully be able to watvh my grandson grow up), I am able to relax and be more accepting of what I have to go through to get there. I wish you the best!

    Chris
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
    #16
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    Don't be afraid to ask for help
    I was the same way. I couln't stand the weepy stuff I was doing. My oncologist prescribed lexapro. I'm not pushing meds but it really helped me. FYI, most oncologists avoid paxil because it may increase breast cancer risk. I can honestly say I am enjoying life more and feeling much stronger. Prayers are coming your way!
  • weazer
    weazer Member Posts: 440
    #17
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    CypressCynthia said:

    Don't be afraid to ask for help
    I was the same way. I couln't stand the weepy stuff I was doing. My oncologist prescribed lexapro. I'm not pushing meds but it really helped me. FYI, most oncologists avoid paxil because it may increase breast cancer risk. I can honestly say I am enjoying life more and feeling much stronger. Prayers are coming your way!

    Wow It is now news too me!
    I also had a problenm with chemo...I would cry from the pain so much but the only thing that kept me sain was Paxil...for flashes and anxiety, this is first to hear that it could possibly contribute to my demon!
    Wow, I got on it the year before for depression of losing Five family members with in one year.
    However I quit it, after taking it for a couple of months, but when I found out that I had Triple negative brest cancer, I decided to go back on it for my forced menopause and mood swings...I did want to have my loved ones close buy, I did'nt want to scare them off...Lol.
    I still take it to keep me on a norm. However I will be calling my Doc tomorrow to find out the odds on what I'm taking.
    Thanks for the info, and all of YOU keep your heads to the sky.
    Lots of Hugs and Kisses Karie in Colo
  • carkris
    carkris Member Posts: 4,553 Member
    #18
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    weazer said:

    Wow It is now news too me!
    I also had a problenm with chemo...I would cry from the pain so much but the only thing that kept me sain was Paxil...for flashes and anxiety, this is first to hear that it could possibly contribute to my demon!
    Wow, I got on it the year before for depression of losing Five family members with in one year.
    However I quit it, after taking it for a couple of months, but when I found out that I had Triple negative brest cancer, I decided to go back on it for my forced menopause and mood swings...I did want to have my loved ones close buy, I did'nt want to scare them off...Lol.
    I still take it to keep me on a norm. However I will be calling my Doc tomorrow to find out the odds on what I'm taking.
    Thanks for the info, and all of YOU keep your heads to the sky.
    Lots of Hugs and Kisses Karie in Colo

    I did not think pacil
    I did not think pacil increased your risk I just thought it could interfere with the tamoxifen. I take lexapro, and it is very helpful. My prescriber said some oncs like their pts on a seratonin uptaker as it can help improve the immune system. I dont know if its biological or the decrease in anxiety that helps your immune system. I want to do yoga or tai chi I think it would be helpful to have something good thats meditative as opposed to non productive agonizing, which I am good at. My journey this summer is to be my best friend and get strong again. which is productive. hUGS TO YOU it will get better
  • CypressCynthia
    CypressCynthia Member Posts: 4,014 Member
    #19
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    carkris said:

    I did not think pacil
    I did not think pacil increased your risk I just thought it could interfere with the tamoxifen. I take lexapro, and it is very helpful. My prescriber said some oncs like their pts on a seratonin uptaker as it can help improve the immune system. I dont know if its biological or the decrease in anxiety that helps your immune system. I want to do yoga or tai chi I think it would be helpful to have something good thats meditative as opposed to non productive agonizing, which I am good at. My journey this summer is to be my best friend and get strong again. which is productive. hUGS TO YOU it will get better

    Paxil
    There are studies indicating that Paxil increases risk. See: http://www.cancer.org/docroot/NWS/content/NWS_1_1x_Possible_Antidepressant_Breast_Cancer_Link_Explored.asp

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