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i just lost my wife

mirna i miss u
Posts: 2
Joined: Feb 2010

i lost my wife two weeks ago.she was only 30 years old and was fighting all leukemia for almost six years.she has two bone marrow transplant and lost her battle to infections and pneumonia.i was with my wife for almost 14 years and i dont know what im gona do with out her.

Posts: 3
Joined: Feb 2010

I'm sorry you lost your wife. My husband has AML and is still fighting. I suggest yu find a way to do something in her honor such as Relay for Life. There are many ways to bring tribute to her. Find the one that works for you.

Posts: 2
Joined: Mar 2010

I just lost my mother a week ago she had Mylodysplastic syndrome that transitioned into leukemia. My mom lasted about 2 and half weeks after it became leukemia she died of pneumonia and various infections. That her body couldn't fight off it happened so fast there was no time for Chemo. I'm still in shock, and having difficulty accepting that she is no longer here.

Posts: 2
Joined: Apr 2010

I'm sorry about your loss. This goes for everyone in this post that has lost someone to cancer. I'm 23 years old now and I had AML Cancer when I was 2 years old. My mother as well had cancer. I'm currently serving in the US Army and am in good health. My love and thoughts go out to all who are in this fight. The fight for cancer, and/or the fight for your life. Please continue to reach out and speak with others on this. Its ok to be sad in this time, thers nothing wrong with being sad. And wether or not you believe in God or not, I pray that he is with you in your time of need. If you havent heard the old song "Foot Steps in the Sand", maybe you should listen to it. I'm sure you can hear it anywhere on the internet. God is still with you now. And if your relationship with him is not solid, he's waiting for you. Peace to you all.


Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2010

He had MDS first - the first treatments worked - and he went into remission.
Then in August of 09 - it went into AML. Its a very agressive disease and the disease is brutal. We both fought a war. My husband went to Stanford and was in a clinical trial there - it wiped everything out - then he kept getting pneumonia and then was pumped with high powered antibiotics. After the chemo, blood transfusions, platelet transfusions, infections and whatever else they could pump into him - his body just couldnt take it anymore. They offered other artificial options to keep him around - he asked me to let him go. I love him too much to be cruel and I agreed. He put up a good fight and I miss him so much but I couldnt see him suffer anymore as well. I believe in God and Jesus Christ and my faith is what is getting me through. He is in heaven and free of this terrible disease.

Posts: 6
Joined: Apr 2010

I am very sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. I too was dx with AML in Aug.2009. Yes, the induction chemo is very rough; and so is the consolidation chemo. I also had pheumonia when i was in the hospital the first time for almost 2 months. It is a very brutal disease, and it is very rough to go thru. I thought i would never come home. Going thru the blood transfusions, platlets and ALL the antibiotics was something I would never want to have again. My counts were not coming back up and my doctor thought it was because of all the antibiotics the infectious disease doctors were giving me, so he stopped 3 out of the 12 i was being given. My platlets finally went up to 20, inwhich time i was allowed to go home. When i had the first consolidation chemo in Oct. i was back ina week to the day but went in with worse side affects. I had a urinary infection, lung infection and the worse was a staff infection developed and spread. I was in deep trouble and naturally my counts rock bottomed. I also had surgery on my face due to one of the sores, and they almost lost me. I can understand what your husband went thru; because at that point I didn't feel that i could take anymore and just wanted to give up. I had much support from my fiance, doctor's and nurses and all gave me incouragement. Finally after 3 1/2 weeks I went home with my pic-line still in and antibiotics given for 2 weeks after that. I finally got it out and went on pill anit. I told my doctor i could not go thru this again. In Jan, 2010 he wanted me to have another chemo treatment, but i said i would only do it if he gave me 1/2 and not the whole thing. He agreed with me but that was not his idea; it was mine. With the 1/2 treatment i still had 6 transfusions, my counts went down but i was not hospitalized. After my BMB the 2nd week of April i am now in remission. But my doctor did say that I still have the 50/50% chance of a relaps. I am just holding on to what I have now and if i do relaps i feel it is gods will. If anyone knows,he does and i don't want to go thru any of that pain again. I just wake up every day and go about my life as i can until it comes back.
By the way, how old was your husband, if i may ask.
Sorry to hear about him, but i do believe too he is in no more pain also.

Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2011

I hope you don't mind me contacting you, for you its been a year since you lost your wife, mine is three just weeks. My wife died from complications with her AML, she was diagnosed only five months ago, she was one week from her 45th birthday. i know what you meant by not knowing what your going to do without her, Is it any easier now? I loved my wife and always will, she was my soulmate. Everyday seems harder. I hope your doing well.

Posts: 1
Joined: Apr 2012

Hi there

On the 9th of march 2012 i lost my 24 year old girlfriend to AML, she had had a full bone marrow transplant, the doner was a 12/12 match but she replapsed january 2012. The last couple of months have being horific. I feel angry to the point of wanting to do something ridiculas, however i no she wouldnt of wanted me to. She was the most lovely, kind, outgoing person you could ever wish to meet. Having watched her suffer at the end i just cant begin to understand why this has happened to someone like my girlfriend. I no nobody has answers for me, and i appreciate that this is a process im going to have to deal with, but even knowing this it doesnt stop me from wanting to no.

Posts: 8
Joined: Apr 2012

I am so sorry to hear about your girlfriend. I cannot imagine how hard that must be, having two friends who have gone through AML themselves. I have faith that you will heal with time...I know that it seems unimaginable now but you will. Hang in there and know that this community cares about you! Will be praying that you find strength in this tough time.

Posts: 1
Joined: Jul 2014

I lost my wife who was 43 after losing her battle to Mastetic breast cancer. she leaves behind two small children ages 11 and 12. we had been together for over 16 years. She was diagnosed in 2006. I quit my job just so I could care for her. i held her in my arms as she took her last breath. It's a feeling I will never forget. 

My children and i will miss her so much.


i will be with her soon. 





Posts: 1
Joined: Nov 2014

CryI lost my beloved wife on September 5, 2009 to ALL (acute lymphoblastic leukemia).  For 20 months I got to see how strong she really was and although I loved her with all my heart and we had five beautiful children together, she became my hero during her fight.  She was a woman that decided it wouldn't beat her (even though in the end it did) and she fought to be with all of us.  She was....no....is....my hero.....she was stronger than I ever thought I could be....or can be.....she had a beautiful soul and it was...no....is....an honour to be her husband.  I miss her as much today as I did when she first left us.  If I had one....no two....wishes, one would be to make ALL cancers a thing of the past....not just breast cancer, not just prostate cancer, not any single cancer....but ALL of them.....and two....would be that if I had no choice to see her go to get that chance, with her able to speak....to be able to properly say "so long for now.....".  Between not being able to properly say that and having the doctors pull her respirator as they told me she would not be "getting better and was almost gone", I long for that one last loving moment....as husband and wife....to hold her and say I love you....and need you....and to say sorry for all the wrongs in our 17.5 years of marriage together....

Posts: 6
Joined: Jul 2014

I wanted to let you know that you have my heartfelt sympathy for the loss of your beloved wife.  Words won't help.  But I will say a prayer for you that you will find peace.  I have cll (leukemia).  It is a killer,too.  But is chronic, generally giving us a bit more time.  I am struggling with it physically, but my heart goes out to you in your pain.  Yes, we need to stop all cancers.  Leukemia is a terrible thing; like all cancers.  But we hear too little about it until we have it. Please know that I am thinking of you.

Posts: 4
Joined: Jan 2015

My Husband has CLL and would like to know how you are being treated for it.  He will start Obinutuzumab. I m a bit worried about that as I have never heard of it.

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