How to keep positive?
I have felt overwhelmed by grief and I still don't accept it. I would have thought by now I would have. I also have a lot of pain issues and even have some numbness.
What do you do to keep positive and do you ever really accept having cancer? I was so healthy like many of you thought also. I have a hard time thinking my body has turned on me.
Comments
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Idamama
1st thing I would do is get a 2nd opion it is not the job of any doctor to say anything will stop working . He needs to seek another line of work...would make a great undertaker...I would ask another doctor to look at me...you said the tumors shrank 80% than why did they not change the chemo drug you were taking at that rate of shinkage something was working..The way to cope is through your faith in God . His is the hightest powered doctor you want on your case...Please do not give up never say die say I am going to kick cancer's azz and do it don't sit around await for the doctor you have to do much he has already given up. Get coppies of all your test and x-rays ,lab and get to another ONC...will pray for you...
Louann0 -
Hope
Hi
I was stage 4 with spread to lymph and overy. I am wondering why they did not do surgery and remove your tumor? I had half my colon removed, lymph nodes and total hysterectomy then did chemo. Had a colostomy about a year and got it reversed. I am a little over 5 years from my first emergency surgery and doing pretty well. It sounds like you need to get very proactive and find some different doctors, and a hospital that is on the cutting edge of cancer treatments, there are plenty of them out there, people on this site can let you know what's around your area if you ask. Don't give up hope yet, I thought I was dead for sure at first, but look, here I am. I hope you find a doctor that will be more proactive in your treatment soon.
Pam0 -
Hey there. I was also
Hey there. I was also diagnosed in July '09. Stage IV rectal. I also did not have the primary tumor resected. Instead, a colostomy to avoid full blockage of my rectum and 6 treatments of aggressive, systemic chemo - folfox and avastin. Overall tumor reduction of 40% or so. I'm 38. So we have a few things in common. Fun.
What is "Small cell" cancer? What drugs were you on? And why the he11 did your Dr. say there was not much hope? I did not ask my Dr. for a prognosis when I was diagnosed. I asked him last week and he said that the standard Stage IV prognosis is 2 years. "Some people live less. Some people live more, a lot more , than 2 years," he said. Why does your Dr. think that the other drugs are guaranteed not to work? Does it have something to do with the cancer being "Small cell?" My Dr. is confident in the second line drugs that I'll move to once I can;t take any more Oxi. What kind of alternative treatment are you doing?
Your body has not turned on you. It never will. I promise you. Your body will never turn on you. Your body is under attack by a nasty, crappy, band of bastards. It wants to be healed.
You can't fake being positive. You have to find it for yourself. (I think Sundanceh Craig said that a while back?) But know this - you are not alone in this journey. I stay positive with humor - dark humor. I don't accept that I have cancer - I embrace it. I live moment to moment. I work when I can. I make pan cakes. I sing to my kids. I meditate. I talk to crows. I build fires. When I'm overwhelmed with grief I feel it all the way until the grief flows away.
One last question: Who's da mama? You Da Mama!!!!
Take care,
Roger0 -
My understanding is your
My understanding is your small cell colorectal cancer is very aggressive and very rare form of colorectal cancer. Have you started the alternative treatment? What does it involve? Your one statement, that you are overwhelmed by grief and you still don't accept it- I think to some degree is very common with anyone who has cancer. Sometimes I think it is the human denial kicking in to protect us. There is nothing wrong with that, sometimes denial is healthy!0 -
You have 2 choices.......Crow71 said:Hey there. I was also
Hey there. I was also diagnosed in July '09. Stage IV rectal. I also did not have the primary tumor resected. Instead, a colostomy to avoid full blockage of my rectum and 6 treatments of aggressive, systemic chemo - folfox and avastin. Overall tumor reduction of 40% or so. I'm 38. So we have a few things in common. Fun.
What is "Small cell" cancer? What drugs were you on? And why the he11 did your Dr. say there was not much hope? I did not ask my Dr. for a prognosis when I was diagnosed. I asked him last week and he said that the standard Stage IV prognosis is 2 years. "Some people live less. Some people live more, a lot more , than 2 years," he said. Why does your Dr. think that the other drugs are guaranteed not to work? Does it have something to do with the cancer being "Small cell?" My Dr. is confident in the second line drugs that I'll move to once I can;t take any more Oxi. What kind of alternative treatment are you doing?
Your body has not turned on you. It never will. I promise you. Your body will never turn on you. Your body is under attack by a nasty, crappy, band of bastards. It wants to be healed.
You can't fake being positive. You have to find it for yourself. (I think Sundanceh Craig said that a while back?) But know this - you are not alone in this journey. I stay positive with humor - dark humor. I don't accept that I have cancer - I embrace it. I live moment to moment. I work when I can. I make pan cakes. I sing to my kids. I meditate. I talk to crows. I build fires. When I'm overwhelmed with grief I feel it all the way until the grief flows away.
One last question: Who's da mama? You Da Mama!!!!
Take care,
Roger
Please bear with me, I sometimes can be blunt but I don't think bedside manner is what you are looking for if Im guessing right.........
OK, your 2 choices are...you can quit it all and live the rest of your life knowing what the outcome will be...OR, you can as they say "Fight Like A Girl" and get to juicing (see Emily "2bhealed" on here, she is the juice chick extraordinaire then take off somewhere else and get another not opinion, another set of Drs that will go the extra mile it sometimes takes to get the job done, you see there are 2 different types of people in this world. There are the types that wish they could do something and there are the other types that are glad they did. Which one do you want to be...I hope money is not the issue or the ability to travel...Please, get your game face on and take a walk on the WILD SIDE, find another set of Drs and tell them you want to live..and see what their reply is, its obvious that you have come to the end of your present Drs rope....Tell him thanks but move on..for your sake......I did the same thing, I called Vanderbilt and told them that if I stayed here I would die, I was at Vanderbilt the next Monday morning as a patient, that was April 3rd 2008..........and I have never looked back or second guessed myself....remember, they work for you....Love and Hope for you and yours.......Buzz
BTW...I just started back on Florextine 20mg per day...It is a generic "Prozac"...It doesn't change the way I operate , it only allows me to cope which before I was like you are now, unable to do anything but sob and grieve...I got off of them about 2 months ago...bad mistake, I am close to being where I use to be so I went yesterday and re prescribed my prescription. It keeps me from dwelling on sad affairs and lets me even smile...A months supply for me is $3 ... Well worth it, it takes about 2 weeks to start to tell its working.......0 -
Idamama -
Tough spot, ehh? It's like being between a rock and my
sister-in-laws meat loaf.
I'm a victim of Colon Cancer, 3c (or 4, depending on the onc).
They took almost all my colon, leaving about a foot.. and gave me
a "temporary" ileostomy that would take the same major operation
to reverse.
I never did Chemo or radiation. My surgical wound took so long
to heal (almost 6 months), that they felt it had less than a 50%
chance of working, if at all. It was going to be a "wait and see"
event, and since I had it in so many lymph nodes, they didn't feel
it would be too long before they'd "see" where the cancer's moved to.
My surgery was over three years ago. I'm still here.
Do yourself a favor. Get a second and third opinion. Get the new
opinions from qualified doctors out of the area, or at least, not
of the same group as each other. Second and third opinions
should be mandatory. Most all experienced physicians welcome
second opinions; it is not taken as an "insult".
You need a second opinion, not because your doctor gave you
an opinion that seemed cold and insensitive (he may have wanted
to shock you to your total alertness), but because doctors are human
and a human's opinion is just a human's opinion, and can be wrong.
If you continue to get the same negative answers, explore other
alternatives. Chemotherapy and radiation isn't the only way to
fight cancer. Explore this website's forums, and it's archives, and
you'll find many references to "alternatives". You'll find quite a few
here, that are fighting it without using "conventional" medicine.
Do NOT give up. And do not resign yourself to anyone's opinion
of what your status is, what your prognosis is, or what path you
should follow.
Personally, I have tried my best to understand that I was never
intended to live forever; that just as I was born, I will die. Dying is
as much a part of living as being born. It's a hard pill to swallow.
If I were in my 90s or 100s, I'd still wish to see another day, just as
I wish now, to see another tomorrow. But accepting my mortality has
helped me understand that my fight to survive, should be tempered
with my mortality in mind.
I accept the premise that I will not live forever, and make plans
for the chance I might be leaving sooner than I'd like. If I leave,
I won't be leaving too much of a mess behind; If I stay around,
I'll have more time to enjoy life without the mess.
So don't give up. Plan for the worst; dream for the best.
Vacuum the house and clean the garage.
Seriously, use whatever time you can spare to understand cancer
and it's nuances, and read, read, read. You have a lifetime full of
options and paths to follow. Don't allow fear to drive you down
paths to nowhere; use your instincts and your common sense.
If a cancer tumor is taking over a vital organ, it might have to be
surgically removed for speed's sake, but you can fight the balance
of cancer cells in whatever manner you feel is best for you.
You were made to survive, just as any wild animal was. Wild animals
do quite well without seeing a doctor and taking pills in the middle of
the jungle; they survive by their natural instincts of survival.
You'll do fine, once you start listening to the new you.
Take a deep breath, and think healthy!
John0 -
What everyone above has said is the damn truth
What everyone above has said is the damn truth. Most of us that are now NED have heard the words “You have 2 years”. The other phrase that I hated to hear was “I don’t want to give you false hope”. BS
You need to find a new doc now. One that will fight with you.
You need to muster your own body’s warriors to the battle front. The doctors can only do so much as your support troops. You have to and can do the rest.
It is time to kick some cancer ****.
You have to think this every minute of every day. Plan on doing something you want to do NEXT year. Then fight like hell to get there.
I know I probably still have a few cancer cells floating around in me. Every night I give my body’s warriors orders to find them and kill them. If they want to do a little water boarding, well that’s ok to.
When you are a cancer warrior, you never give up. We make Marines look like wimps.0 -
Idamama
I to have stage 4 cc. I to was overwhelmed by grief. My first onc said 5 years, maximum. Thats textbook BS. Find a new team of doctors, right away. What part of the country do live in ? There are many people on this board who may be able to recommend doctors or hospitals that are excellent. I hope you have some support around you. Husband, partner, kids, parents, friends and siblings, etc. I wish you the best and keep in touch.
John0 -
Fears are hard to fight
I agree with the others, get a second opinion or third if you have to. I am not that familiar with small cell colorectal. I am stage 4 colorectal cancer survivor. I was first DX at the age of 38, no symptoms and no family history. I struggled through chemo, radiation, 2 major surgeries, and 2 yrs later i am still here and the Lord willing I am all clear of cancer. I have my check ups in a few weeks, but what i am trying to say it doctors dont know when our time will be up, there are many stage 4 survivors here and all over the world. Dont give up hope, and have faith. I will be praying for you.
I dont recommend fighting the fears that you must be feeling. Allow yourself to feel them, cry, scream, throw fits, work through those feelings, feel them, then move on, dont allow them to control you. Easier said then done, yes I know, but it can be done. We all have our own different fears about things, whether its the treatments, side effect, scan results, the cancer returning, or death. You are not alone at all in having these fears and concerns. Its pretty much the new norm for alot of us.
This board will provide you alot of support and great info, please feel free to ask anything at anytime. You have come to the best family around. Welcome
God Bless
Beth0 -
hello
Hi Idamama,
I just wrote on another thread that I was going to take a weekend break from the board, but then I read your post and had to reply. Anyway, you've been given some good advice here by others. BTW, there certainly is no shame in asking for a medication that might help you to cope a little better, as Buzzard talked about. YOU ARE NOT ALONE- so many of us are here with you. It certainly isn't easy and certainly doesn't seem fair that we have been given this lot in life. I'm on a tough road right now, myself, of looking for what I can possibly do next when it seems like I don't have many treatment possibilities left. I've taken mainline chemo 3 different times (more if you include chemo during radiation and two other times for maintenance) now plus I just went off of an offline experimental treatment that didn't work for me. But, I'm still going to keep on searching! I believe I can find something.
One main difference in our situations is that you've apparently been treated by a doctor that decided to not keep in mind the importance of bolstering the fighting spirit within his patientby trying to give you the hope you need. Telling you that you're going to eventually fail or advance on whatever you take next is awful. Even if there's been truth to it in your past, doctors need to realize what telling that kind of news does to someone! He may think he's being realistic and is preparing you. Like any of us need to be prepared by being told dismal news! I told all my doctors I've come in contact with first thing that I don't ever want to be told "you have x number of months or years left". My main oncologist replied back "No, I won't do that because we doctors are usually wrong about that anyhow. Even if someone directly asks me, I tell them the statistics but clarify by telling them that doesn't mean anything at all- everyone's situation is different." I liked that answer! I told the drs. that I'm realistic and know what can happen, but that I don't ever want to hear that because it would kill my hope and fighting spirit. I'm so sorry you've had that happen to you. You've got to find a way to re-ignite that fighting spirit! I would, MOST DEFINITELY, seek out another opinion or two by an oncologist who works for an NCI cancer center. That is what I've finally done and will look for more if I have to.
Thinking about my kids having to live without a mom makes me angry at cancer and that anger makes me say "NO- I will NOT become one of those cancer death statistics! I'm going to fight and beat this!" It is my belief that God then settles me down by giving me a peace- a peace that really surpasses all understanding. That is how I get through it all. I know not everyone shares that kind of belief but, for me, I don't know how I could ever do this without that reassurance from what I believe.
I care about you- please feel free to send me a private message anytime.
Hugs to you,
Lisa0 -
Hope
Idamama,
There's a lot of hope here and my wish for you is that you feel and receive that hope and continue to fight. You've grieved and you may still, and you're still fighting by using the intensive alternative treatment. There may be other treatments or trials that you don't know about.
What part of the country do you live?
If you haven't read Roger's poem (Crow71), read it now.
And feel some Sparks coming your way.
In the Light,
Aud0 -
Thank you for all the
Thank you for all the feedback. It's so nice to know that I don't walk alone in my thoughts and feelings.
Like the You damama! Actually Idamama comes from I'm a mama who happens to live in Idaho.
They treated me with carboplatin and etoposide. 3 day treatments every 3 weeks for 5 months. They wouldn't do surgery because they said it had spread too far and it was all over my body so I would end up with a colostomy and still end up with cancer elsewhere.
Small cell rectal cancer is very rare. I believe only a thousand or so documented cases.
I went to San Francisco and got a 2nd opinion. The onc said she would not recommend any other treatment than what my current onc was suggesting and didn't have any trials.
All these dead ends is why I took it into my own hands and pray that with this alternative enzyme therapy (Dr. Gonzalez in New York practices) my body will heal itself. I don't believe chemo was going to be able to capture all the cancerous cells in my body. I felt I was prolonging my death and not finding life.
Day by day I suppose. If I could get out of my physical pain and get that under control it would be a huge relief mentally. I am on oxycontin and hydrocodone. Possible may try Fentanyl patch. Has anyone tried that? I take approximately 140 supplements including enzymes a day. I juice, eat a diet that is made for me and coffee enemas. It's all so extreme but so is cancer. Also doing a lot of soul searching, praying and forgiving since this came about approximately a year after my divorce.
~Love in light~0 -
This comment has been removed by the ModeratorJohn23 said:Idamama -
Tough spot, ehh? It's like being between a rock and my
sister-in-laws meat loaf.
I'm a victim of Colon Cancer, 3c (or 4, depending on the onc).
They took almost all my colon, leaving about a foot.. and gave me
a "temporary" ileostomy that would take the same major operation
to reverse.
I never did Chemo or radiation. My surgical wound took so long
to heal (almost 6 months), that they felt it had less than a 50%
chance of working, if at all. It was going to be a "wait and see"
event, and since I had it in so many lymph nodes, they didn't feel
it would be too long before they'd "see" where the cancer's moved to.
My surgery was over three years ago. I'm still here.
Do yourself a favor. Get a second and third opinion. Get the new
opinions from qualified doctors out of the area, or at least, not
of the same group as each other. Second and third opinions
should be mandatory. Most all experienced physicians welcome
second opinions; it is not taken as an "insult".
You need a second opinion, not because your doctor gave you
an opinion that seemed cold and insensitive (he may have wanted
to shock you to your total alertness), but because doctors are human
and a human's opinion is just a human's opinion, and can be wrong.
If you continue to get the same negative answers, explore other
alternatives. Chemotherapy and radiation isn't the only way to
fight cancer. Explore this website's forums, and it's archives, and
you'll find many references to "alternatives". You'll find quite a few
here, that are fighting it without using "conventional" medicine.
Do NOT give up. And do not resign yourself to anyone's opinion
of what your status is, what your prognosis is, or what path you
should follow.
Personally, I have tried my best to understand that I was never
intended to live forever; that just as I was born, I will die. Dying is
as much a part of living as being born. It's a hard pill to swallow.
If I were in my 90s or 100s, I'd still wish to see another day, just as
I wish now, to see another tomorrow. But accepting my mortality has
helped me understand that my fight to survive, should be tempered
with my mortality in mind.
I accept the premise that I will not live forever, and make plans
for the chance I might be leaving sooner than I'd like. If I leave,
I won't be leaving too much of a mess behind; If I stay around,
I'll have more time to enjoy life without the mess.
So don't give up. Plan for the worst; dream for the best.
Vacuum the house and clean the garage.
Seriously, use whatever time you can spare to understand cancer
and it's nuances, and read, read, read. You have a lifetime full of
options and paths to follow. Don't allow fear to drive you down
paths to nowhere; use your instincts and your common sense.
If a cancer tumor is taking over a vital organ, it might have to be
surgically removed for speed's sake, but you can fight the balance
of cancer cells in whatever manner you feel is best for you.
You were made to survive, just as any wild animal was. Wild animals
do quite well without seeing a doctor and taking pills in the middle of
the jungle; they survive by their natural instincts of survival.
You'll do fine, once you start listening to the new you.
Take a deep breath, and think healthy!
John0 -
This comment has been removed by the ModeratorIdamama said:Thank you for all the
Thank you for all the feedback. It's so nice to know that I don't walk alone in my thoughts and feelings.
Like the You damama! Actually Idamama comes from I'm a mama who happens to live in Idaho.
They treated me with carboplatin and etoposide. 3 day treatments every 3 weeks for 5 months. They wouldn't do surgery because they said it had spread too far and it was all over my body so I would end up with a colostomy and still end up with cancer elsewhere.
Small cell rectal cancer is very rare. I believe only a thousand or so documented cases.
I went to San Francisco and got a 2nd opinion. The onc said she would not recommend any other treatment than what my current onc was suggesting and didn't have any trials.
All these dead ends is why I took it into my own hands and pray that with this alternative enzyme therapy (Dr. Gonzalez in New York practices) my body will heal itself. I don't believe chemo was going to be able to capture all the cancerous cells in my body. I felt I was prolonging my death and not finding life.
Day by day I suppose. If I could get out of my physical pain and get that under control it would be a huge relief mentally. I am on oxycontin and hydrocodone. Possible may try Fentanyl patch. Has anyone tried that? I take approximately 140 supplements including enzymes a day. I juice, eat a diet that is made for me and coffee enemas. It's all so extreme but so is cancer. Also doing a lot of soul searching, praying and forgiving since this came about approximately a year after my divorce.
~Love in light~0 -
Idamama -Idamama said:Thank you for all the
Thank you for all the feedback. It's so nice to know that I don't walk alone in my thoughts and feelings.
Like the You damama! Actually Idamama comes from I'm a mama who happens to live in Idaho.
They treated me with carboplatin and etoposide. 3 day treatments every 3 weeks for 5 months. They wouldn't do surgery because they said it had spread too far and it was all over my body so I would end up with a colostomy and still end up with cancer elsewhere.
Small cell rectal cancer is very rare. I believe only a thousand or so documented cases.
I went to San Francisco and got a 2nd opinion. The onc said she would not recommend any other treatment than what my current onc was suggesting and didn't have any trials.
All these dead ends is why I took it into my own hands and pray that with this alternative enzyme therapy (Dr. Gonzalez in New York practices) my body will heal itself. I don't believe chemo was going to be able to capture all the cancerous cells in my body. I felt I was prolonging my death and not finding life.
Day by day I suppose. If I could get out of my physical pain and get that under control it would be a huge relief mentally. I am on oxycontin and hydrocodone. Possible may try Fentanyl patch. Has anyone tried that? I take approximately 140 supplements including enzymes a day. I juice, eat a diet that is made for me and coffee enemas. It's all so extreme but so is cancer. Also doing a lot of soul searching, praying and forgiving since this came about approximately a year after my divorce.
~Love in light~
Re:
">I am on oxycontin and hydrocodone. Possible may try Fentanyl patch.
>Also doing a lot of soul searching, praying and forgiving since this came
about approximately a year after my divorce."
Forget the remorse, one thing has absolutely nothing to do with the other.
Clergy, entertainers, philanthropists, 80 married year mom & pops,
and murders all get cancer. Innocent kids get cancer. Our dog had cancer.
The narcotics, and any other type of pain meds will have a downside
along with any benefit you get; so will the antidepressants - big time!
Anything that is a chemical will wear heavy on the liver. The liver produces
Serotonin and Melatonin, both of what regulates your heart rhythm, and
your mood.
In Traditional Chinese Medicine, "depression" is due to a "liver deficiency".
They treat the liver; energize it, and the symptoms disappear.
So taking pains meds usually produces depression, and for that..... they
give you more chemicals to thwart depression. Nice.
For rectal cancer, they usually remove the cancerous material and give
you a colostomy or ileostomy. If the cells have spread and they don't have
anything to attack them with, then you've found the path you have to go.
But I would find a colorectal surgeon that can answer your questions
and give you better advice, than an oncologist. You're asking a doctor
specializing in chemicals, for advice dealing with organs. Ask the
same questions to a colorectal surgeon. One that specializes in cancer,
would be best.
You have to get your own body to fight any cancer cells, and you may
have found a way to do that. Keep getting tests to see progression, if any,
of the cancer. Don't be afraid to change plans, since no path is perfect.
There are two other things that may serve your purposes also:
Hydrazine Sulfate
Traditional Chinese Medicine
Herbs1
I took the TCM path, and do not take any western medicine at all.
You have to get any tumor out that might cause an organ to fail,
and if not by surgery, then by whatever means available. A failed organ
can kill you, so the tumor can't be allowed to grow and take over.
Anything that is not life-threatening, can be resolved in other ways,
with other than immune system killing chemicals that carry no guarantee.
You're on the right path, so gear up, and stop feeling remorseful, as
if you somehow brought this on by yourself. You didn't.
You had a normal cell somehow get damaged. It then decided to continue
living by the fermentation process. It's surviving by stealing glucose meant
for your good cells, and churning out lactic acid. Your liver is trying it's best
to turn that lactic acid back into glucose, and that's ending up going
to the cancer cell instead of the cells that need it. It's a vicious cycle.
If you eliminate sugar from your diet, you will cause your good cells
to be more starved, since it's the cancer cells that will take the glucose,
whether you're taking it in, or not. It steals it from what reserve you have.
You are going to do OK. Consider this to be a new beginning.
Stay healthy!
John0 -
Wondering about your experiencedorookie said:Fears are hard to fight
I agree with the others, get a second opinion or third if you have to. I am not that familiar with small cell colorectal. I am stage 4 colorectal cancer survivor. I was first DX at the age of 38, no symptoms and no family history. I struggled through chemo, radiation, 2 major surgeries, and 2 yrs later i am still here and the Lord willing I am all clear of cancer. I have my check ups in a few weeks, but what i am trying to say it doctors dont know when our time will be up, there are many stage 4 survivors here and all over the world. Dont give up hope, and have faith. I will be praying for you.
I dont recommend fighting the fears that you must be feeling. Allow yourself to feel them, cry, scream, throw fits, work through those feelings, feel them, then move on, dont allow them to control you. Easier said then done, yes I know, but it can be done. We all have our own different fears about things, whether its the treatments, side effect, scan results, the cancer returning, or death. You are not alone at all in having these fears and concerns. Its pretty much the new norm for alot of us.
This board will provide you alot of support and great info, please feel free to ask anything at anytime. You have come to the best family around. Welcome
God Bless
Beth
I was wondering if you would be willing to share some of your experiences you have had with your cancer. My son's sounds a lot like it is where yours was and he is only 31. Though there is family history the doctors have told us there is no way for us to have known this was happening because of his age no one would have checked. Fortuanately when he was expereincing pain that would not go away after two weeks we took him to the ER at Gritman and they were excellent about getting right on it. He has his first chemo treatment this next week. Where did you recieve your treament? His doctor is in Lewiston, I do not know much about the center there, I am more familiar with the one at Kootenai Memrial Hospital. Of course at this point all we have is questions so if you can think of anything that you think is especially important for us to know could you pass it on. Anyone else with information it is greatley appreciated. One thing that does give me hope is that my Dad was a colon cancer survivor 38 years ago before the newer treatments and the knowledge they all have. Though his was found early and had not apread anywhere else unlike my sons who's is in 80% of his liver also. The first day we were told all we heard was doom and gllom but we have heard more positive things since so that has helped us all have a better outlook.
Thanks
Linda0 -
You Da MamaCrow71 said:Hey there. I was also
Hey there. I was also diagnosed in July '09. Stage IV rectal. I also did not have the primary tumor resected. Instead, a colostomy to avoid full blockage of my rectum and 6 treatments of aggressive, systemic chemo - folfox and avastin. Overall tumor reduction of 40% or so. I'm 38. So we have a few things in common. Fun.
What is "Small cell" cancer? What drugs were you on? And why the he11 did your Dr. say there was not much hope? I did not ask my Dr. for a prognosis when I was diagnosed. I asked him last week and he said that the standard Stage IV prognosis is 2 years. "Some people live less. Some people live more, a lot more , than 2 years," he said. Why does your Dr. think that the other drugs are guaranteed not to work? Does it have something to do with the cancer being "Small cell?" My Dr. is confident in the second line drugs that I'll move to once I can;t take any more Oxi. What kind of alternative treatment are you doing?
Your body has not turned on you. It never will. I promise you. Your body will never turn on you. Your body is under attack by a nasty, crappy, band of bastards. It wants to be healed.
You can't fake being positive. You have to find it for yourself. (I think Sundanceh Craig said that a while back?) But know this - you are not alone in this journey. I stay positive with humor - dark humor. I don't accept that I have cancer - I embrace it. I live moment to moment. I work when I can. I make pan cakes. I sing to my kids. I meditate. I talk to crows. I build fires. When I'm overwhelmed with grief I feel it all the way until the grief flows away.
One last question: Who's da mama? You Da Mama!!!!
Take care,
Roger
I love that! I believe you need to keep searching for more opinions. You could ask one hundred oncs. and get different opinions. Find one that is not going to give up, or give you a timeline (that was my earlier post). Thank you to everyone on this board that gave me the good reasons to find someone that is in it for the fight. As Kimby said, Outwit, Outplay, Outlast. You are not a statistic.
It is tough to stay positive. I think seeing a shrink for some anti-depressents in a very stressful and difficult time in your life couldn't hurt. If nothing else, having a third person to talk to. Take care and please if you ever need to talk, I am here. Marie0 -
I live in the Boise area. Ilmchils57 said:Wondering about your experience
I was wondering if you would be willing to share some of your experiences you have had with your cancer. My son's sounds a lot like it is where yours was and he is only 31. Though there is family history the doctors have told us there is no way for us to have known this was happening because of his age no one would have checked. Fortuanately when he was expereincing pain that would not go away after two weeks we took him to the ER at Gritman and they were excellent about getting right on it. He has his first chemo treatment this next week. Where did you recieve your treament? His doctor is in Lewiston, I do not know much about the center there, I am more familiar with the one at Kootenai Memrial Hospital. Of course at this point all we have is questions so if you can think of anything that you think is especially important for us to know could you pass it on. Anyone else with information it is greatley appreciated. One thing that does give me hope is that my Dad was a colon cancer survivor 38 years ago before the newer treatments and the knowledge they all have. Though his was found early and had not apread anywhere else unlike my sons who's is in 80% of his liver also. The first day we were told all we heard was doom and gllom but we have heard more positive things since so that has helped us all have a better outlook.
Thanks
Linda
I live in the Boise area. I am not familiar with the centers in Lewiston. Mine is different from many here because it is small cell. Is that what your son has? I also had extreme pain for about 2 weeks and they thought it was hemmroids because of my age and health. I ended up in the ER also because I wanted answers. I have pain now in the buttocks which I have recently gotten some lidocaine patches which have helped considerably and no side effects.
I wish you, your son and your family the best.0 -
I really can't add anything
I really can't add anything to what everyone else has had to say. My thoughts and good vibes are going your way, though.
I live on the other side of the state (South east Idaho) in Rigby. My oncs live in Rexburg who both practiced at The Huntsman clinic in SLC and one is an adjunct professor at the Uni of Utah teaching oncology.
There is always hope. We are survivors after all.
Please let us know how you are...0 -
IdamamaIdamama said:Thank you for all the
Thank you for all the feedback. It's so nice to know that I don't walk alone in my thoughts and feelings.
Like the You damama! Actually Idamama comes from I'm a mama who happens to live in Idaho.
They treated me with carboplatin and etoposide. 3 day treatments every 3 weeks for 5 months. They wouldn't do surgery because they said it had spread too far and it was all over my body so I would end up with a colostomy and still end up with cancer elsewhere.
Small cell rectal cancer is very rare. I believe only a thousand or so documented cases.
I went to San Francisco and got a 2nd opinion. The onc said she would not recommend any other treatment than what my current onc was suggesting and didn't have any trials.
All these dead ends is why I took it into my own hands and pray that with this alternative enzyme therapy (Dr. Gonzalez in New York practices) my body will heal itself. I don't believe chemo was going to be able to capture all the cancerous cells in my body. I felt I was prolonging my death and not finding life.
Day by day I suppose. If I could get out of my physical pain and get that under control it would be a huge relief mentally. I am on oxycontin and hydrocodone. Possible may try Fentanyl patch. Has anyone tried that? I take approximately 140 supplements including enzymes a day. I juice, eat a diet that is made for me and coffee enemas. It's all so extreme but so is cancer. Also doing a lot of soul searching, praying and forgiving since this came about approximately a year after my divorce.
~Love in light~
Hi,
You live in Idaho. Have you thought of coming to Utah to the Huntman Cancer Int.? They have some great doctors. The have the team thing going on.
We went up there last Sept. and have been impressed so far.
I would give them a try.
You have got a bunch of good advice here. The Onc we see isn't againist doing alternatives too. Keep hope alive and think and research your options. Best to you, Paula0
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