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Screaming In Silence!!!!!!

cyp1sunshine's picture
cyp1sunshine
Posts: 8
Joined: Jan 2010

Some times, late at night, I scream in silence!
And I don’t know why?
I am so happy in the out side, but there something inside of me that is dying!!!!!
I go round and round in my head, trying to understand what is happening!!!
I don’t understand why?
Can someone help me!! Before it consumed me?
I don know how to stop it!!!!!
I don’t know if anyone can?
Can somebody help me understand why???
I really want it to stop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Before it kills me!! Or destroys my family!!!
But I don’t know how?????

tiny one
Posts: 467
Joined: Jan 2009

Is this related to cancer? Unresolved issues? To know the answer you're going to have to go back in your mind and sort through what I call baggage. You need to talk to someone, a therapist, counselor, someone who cannot betray your privacy. EMDR therapy really helped me to release alot of issues. This is eye movement desensitization reprocessing. You can find more info online about this. I experienced depression when I had physical pain, that in turn triggered mental pain. Alot of people go thru alot of emotional and physical trials when they are dealing with cancer treatment. Sometimes this is the grief of not being like we were before. Feeling like life will never be what is was. Maybe leaving the ones we love. I am a 3 year colon cancer survivor. I have side effects from radiation, but I can do most everything that I loved to do before. Alot of your feelings were feelings that my cancer support group helped me to deal with. Please find someone that you can talk to. We're here on this board to to help.

bluerose's picture
bluerose
Posts: 1089
Joined: Jul 2009

It is unclear as to whether you have been diagnosed yourself or what the situation is? Can you share that fact please?

I remember several times, espcially when I was first diagnosed, when I did that screaming in silence thing and praying like that to with screaming it, but inside.

Whatever is doing this to you has to be investigated and I would really suggest you see a professional to help you get to the bottom of this, I did. It really helps. It doesn't mean you are crazy to see a professional, just responsible about handling your feelings is what it means.

Screaming, to me, suggests that you are fiercely trying to get whatever it is out and the body and mind know better than we do what it needs to be healthy. Listen to your body and you will be fine once you get the issues out in the open. Of course keep blogging here too.

Hugs, Bluerose

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