hello from the new girl

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diane720
diane720 Member Posts: 14
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
My name is Diane. I would like to introduce myself. I'm 34yrs old diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. Although my prognosos is good, and so is my attitude, I must say that I have my moments where I feel scared and unsure.I was diagnosed back in Sept/09 and it was the shock of my life. I cried at the the doctor's office as she told me. But once I composed myself, I dried my tears and never looked back. I realized I was in for the fight of my life and I will not be defeated. I'm going through chemo treatments now and soon a mastectomy ( which is what's scaring me the most). Radiation will soon follow after. At first I would just read the discussion boards before I joined. Everytime I did, I was really touched by the posts and the out pouring of support from all of you strong beautiful women. All of you inspire me. So I signed up! I feel like I joined a sisterhood of women, who stand together helping each other win this battle!! I hope to talk to all of you soon. Many blessings Diane

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  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
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    Diane
    Welcome to the

    Diane
    Welcome to the sisterhood no one wanted to join. But you are right we are here for each other. We support each other and listen to the questions, fears, rants, vents, brags, good news, bad news and well everything that everyone writes. We respond with love, care, concern, and humor. And while you are on this journey and beyond we will be here for you. And in turn, you will find that you will have advice, suggestions, humor, care and concern to share. That's the beauty of this board. We all give and we all get. I didn't have a mastectomy and you are the same age as my daughter so our prospective would be different in any case. But there are ladies on this site that will jump in and reassure you and answer any questions or concerns you have. But I will send my prayers and good thoughts to you.
    Stef
  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
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    fauxma said:

    Diane
    Welcome to the

    Diane
    Welcome to the sisterhood no one wanted to join. But you are right we are here for each other. We support each other and listen to the questions, fears, rants, vents, brags, good news, bad news and well everything that everyone writes. We respond with love, care, concern, and humor. And while you are on this journey and beyond we will be here for you. And in turn, you will find that you will have advice, suggestions, humor, care and concern to share. That's the beauty of this board. We all give and we all get. I didn't have a mastectomy and you are the same age as my daughter so our prospective would be different in any case. But there are ladies on this site that will jump in and reassure you and answer any questions or concerns you have. But I will send my prayers and good thoughts to you.
    Stef

    Hi there Diane!
    Hi Diane! I had a lumpectomy, so, I can't answer questions about your future surgery. I had rads, so, if you need help with them, just ask. I am so sorry to see you on this board, but, just know that we will all help you get thru this. You are not alone...never! I will be praying for you!

    ♥ Noel
  • diane720
    diane720 Member Posts: 14
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    Noel said:

    Hi there Diane!
    Hi Diane! I had a lumpectomy, so, I can't answer questions about your future surgery. I had rads, so, if you need help with them, just ask. I am so sorry to see you on this board, but, just know that we will all help you get thru this. You are not alone...never! I will be praying for you!

    ♥ Noel

    thank you
    thank you Steph and Noel for reaching out. I've handled losing my hair, going through chemo and now menopause! But I'm scared about my mastectomy. I chose to do a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction, but I'm afraid of what can go wrong.Sometimes, I feel like I'm losing everything that once made me a women. Has anyone ever felt this way?? the thought of losing my breasts really bugs me.I know all of its temporary and sometimes I feel selfish and vain for feeling this way. I should feel lucky that I'm going to be ok.
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
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    diane720 said:

    thank you
    thank you Steph and Noel for reaching out. I've handled losing my hair, going through chemo and now menopause! But I'm scared about my mastectomy. I chose to do a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction, but I'm afraid of what can go wrong.Sometimes, I feel like I'm losing everything that once made me a women. Has anyone ever felt this way?? the thought of losing my breasts really bugs me.I know all of its temporary and sometimes I feel selfish and vain for feeling this way. I should feel lucky that I'm going to be ok.

    It's not our equipment that
    It's not our equipment that makes us women but that doesn't diminish its loss. I had only a lumpectomy but I did have a hysterectomy 10 years ago. My doctor asked if I mourned or said goodbye to my uterus. I hadn't really thought about that. It was just an organ and one I wasn't likely to use again. But now I could see that mourning the loss of one's breasts or saying goodbye might help ease the fears. Breasts are the outward indicators of our womanhood. And there are other factors that can affect the degree of loss, age, single, married, dating, personal esteem etc. It's is not vain or selfish to be upset at losing one's breasts. You have already lost your hair and now facing this. I know if I was a young woman I would react much differently than I would at 61 years old. And feeling this way doesn't mean that you don't appreciate that this is the best choice for your overall outcome. But it still sucks, big time. Many ladies on here have had bilaterals with reconstruction. It isn't easy but it is doable and from what I have read they are very happy with the results. They can help you with specific questions and concerns. You are such a pretty girl with a beautiful smile and that will always be with you.
    Stef
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
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    Warm welcome, Diane
    Many read for a long time before they post - glad you finally decided to. We're all here to support and encourage each other, and walk the journey side by side - each step of the way.

    You've already made a great deal of progress along the road. Although you've got far still to go...

    My own surgery was lumpectomy (and 6+ years ago) - and it scared the **** out of me. I hope your fears lessen, somehow, as your surgery date approaches. Yes, cancer takes much from us. But, the winners of the battle retain life itself.

    The beauty of the board - it's always open, each and every day, 24/7. And no matter what day, nor what time - there's almost always someone here. (As you might already know.)

    Sending you my best wishes, and

    Kind regards, Susan
  • mariam_11_09
    mariam_11_09 Member Posts: 691
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    I am schedule to have a

    I am schedule to have a masectomy with reconstructive surgery on Jan 5th. I admit I haven't thought much about the surgery, I just focus on this moment, how I am feeling right now and just hold myself in a loving way, just like my mother would.

    Although to be honest, my fear is finding cancer somewhere else in my body. I sometimes feel sad about loosing my breast, the one that nurtured and nourished my daughter for 3 years, of my body not ever being the same. While I understand we are not our bodies, and breasts or ovaries or uterus are not what make us women, I really get this, there is a sadness about loosing the body I had come to appreciate and like.

    Hang in there. It is all God willing.
  • always
    always Member Posts: 256
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    I am schedule to have a

    I am schedule to have a masectomy with reconstructive surgery on Jan 5th. I admit I haven't thought much about the surgery, I just focus on this moment, how I am feeling right now and just hold myself in a loving way, just like my mother would.

    Although to be honest, my fear is finding cancer somewhere else in my body. I sometimes feel sad about loosing my breast, the one that nurtured and nourished my daughter for 3 years, of my body not ever being the same. While I understand we are not our bodies, and breasts or ovaries or uterus are not what make us women, I really get this, there is a sadness about loosing the body I had come to appreciate and like.

    Hang in there. It is all God willing.

    welcome
    Just adding my welcome here. You will get amazing support and answers. Best wishes and prayers your way.

    becky
  • hunkydorrie
    hunkydorrie Member Posts: 3
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    From another new girl
    Diane, you said it beautifully. I wrote my post before I saw yours. 10 years out for me and still, I have my moments. But, you are so right, the beautiful, strong women in this group are inspiration and a source of strength. You have a wonderful attitude and are determined to fight the fight. That really is half the battle. We are in the trenches together. Much love to you. Dorrie
  • SherryAF
    SherryAF Member Posts: 31
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    From another new girl
    Diane, you said it beautifully. I wrote my post before I saw yours. 10 years out for me and still, I have my moments. But, you are so right, the beautiful, strong women in this group are inspiration and a source of strength. You have a wonderful attitude and are determined to fight the fight. That really is half the battle. We are in the trenches together. Much love to you. Dorrie

    I'm glad your prognosis is good.
    I was diagnosed in October with invasive lobular/ductal carcinoma stage 1B. I had a lumpectomy with sentinel node biopsy on November 18. The lymph nodes came back negative, which was great news, but the margins weren't clear around the tumor.

    So now I have decided to get a bilateral mastectomy with immediate reconstruction. My surgery will be either Jan 5 or 12 (should find out today). My husband and I were just talking this morning about the fact that we know we've made the right decision, but sometimes waves of panic sweep over us. I can't believe our lives have changed so much in these last two months, and it's hard to believe we're having to make these kinds of decisions.

    But we've done the research, prayed, talked to people, and we feel like this is the best for me. And I know you will be glad when your surgery is over.
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
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    Diane, I just wanted to
    Diane, I just wanted to extend my welcome to you. You've joined an amazing group, but you already knew that after spending time reading the posts. We'll be with you every step of the way. Someone on this board will have the answer to any question asked. That's part of the beauty of it and the other is the beauty of the women and men involved here. You'll never be alone.
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
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    Welcome ... to a new extended family...
    Diane... I just wanted to welcome you to the boards... though I am so sorry for the reason you are here... as you know you have found a terrific group... for support, information, friendship, a true kinship... and did I mention support?? ..

    Though all of our paths are different, different dx, treatments, ect.. the journey is the same, hearing the words "you have cancer"... preparing yourself for the fight of your life... and mustering all of your streangth in order to get to kicking the beast in the arse... and not losing site of living daily this beautiful gift of life...

    Your right, we are all here for eachother... for laughter, for genuiine cyber hugs, to hold eachothers hands... to lean on .... and now we are also here for you!

    Hugs,

    ~T
  • Chrispea
    Chrispea Member Posts: 123 Member
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    taleena said:

    Welcome ... to a new extended family...
    Diane... I just wanted to welcome you to the boards... though I am so sorry for the reason you are here... as you know you have found a terrific group... for support, information, friendship, a true kinship... and did I mention support?? ..

    Though all of our paths are different, different dx, treatments, ect.. the journey is the same, hearing the words "you have cancer"... preparing yourself for the fight of your life... and mustering all of your streangth in order to get to kicking the beast in the arse... and not losing site of living daily this beautiful gift of life...

    Your right, we are all here for eachother... for laughter, for genuiine cyber hugs, to hold eachothers hands... to lean on .... and now we are also here for you!

    Hugs,

    ~T

    Hi Diane. I'm new too.
    I am

    Hi Diane. I'm new too.

    I am 42, and was diagnosed around the same time you were. I found the lump in late July and had my biopsy late August. My first chemo was Sept. 30, and I am half way.

    I was just talking a woman who just had her new boobs put in and she is very happy with them and said her surgery was pretty easy. I also was talking to my neighbor who is a plastic surgery nurse, and she was telling me how they make nipples and how pretty they turn out.

    Right now I'm struggling with should I just have one removed or remove both, and after speaking to the lady who got both done, I'm thinking that I will do both. I really, really, REALLY don't want to repeat chemo again. And with ductile bc there is a 25% chance of it going to the other breast.

    And, I will quote what she wrote me, this will make you laugh:
    "I didn't want to look sports illustrated on one side and national geographic on the other-LOL Plus like tires I wanted them to wear out at the same time- which is smart."

    LOL!

    I want my tires to wear out the same, too.

    Good luck to you, you sound like you have a great kick butt attitude.

    Chris
  • newbiefromcananda
    newbiefromcananda Member Posts: 234
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    welcome diane you are in
    welcome diane you are in good hands ... have a great christmas xoxoxoox ((((hugs))) Lisa
  • Cat64
    Cat64 Member Posts: 1,192
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    Hi Diane
    and Welcome! So glad you decided to join, although sorry for your reason. We have been, or are now, where you are in the journey of this battle. I, like you, have only cried after my diagnosis. I have chosen to refuse to accept this. I'm doing all I can do, and someday it may all tumble down on me like a ton of bricks, but in the meantime, I refuse to let it get the best of me. I know I must stay strong & positive to overcome this challenge life has dumped on me. Every step I have taken so far has scared the H--L out of me, but faith and the support of all my new sisters have carried me through. We are all here for you 24/7 in whatever way you need to help guide you to the light at the end of the tunnel!
    Merry Christmas
    ♥ Cat
  • Kat11
    Kat11 Member Posts: 1,931 Member
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    Cat64 said:

    Hi Diane
    and Welcome! So glad you decided to join, although sorry for your reason. We have been, or are now, where you are in the journey of this battle. I, like you, have only cried after my diagnosis. I have chosen to refuse to accept this. I'm doing all I can do, and someday it may all tumble down on me like a ton of bricks, but in the meantime, I refuse to let it get the best of me. I know I must stay strong & positive to overcome this challenge life has dumped on me. Every step I have taken so far has scared the H--L out of me, but faith and the support of all my new sisters have carried me through. We are all here for you 24/7 in whatever way you need to help guide you to the light at the end of the tunnel!
    Merry Christmas
    ♥ Cat

    Welcome Diane
    I am so glad you found us. I have only been on the board since April and I know how much it helped me get through all that we have to do. I had a lumpectomy, so I can't help you there, but I have been through Chemo and ready to start Rads. Again welcome.
  • diane720
    diane720 Member Posts: 14
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    Kat11 said:

    Welcome Diane
    I am so glad you found us. I have only been on the board since April and I know how much it helped me get through all that we have to do. I had a lumpectomy, so I can't help you there, but I have been through Chemo and ready to start Rads. Again welcome.

    Hi everyone
    Thank you for your wonderful advice and support. I must admit I got choked up!! I admire your strenght ladies, and I'm so glad to have joined this group of amazing women. It feels good to know I have a place that gives me the support I need. I wish you all a Happy Happy Holiday!!
  • Sharon40
    Sharon40 Member Posts: 93
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    Thanks
    Thanks for sharing your story. It does me good to hear others with such great attitudes. It helps me stay focused! I wish you the best. Sharon
  • denbralou
    denbralou Member Posts: 66
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    Sharon40 said:

    Thanks
    Thanks for sharing your story. It does me good to hear others with such great attitudes. It helps me stay focused! I wish you the best. Sharon

    Hello Diane
    Hello Diane, you found a good site with a bunch of very supportive woman. I was just diagnosed in the middle of November and just started my chemo on Monday. After going through 4 months of chemo, I too will be having a bilateral masectomy by choice. I only have cancer in the left breast, but I do not want to have to go through this again so I am choosing to have them both done. It scares me very much too, I think we are all scared of the unknown, but we can get through this one step at a time. Happy Holidays. Denise
  • lovelylola
    lovelylola Member Posts: 279
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    Chrispea said:

    Hi Diane. I'm new too.
    I am

    Hi Diane. I'm new too.

    I am 42, and was diagnosed around the same time you were. I found the lump in late July and had my biopsy late August. My first chemo was Sept. 30, and I am half way.

    I was just talking a woman who just had her new boobs put in and she is very happy with them and said her surgery was pretty easy. I also was talking to my neighbor who is a plastic surgery nurse, and she was telling me how they make nipples and how pretty they turn out.

    Right now I'm struggling with should I just have one removed or remove both, and after speaking to the lady who got both done, I'm thinking that I will do both. I really, really, REALLY don't want to repeat chemo again. And with ductile bc there is a 25% chance of it going to the other breast.

    And, I will quote what she wrote me, this will make you laugh:
    "I didn't want to look sports illustrated on one side and national geographic on the other-LOL Plus like tires I wanted them to wear out at the same time- which is smart."

    LOL!

    I want my tires to wear out the same, too.

    Good luck to you, you sound like you have a great kick butt attitude.

    Chris

    Tires wear out
    You know I had never even thought of it in those terms but that certainly gives me a response when some asks me (and they do!) why I chose to have a bilateral mastectomy. At 60 I'm not sure I'd ever look like sports illustrated on one side but would have definitely look like national geographic on the other.
    Welcome to this wonderful family. The support I've gotten since my diagnosis in August has been amazing. Write when you can. It seems like someone is always on. We are spread from sea to the middle of shining sea (I'm in Hawaii) and encompass many time zones.
    Lola