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MOE58's picture
Posts: 649
Joined: May 2009

Well we are in our own room now, after 14 days in ICU, we will be in the hospital 2 weeks tomorrow, I have seen my husband on Death door, I actually know he was so close to dying, he has come so far, I prayed to GOD every day to bring him back to me, and I would never fuss with him again, well maybe just in a different way, I have discovered my husband is so more emotional and crys all the time and he never did that before, when I leave he crys and he use to joke and say I am a BIG BOY, you can leave now he don't want me to leave at all, HE has went from 14 tubes to 2 with a foley cath, he got up today and walked down the hall and back, which is good the more he does things the better he will get, I am so blessed to have him in my life, we will be able to celebrate our anniversary of 3 years on 21st of August, I didn't know if I would see that come on not 2 weeks ago, would we go through surgery again, yes we would. AS a caregiver you have a very hard part, you have to bath them, help them in bed, be there for them, and loose alot of sleep. When I lost my mother about year ago, I buried what you call your BIG GIRL PANTIES, and said I didn't want to ever wear them again. As Jeff got worse, and I got worried I had to go them out of the drawer and put those "BIG GIRL PANTIES" back on, until I get through this ordeal and then i will try to bury them again. Somedays I wish I could just be 8 again and have no worries. I know we will make it through this eventually, but will take some time. We have had excellent doctors, and they have did some miracles with Jeff.
I wish for the best to anyone getting to face this kind of surgery, Life is so difficult sometimes.

Lori aska MOE

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MOE58's picture
Posts: 649
Joined: May 2009

Thanks William for your great advice as always, do I want to sll my shoes HECK NO!! just want someone else to borrow them for awhile. I guess I am just going to put them in a box when this is all over with a note that says "THESE SHOES WAS FOR WALKING WHEN MY HUSBAND HAD CANCER" you noticed everyone I said "HAD" eventually I know we will beup walking and carrying on like we was six months ago, but until then I must keep them around for future use, I don't need a refund on the information you gave me, cause everyday I get advice the better it is for me to learn and listen.

Yes I am standing on top of the mountain waiting to shout louder when we are home from all this mess.

Thanks BILL


magicwolf's picture
Posts: 16
Joined: Jun 2009

Hey girl just in case ya didnt think da old wolf was watching your situation progress I wanted to stop by and say I'm so happy to hear your hubbie is doing so much better. You know you have both been in my thoughts as I go thru my own journey. And your right as a CG myself sometimes we just want to say " Wait I need just a minute to collect myself and then we can carry on" Sadly sometimes thats just not possible. Your husband is a very lucky man to have you in his life and you've been a good woman to stay by his side. Know that I'm very proud of you and am so happy for the two of you! Dont sell them shoes keep them because they will keep you grounded as you go down the path of life. We can never forget how precious the gift of life is and how easy it is to take that for granted. Talk to you soon doll!

Wayne (aka Magic)

mumphy's picture
Posts: 486
Joined: Jun 2009

Hi Lori,

I told you I hope to need those shoes soon. AL started his new round of chemo yesterday.
2 weeks on 1 week off for the next month & the hopefully PET scan and the O.K for Dr. Luketich to do surgery so I need those shoes to keep me as strong as the kept you!!

Glad to hear that Jeff is doing so well walking and everything! Your spirits are good and you are certainly right about the whole caregiver part, that is why I value this site It keeps me going when I can't go any more. Right now I'm so tired because I kept getting up every 2 hours or so just to check to see if Al was breathing since he had that reaction last time he had chemo.

I think I'going to take a nap now while he is asleep. I am so happy for you and I know things will keep getting better and better.



MOE58's picture
Posts: 649
Joined: May 2009


GOD BLESS, I will loan you my shoes, but our friend "MAGIC" AND WILLIAM, told me not to sell them, to keep them around so I can have them to refer back too. Yes I wore them just to keep me strong, but some days I wondered if I was strong enough to wear them, some days were harder to get through then others, but I made it we are on the top of the hill, and slowly going down, yes being a caregiver is hard but somehow we make it through. I know what you mean when you say you are up every 2 hours, i too am up alot with him I feel like i am too up every night about every 2 hours like a baby on a bottle. Thats okay though I will take it.

Well I am glad that you have your OWN BIG GIRL PANTIES, and wearing them well, you will need them if you go through my situation. Glad you like that saying. Pleaes keep me posted on jim situation i will be waiting

Take Care
Lori aka MOE

kitten0385's picture
Posts: 278
Joined: Apr 2009


I just wanted to tell you again that I am so happy for you and Jeff. It's so wonderful that he is doing so well, I knew he's pull through like a champ!! While I had a great vacation, i was looking forward to knowing Jeff's progress, and was very happy to come home to such wonderful news!! So great!!