venting

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prv
prv Member Posts: 107
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I was telling a friend/colleague that I had bc yesterday and had a strange sensation that the world is split into two groups of people: those that have cancer and those that don't. I don't understand what God is trying to teach me/us by making me/us go through this. I don't know why this happened or what I could have done to prevent it. Did I eat too many foods with preservatives? Does the non-cancer group of people understand how lucky they are. Will I start to feel lucky and grateful for what I do have again? thanks for listening.

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  • zahalene
    zahalene Member Posts: 670
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    All good questions
    And most (if not all) cancer survivors ask them at some point. I know I surely did...over and over. Did I ever get all the answers? No. But I did eventually find some peace about some of the questions as well as a 'comfortable' place to hold the others until I can ask my Maker face to face what he had in mind.
    For instance, if medical research can not yet explain what causes cancer and who gets it and who doesn't, then I am not going to expend my limited energy trying to solve that one.
    And, do people who don't have cancer know how lucky they are? Did I know that before I got cancer? No. But I eventually realized how blessed I am to be alive in spite of it. So, maybe that was one lesson learned.
    And, yes, you will start feeling lucky for what you do have again. But it will take time and work and maybe meds to help with depression or whatever.
    I am a 23+ year cancer survivor. There is life after cancer and it is good. But there is also good life IN cancer. We just have to look harder to find it.
    God bless.
  • CR1954
    CR1954 Member Posts: 1,390 Member
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    zahalene said:

    All good questions
    And most (if not all) cancer survivors ask them at some point. I know I surely did...over and over. Did I ever get all the answers? No. But I did eventually find some peace about some of the questions as well as a 'comfortable' place to hold the others until I can ask my Maker face to face what he had in mind.
    For instance, if medical research can not yet explain what causes cancer and who gets it and who doesn't, then I am not going to expend my limited energy trying to solve that one.
    And, do people who don't have cancer know how lucky they are? Did I know that before I got cancer? No. But I eventually realized how blessed I am to be alive in spite of it. So, maybe that was one lesson learned.
    And, yes, you will start feeling lucky for what you do have again. But it will take time and work and maybe meds to help with depression or whatever.
    I am a 23+ year cancer survivor. There is life after cancer and it is good. But there is also good life IN cancer. We just have to look harder to find it.
    God bless.

    Oh!
    Beautifully said, Zah!

    CR
  • lynn1950
    lynn1950 Member Posts: 2,570
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    zahalene said:

    All good questions
    And most (if not all) cancer survivors ask them at some point. I know I surely did...over and over. Did I ever get all the answers? No. But I did eventually find some peace about some of the questions as well as a 'comfortable' place to hold the others until I can ask my Maker face to face what he had in mind.
    For instance, if medical research can not yet explain what causes cancer and who gets it and who doesn't, then I am not going to expend my limited energy trying to solve that one.
    And, do people who don't have cancer know how lucky they are? Did I know that before I got cancer? No. But I eventually realized how blessed I am to be alive in spite of it. So, maybe that was one lesson learned.
    And, yes, you will start feeling lucky for what you do have again. But it will take time and work and maybe meds to help with depression or whatever.
    I am a 23+ year cancer survivor. There is life after cancer and it is good. But there is also good life IN cancer. We just have to look harder to find it.
    God bless.

    Thinking the same thing
    Well said, Z. It's taken me 11 months to get my brain rearranged, so I am a slow learner. The pain and suffering have changed me in good ways. I would never wish them on ANYONE, but there are some perks (including curly hair for some of us :) ) on this journey. xoxox Lynn
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
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    zahalene said:

    All good questions
    And most (if not all) cancer survivors ask them at some point. I know I surely did...over and over. Did I ever get all the answers? No. But I did eventually find some peace about some of the questions as well as a 'comfortable' place to hold the others until I can ask my Maker face to face what he had in mind.
    For instance, if medical research can not yet explain what causes cancer and who gets it and who doesn't, then I am not going to expend my limited energy trying to solve that one.
    And, do people who don't have cancer know how lucky they are? Did I know that before I got cancer? No. But I eventually realized how blessed I am to be alive in spite of it. So, maybe that was one lesson learned.
    And, yes, you will start feeling lucky for what you do have again. But it will take time and work and maybe meds to help with depression or whatever.
    I am a 23+ year cancer survivor. There is life after cancer and it is good. But there is also good life IN cancer. We just have to look harder to find it.
    God bless.

    I do like what you said too
    I do like what you said too Zahlene! But, I hope also that someday I realize or find out why it did happen to me.
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
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    I don't think anyone knows
    I don't think anyone knows how lucky they are to not have bc. I think you only realize how lucky you were before, after you get the diagnosis. It does change everything!
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
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    zahalene said:

    All good questions
    And most (if not all) cancer survivors ask them at some point. I know I surely did...over and over. Did I ever get all the answers? No. But I did eventually find some peace about some of the questions as well as a 'comfortable' place to hold the others until I can ask my Maker face to face what he had in mind.
    For instance, if medical research can not yet explain what causes cancer and who gets it and who doesn't, then I am not going to expend my limited energy trying to solve that one.
    And, do people who don't have cancer know how lucky they are? Did I know that before I got cancer? No. But I eventually realized how blessed I am to be alive in spite of it. So, maybe that was one lesson learned.
    And, yes, you will start feeling lucky for what you do have again. But it will take time and work and maybe meds to help with depression or whatever.
    I am a 23+ year cancer survivor. There is life after cancer and it is good. But there is also good life IN cancer. We just have to look harder to find it.
    God bless.

    Zahlene, you always say the
    Zahlene, you always say the perfect thing! There is nothing I can add!
  • Noel
    Noel Member Posts: 3,095 Member
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    susie09 said:

    I don't think anyone knows
    I don't think anyone knows how lucky they are to not have bc. I think you only realize how lucky you were before, after you get the diagnosis. It does change everything!

    You just vent all you want.
    You just vent all you want. The rest of us do!
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
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    We didn't cause our own cancer!!!!
    I personally don't think God is trying to teach any of us anything with a Life-threatening illness. I do know my Bible, though I do not make a habit of quoting from it often, out of respect not just for myself, but for others as well. But sometimes, I just have to! To paraphrase, the Bible says that "with evil God cannot be tried, nor does He try anyone else"... And if Cancer isn't an Evil which is trying us, I don't know what is!!! I am not a church-goer, or even one who prays,( for reasons of my own) but if one wants to bring God's into the equasion, I draw the line at Him putting anyone through this! He just wouldn't!

    Do we want to learn Patience? Long-suffering? Time-management? Appreciation? Accomplishment? Do a 10,000 piece puzzle of popcorn being eaten by Polar Bears in a snow storm or something!!! That will build all of those things~ without surgery, meds, or the need to go to the hospital! :-)

    I have long stopped wondering why I got BC, or why anyone gets any disease~be it MS, Parkinson's, diabetes, Lupus, or anything! It is sadly, it seems to me, part and parcel of Life As We Know It. And for those who seem to fly through life unscathed? We know they are also plagued with the unseen things; depression, infidelity, drug addiction, abuse, etc etc etc. If it isn't happening to us personally, we all know someone battling something. Along with the fellow-feeling, it , if we allow it to, draws us in closer to people everywhere...we are just human, no one better than the other.

    I don't have the solution for anything at all, of course! I muddle along, doing the best I can, and just know that even if my friends DON'T have cancer~ they have something else.

    Sorry to have rambled here, I think I may have had too much coffee this morning!

    Hugs,
    Claudia
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
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    I certainly don't have all the answers to all your questions...
    As usual, zahalene's post sums it all up with eloquent clarity, compassion, and the wisdom that can only come from experience. (Thank you, zah.)

    However, the one point I can and will address directly: you most certainly did NOT "do" anything to create your own breast cancer. None of us did/do. Therefore, it could not have been "prevented"... As I was assured by my own doctor very shortly after diagnosis, while asking your same questions.

    And for the concept of the "Haves/Have Nots" - yes, definitely. Of course, we continue to love our family and friends - the Have Nots. We are all here - on this ACS site, within the CSN on the BC Board - to gather and communicate amongst others like ourselves, the Haves. The journey unites us in ways that those not traveling it simply cannot truly understand. No matter how hard they may try.
  • prv
    prv Member Posts: 107
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    I certainly don't have all the answers to all your questions...
    As usual, zahalene's post sums it all up with eloquent clarity, compassion, and the wisdom that can only come from experience. (Thank you, zah.)

    However, the one point I can and will address directly: you most certainly did NOT "do" anything to create your own breast cancer. None of us did/do. Therefore, it could not have been "prevented"... As I was assured by my own doctor very shortly after diagnosis, while asking your same questions.

    And for the concept of the "Haves/Have Nots" - yes, definitely. Of course, we continue to love our family and friends - the Have Nots. We are all here - on this ACS site, within the CSN on the BC Board - to gather and communicate amongst others like ourselves, the Haves. The journey unites us in ways that those not traveling it simply cannot truly understand. No matter how hard they may try.

    thanks
    thanks, everybody!
    first chemo today! Will kick some butt!
    See you on the other side!
  • chenheart
    chenheart Member Posts: 5,159
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    prv said:

    thanks
    thanks, everybody!
    first chemo today! Will kick some butt!
    See you on the other side!

    Darn Right!!!!
    Darn right you will kick some Cancer butt, indeed! We're with ya, sister! Keep us posted on your progress; we'll be right there with you to answer questions and cheer you on!!

    Hugs,
    Claudia
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
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    prv said:

    thanks
    thanks, everybody!
    first chemo today! Will kick some butt!
    See you on the other side!

    PRV, you go kick cancer's
    PRV, you go kick cancer's butt today! Let us know how you do!
  • Christmas Girl
    Christmas Girl Member Posts: 3,682 Member
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    prv said:

    thanks
    thanks, everybody!
    first chemo today! Will kick some butt!
    See you on the other side!

    Yeah, kick BC butt!
    First chemo = big kick! We'll be here for you, every step of the way. Remember - it's temporary, and doable.

    Best wishes to you.