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Tonsil,Soft Palate, Neck,Tongue, cancers

joolivermesplay
Posts: 21
Joined: Oct 2008

I had wrote before a few times, but have been quite busy dealing with 2 more cancerous areas that my hubby has developed, some of you may remember that he had to have his tongue removed in October 08 and that resulted in a 48 day stay in the hospital with two more surgeries, the last was December 16th 08., In December on his first ck up after surgery he had an area on the right bottom of his mouth that the Dr said needed debried, Well abt a month ago that area started growing and it is cancer again , there is that one there and he has one on the right of his neck , which is probably the same one pushing up and out , I do not understand how in October all margins were clear and PET showed clear and now here it is again , he has been thru hell with this and here he goes again. They have not told me a stage , i have not asked , but I would like to know, but I don't want him to know what he maybe does not want to hear and he is always there ., Has anyone been thru or going thru this for the third time , this makes 7 cancers since October 2004..CAN ANYONE HELP ME WITH ADVICE AND KINDA PREPARE ME OF WHAT IS AHEAD , I AM SCARED SPITLESS...I have been married to him for 35 years , third marriage for both , so do you see why I am having a hard time dealing ..he started Antibody treatment yesterday , 1 treatment every two weeks..Thank You for listening ..Jo

soccerfreaks's picture
soccerfreaks
Posts: 2801
Joined: Sep 2006

Jo:

I do not know exactly what you can expect, but let me give a go at answering a few of your questions. The probable reason they could not detect the latent cancer before now is because it is so darned small (at first) that it is very difficult to detect. When the node was noticed in my lung, it was at first too small, even when they determined it was growing, to be biopsied. THEY HAD TO WAIT FOR IT TO GROW which seemed counter-intuitive to me. And even when they did extract it, at about 4mm, they could determine that it was malignant and squamous cell, but not whether it had migrated from the tongue/neck area or was new (we are hoping for new -- strange the things we hope for with this stuff, huh?).

In my case, the original tongue/neck surgery was followed immediately by chemo and rads, the latter two exclusively to get to any 'strays' missed by the surgery.

I cannot tell you what to expect, jo, but I would advise that regardless of the strength of your husband's personality and will, with seven cancers in the past five years, there is bound to be some weariness about going through it again, literal fatigue both physical and mental, and perhaps the usual negative stuff that comes with therapy, nausea, etc. I would advise that your husband will be most vulnerable to packing it in, simply deciding he's had enough, when he is at these most painful times.

It sounds as though you and I are in agreement that quitting is not yet an option. Therefore, I would require of his doctors a vigorous pain management program at the very least.

Remind him that he has been though too much to let it take him now. He may be just one more hurdle away from being cancer-free.

As always, jo, be sure to take good care of the caregiver too!

Take care and best wishes,

Joe

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