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Lost my mom to ovarian cancer

tala84
Posts: 2
Joined: Apr 2009

Hi all!

I have been thinking about writing a post for a while, but I don't know why I didn't have the courage to do so until today.

I lost my mom to ovarian cancer last august. She is my best friend, rock, and the most amazing woman. I find joy in thinking about her kindness, and the way she loved the world for all it is. Even two months before she died she was watching some show about animals in the Amazon, and couldn't stop gasping at how beautiful our planet was.

I'm 24, and I was 22 when she was first diagnosed. I know she is gone, I'm very aware of it, but this hole in my heart only keeps getting better. I went back to grad school three weeks after she died, haven't missed a deadline since, but I'm so unfathomably sad, and I want her to talk to me or something.

I know all of you out there have been through something similar, and I would appreciate any words of support or advice. I just feel like its never going to get easier, and nothing good will ever happen to me again. I know I need to let myself feel sad, but I'm worried that I'm despairing.

soccerfreaks's picture
soccerfreaks
Posts: 2801
Joined: Sep 2006

Right beneath your post is another of the same nature, with a number of very useful suggestions from others, most of whom have been there. Please read the post and the subsequent comments there and see if they are of any helpful.

Best wishes for a brighter tomorrow!

Take care,

Joe

green50
Posts: 318
Joined: Feb 2008

Yes Tala as Joe said read the other post below yours. I did go thru this with my husband. I still talk to my husband and I can almost hear his response on questions. I smile knowing what he would say. Time will help and I am sure the other posts people had put will too. I know what your are feeling. There will be good and bad days but as time goes on you will have those good memories. My sons were 22 and 26 when their dad passed and we talk about him and have his wonderful memories. I am sorry for you pain it will get easier, I didnt think so but it has.
Prayers and Hugs
Sandy

hunpot's picture
hunpot
Posts: 90
Joined: Nov 2008

Tala I am so sorry i know how you are feeling.
i lost my mom Aug 18 to head neck cancer SCC, I am 36 she was only 58. To lose our mother is the most horrible thing to endure in this life, Moms make our world happy, safe and bring another meaning to the word LOVE. They are our best friends and can never be replaced. I have been having such hard times myself without my best friend, we were so close talked everyday and now i am just so alone without her.

Try to find comfort knowing she is at peace now and she is watching over you, believe me it is hard and i know you want to talk to her i want to talk to mom so baddddd i miss our talks, walks, laughing, shopping togther and her telling me stop yelling at my hubby:) My youngest son cole misses his grammy so much she used to give him littel treats all the time and he misses her banana popsicles its so hard for me when he talks about her and the little things but i try to remind him she is at heaven and she is watching over him to make sure he is safe, your mom is watching you and gonna keep you safe now.

Im sure your mom loved you with all her heart and all she wants is for you to succeed in life and be happy, You were a great daughter to her and i know she is proud of you. I know she is happy that she got to spend quality time with you and that you were there for her when she needed you most. im glad you decided to go back to school its the best thing you could do for HER because she would be so excited for you and i know if she was here she would tell you so. Thats is something good for you to think about.
Evryone tells me in time it gets easier mom even worte me a letter and told me not to be sad for to long and in time it will get easier for me she told me to just continue to be a good wife and good mother to my boys. So i know your mom wants you to finish school so no matter how hard it gets do it for her and when you graduate i bet shell send you a sign form above to show you exactly how proud she is. Im still waiting for my sign to come but thats how i go on everyday thinking that she is going to reach out to me in a dream or send me a sign i just try to take it one day at a time and stay busy but the hole in my heart will never go away just like yours we just have to find ways to ease the pain and loss we are feeling. If only we could bring them back or have them for one more day, but we cannot so we have to remember the good times and go on and try to good for them and ourselves.

your friend
Tracy

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