Today has been a rough day for me. I recently returned to my job only to find myself displaced due to layoffs and people getting moved around from one area to another. I got sent to the main plant which is much harder on me physically. It can also be very stressfull. A lot of the work is a new process and learning it is a daily thing.
I know most of the people there though because a few years back I had worked there. In fact, I had gotten close to one person in particular and even though I returned to the second plant we remained friends. At least, we did until I was dx with cancer. Since that time our friendship has dissolved. She said she just couldn't handle it cause she lost her Mother to cancer. Therefore, even though I reached out to her, my attempts were ignored. I never got a phone call, a card or anything to let me know she was thinking of me. In fact, until I ran into a mutual friend who explained why she was being distant, I wasn't aware of her reason for the lack of contact.
Now I find myself working in the same building as her every day. People have questioned me about why we aren't talking to each other. Perhaps I answered in the wrong way but it's how I feel so I've simply said I got cancer and she couldn't handle it. Now others who have spoke to her about it are talking to me and making me feel like I'm the bad person for not understanding her reasons. Seeing her on a daily basis is very upsetting to me. It still hurts and she is still ignoring me. I don't speak to her cause I am afraid it will only upset me and cause me to cry. Today another person I consider a good friend brought it up once again. Now here I am upset and crying wondering why I seem to be the only one who is hurting here. Doesn't anyone understand how I feel? I needed her to be there for me and she wasn't there. Except for my children and grandchildren, I was alone. There were things I needed that they couldn't give me because they are my children and grandchildren. I just needed someone to help me thru it all. Someone outside of the family that would there to make things a little easier to deal with during that time. Am I wrong to feel the way I do?