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# of affected nodes keeps rising..why?

blackeyedpea
Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2008

A tumor was found in a colonoscopy done after I reported symptoms of blood in stool several times and getting negative seracults each time. It wasn't time for my colonoscopy so the doctor thought it was hemorhoids He did an early colonscopy when the symptoms persisted. After the tumor was found, a Pet scan showed no organs affected but the dr. said one lymph node was involved.
Surgery was done 2/26 and I was told that two lymph nodes were removed and the biopsy would be back in a week. I was released from the hospital 1 week later and the surgeons associate told me that 3 lymph nodes were removed and affected. That was two weeks ago. I went to the oncologist yesterday and he told me 10 nodes were affected. I was stunned and told him about being told it was 3. He said that the report read 10. I called the surgeon this morning and his office person got my chart and read from the lab report that out of 17 nodes removed 12 were affected.
I struggled with my emotions for 3 days after finding the tumor. I came out feeling I had been given the spiritual strength to face this. I felt amazing peace thru everything for the last six weeks until yesterday when in the oncologists office I heard the number of nodes and just went into shock. I have been crying nonstop all day.
My husband will be home from work soon and I hate for him to see me this upset because I know he will be sad too.
Has anyone survived stage 3 with 12 nodes affected? I feel like dead woman walking and I just can't have that attitude for my familiy's sake and for my own health.
! I dont want to be this way. I cant find my center right now.

NWGirl
Posts: 124
Joined: Jan 2008

I know exactly how you feel. I was diagnosed last October with cc and after numerous diagnostic tests, they determined no nodes were affected. At surgery, 27 nodes were removed and 20 were infected. I was devastated. I went to a very dark place where I've never been before and had a hard time pulling myself out of it. But I have (pulled myself out that is). It will take awhile, but you will get past these feelings of darkness and despair. In the meantime, let yourself go through the grieving process or whatever you want to call it. Your life has just been changed forever and it is frightening to say the least. Let yourself feel whatever you need to feel. Know that you will feel better. If you were like me, it was very hard to feel good mentally if you feel bad physically. When I started feeling better physically, it helped my state of mind a lot.

Your doctors will likely put you on a very aggressive chemo and radiation schedule. You didn't mention whether the surgeon got "clean margins" - be sure to ask. This means that the edges of the nodes removed were clean - no disease - i.e. they successfully removed all the evident disease.

Radiation will address the area where the tumor was located - the local area. Chemo will address any microscopic cancer cells that have gone elsewhere but may still be to small to show up in a PET Scan.

I have always thought I was a strong spiritual person, but when I heard my news I felt I had lost all faith in all I believed in. It is four months later now and I'm doing so much better.

I know the rest of my life will be filled with uncertainty - that's just the way it is. But I'm trying to take it one day at a time and do the best I can. Some days are better than others. If I feel really down I take an anxiety pill. I lean on my friends and family when I need to.

So in closing, give yourself time. This is a lot to absorb. And know that you are not alone -I am pretty much in the exact same situation you are. But I have two young children and a husband who love me, so I'm not ready to give up and die just yet. And so far all my tests show NED. I hope my luck holds out and I hope yours does too.

tootsie1's picture
tootsie1
Posts: 5006
Joined: Feb 2008

I'll be praying for strength and healing for you.

Gail

changing
Posts: 135
Joined: Oct 2006

YEP! 16 out of 20 nodes were cancerous, that was 7/06. I'm still here and kickin:) It was a shock for sure and I too thought it was over! I know one thing for sure, I'm not going 1 minute before God calls me home, so my job now is to LIVE! Praying you too will find peace!

valley
Posts: 93
Joined: Jun 2007

Hi

I sure do know how you feel. My husband was diagnosed Jan 06 with stage 3 rectal cancer 10 out of 28 nodes positive. Radiation and chemo, surgery and 4 more months of chemo. They treated him very aggressively. 5fu and oxiplatin. He did great went to work everyday. His surgery also went well was very lucky because his tumor was very low. He had a great surgeon. It's been over 2 years now and he is still doing good. Pet scans every 3 months have all been clear. They now have him on 6 month schedule so his next pet will be in June. A little bit nervous about this.

This is not an easy fight but with a good attitude and strengh from friends and family you will be fine. I will be praying for you. Please keep us posted.

Val

valley
Posts: 93
Joined: Jun 2007

Hi

I sure do know how you feel. My husband was diagnosed Jan 06 with stage 3 rectal cancer 10 out of 28 nodes positive. Radiation and chemo, surgery and 4 more months of chemo. They treated him very aggressively. 5fu and oxiplatin. He did great went to work everyday. His surgery also went well was very lucky because his tumor was very low. He had a great surgeon. It's been over 2 years now and he is still doing good. Pet scans every 3 months have all been clear. They now have him on 6 month schedule so his next pet will be in June. A little bit nervous about this.

This is not an easy fight but with a good attitude and strengh from friends and family you will be fine. I will be praying for you. Please keep us posted.

Val

Viel80
Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2008

Im sure how you are feeling.My husband was diagnost with stage III, cinget cell carcinoma,on 1/08,13 of 14 limp nodes wore effected.He is receving chimo every other week and 5weeks of radio.
Please be strong is really hard for you right now,but have faith in god huny.Take one dau at the time.I was very depressed/crying every day,but i have to be strong for my little 7 monhs old baby boy,and my husband.
I will be praiying for you.
BE STRONG.

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