How to help my family

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4theloveoflife
4theloveoflife Member Posts: 8
edited March 2014 in Ovarian Cancer #1
I am 33 years old found out i had stage IIIc ovarian cancer one year and 3 month ago when thought surgery and had everything removed including lyphnoids (didn't even know i had them untill then). I had only gotten life insurance 3 months before i found out and they dropped me of course and said i could try agian later.

I am so scared that they will not have what they need i tell myself that i don't need to worry but then i come back and say i have to do something.

Also have any of you ever heard of them not doing any treatment but the surgery? My Dr. told me that i was young and the chemo would wear me down and he wanted to see if my body would just keep it way. I couldn't believe it no one else that i talked to could either.

I was doing so good the first year but now i am starting to get depressed and i am not back to normal like the doc said and i am so tierd. Everytime i don't feel good in the back of my mind i think it came back. Does everyone feel this way?

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  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
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    Hello, I just read your question and I must say I am surprised that they could cancel your life insurance like that. I have a small policy on myself that I obtained just prior to getting cancer. Since I already had the policy I have held onto it. I do not know your entire medical story, if there were any lymph nodes that showed as positive or not. It does surprise me that a stage IIIc would not have any additional treatment. Is your doctor seeing you regularly, have you been given an annual MRI or PET scan, is your doctor doing regular blood work to see how your cancer markers are? If this is all foreign to you then I sugguest you contact the local American Cancer Society and ask them for assistance so you can better understand your situation. I hope this is helpful to you. Sending a hug your way! Rena
  • 4theloveoflife
    4theloveoflife Member Posts: 8
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    RE said:

    Hello, I just read your question and I must say I am surprised that they could cancel your life insurance like that. I have a small policy on myself that I obtained just prior to getting cancer. Since I already had the policy I have held onto it. I do not know your entire medical story, if there were any lymph nodes that showed as positive or not. It does surprise me that a stage IIIc would not have any additional treatment. Is your doctor seeing you regularly, have you been given an annual MRI or PET scan, is your doctor doing regular blood work to see how your cancer markers are? If this is all foreign to you then I sugguest you contact the local American Cancer Society and ask them for assistance so you can better understand your situation. I hope this is helpful to you. Sending a hug your way! Rena

    Yes i do have check ups and blood work done every 3 months for a CA-125 but that is the only test i do. i don't think that there were any lymph nodes that it had spread to.
    The insurance gave me back the money i put into it and said that i was still on a probationary period when i found out about the cancer.

    What does the stages mean i thought that it ment how far it had progressed though out my body. is that not right?
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
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    Yes i do have check ups and blood work done every 3 months for a CA-125 but that is the only test i do. i don't think that there were any lymph nodes that it had spread to.
    The insurance gave me back the money i put into it and said that i was still on a probationary period when i found out about the cancer.

    What does the stages mean i thought that it ment how far it had progressed though out my body. is that not right?

    http://www.cancer.org/docroot/CRI/content/CRI_2_4_3X_How_is_ovarian_cancer_staged_33.asp?sitearea=CRI

    Check out the above link, it will spell out the staging for ovarian cancer.
  • aandj
    aandj Member Posts: 33
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    Hi there
    I have to say that this all sounds very strange to me. I was diagnosed 4 months ago with Stage 1c - so allmost the best stage - and the doctors still insisted on giving me chemo after the operation. I definately think you need to get another opinion from another specialist, and you need much more than just a CA125 check up. We all know that the CA125 marker is completely unreliable. My CA125 was negative to start with and I had a tumour the size of both my fists put together!
    I hope this does not scare you, but the best thing you can do is get another opinion, and start asking lots and lots of questions.
    Good luck, Angela
  • mopar
    mopar Member Posts: 1,972 Member
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    I hear so much fear in your words. We've all been there and can relate to your anxiety and concerns. I agree with the other ladies that, No. 1 the insurance company acted irresponsibly by cancelling you. They may have given you the money back (I never heard of a 'probationary period'), but it's like washing their hands of the situation. I know you may not feel like it right now, but I would keep all your information so that someday you can possibly pursue this with an advocate or attorney. No. 2, I would get a second opinion with a gynecologic oncologist. Chemo or some form of treatment is often indiciated, no matter what the stage. And because you are young you would be even better able to handle the chemo than someone who is older. So, that doesn't make sense to me. No. 3, the CA125 can be a very useful tool, as I found out in my situation. But it can't stand alone, and must be done in conjunction with other tests.

    So, regarding getting assistance, second opionions, etc., please think about it and let us know how things turn out for you. In regard to your family, I hope that you are getting the support you need right now. I think you will all be helping eachother. And take some time to read previous discussions on this board. You will see that even Stage III and IV women have been managing the disease. You will see many helpful tips and suggestions. Most importantly, You will find encouragement and hope.

    My prayers and HUGS to you.
    Monika
  • saundra
    saundra Member Posts: 1,370 Member
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    I also never heard of surgery not followed by chemo. Did a gyn/onc do your surgery or just a surgeon? I have stage IV and
    have had 9 big doses of Chemo and now a maintenance dose for 12 months to keep the addidional cells from growing. I think I would go to a major cancer treatment hospital and get a second opinion. I use Sammons in Dallas connected to Baylor Hospital, Texax Oncology. Don't know where you are but you have to be pro-active in this disease. (((HUGS))) Saundra
  • curlyq1971
    curlyq1971 Member Posts: 56
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    I was 34 years old at the time I was dx with Stage 2 Ovarian Cancer which is almost 3 years ago, and I had life insurance and a cancer policy and they never dropped me, I think I would look into that, it sounds like discrimination. Also, I have never heard of just having surgery for treatment with this type of cancer, I had surgery as well and there wasn't any spread to my lymph nodes either and I still had to do 6 chemo treatments, the CA125 is a reliable test for me as I was very sensitvie to it prior to dx my CA125 was 50,500 and now I have been steady at 13 for almost 3 years. I would probably get a second opinion from a gyne/oncologist and see what they think you should do. It is very hard "getting back to normal" and it will take some time, you will never totally not think about a reoccurance but it will get less and less. My advice to you is to not let cancer decide how you are going to live the rest of your life, be thankful for all that you have and live each day to the fullest, don't let the disease have all the power, be proud that you are a survivor and enjoy "LIFE"!!! If you do decide to get another opinion, please let us know.

    Take Care,
    Leslie
  • floridajo
    floridajo Member Posts: 480
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    Hi, and welcome to the group. All I can say is WOW!!! I have never heard either of being a stage 3c and not recieving chemo after the surgery. My Onc does a CT scan at least once a year or sooner depending on what my ca-125 is. If it's ok,then he only does it once a year...once I start to have numbers climbing,or I start to have some symptoms he does one sooner. Are you being seen by a Onc/Gyn??? A regular gyn will not due you as well as a specialist.
    Regarding your insurance I would check it out. There are some good advocates on the lance Armstrong site, that I personally used and they were really good. Go to livestrong.com, and from there you'll be able to find the link for help. i'm also sure this site would have a advocate as well.
    Please go and have a second opinion,particulary since your not feeling well, and are exhausted. Anyway it never hurts to have another opinion. Good luck,keep us posted...(((hugz))~~Joanne
  • floridajo
    floridajo Member Posts: 480
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    Hi, and welcome to the group. All I can say is WOW!!! I have never heard either of being a stage 3c and not recieving chemo after the surgery. My Onc does a CT scan at least once a year or sooner depending on what my ca-125 is. If it's ok,then he only does it once a year...once I start to have numbers climbing,or I start to have some symptoms he does one sooner. Are you being seen by a Onc/Gyn??? A regular gyn will not due you as well as a specialist.
    Regarding your insurance I would check it out. There are some good advocates on the lance Armstrong site, that I personally used and they were really good. Go to livestrong.com, and from there you'll be able to find the link for help. i'm also sure this site would have a advocate as well.
    Please go and have a second opinion,particulary since your not feeling well, and are exhausted. Anyway it never hurts to have another opinion. Good luck,keep us posted...(((hugz))~~Joanne
  • 4theloveoflife
    4theloveoflife Member Posts: 8
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    About the insureance. I had not went through the medical yet. Thanks so much for your help. When I talk to my Dr he siad that he would be suprized of it comes back. At least that is what he said when I was worried about it.

    Referance my medical history I have Asthma but that is all that I had prior to this. I am pretty healthy I am over weight but other then that i was fine.
    I proudly served as in the US Air Force for 6+ years and I complained about the pain for a long time and no one (military dr's or the VA) would listen until they thought i had appendictis. Who knows how long it was there and i WISH i knew. I have tried to get diablity from the military because i think it is from the fuel(benzene) i worked around everyday but i had no luck they said that i found out about it after i was out. I am still fighting and will not give up as this will take care of my Chilren and Husband for a while.

    Thanks so much for your concern and help it makes me feel better to know there are people out there who really care. My Dr doesn't answer and ?'s i have when it comes to how long it has been there or if it could have came from the fuel. He doesn't have much time and they don't call me back when i leave VM's. Hopefully i will get my answers soon. I know there are people he needs to help that have more problems then i do but it makes me feel unimportant to him and his staff.

    So thanks for helping me i feel so much better having someone that can help me out and cares other then my family.
  • Steph65723
    Steph65723 Member Posts: 12
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    About the insureance. I had not went through the medical yet. Thanks so much for your help. When I talk to my Dr he siad that he would be suprized of it comes back. At least that is what he said when I was worried about it.

    Referance my medical history I have Asthma but that is all that I had prior to this. I am pretty healthy I am over weight but other then that i was fine.
    I proudly served as in the US Air Force for 6+ years and I complained about the pain for a long time and no one (military dr's or the VA) would listen until they thought i had appendictis. Who knows how long it was there and i WISH i knew. I have tried to get diablity from the military because i think it is from the fuel(benzene) i worked around everyday but i had no luck they said that i found out about it after i was out. I am still fighting and will not give up as this will take care of my Chilren and Husband for a while.

    Thanks so much for your concern and help it makes me feel better to know there are people out there who really care. My Dr doesn't answer and ?'s i have when it comes to how long it has been there or if it could have came from the fuel. He doesn't have much time and they don't call me back when i leave VM's. Hopefully i will get my answers soon. I know there are people he needs to help that have more problems then i do but it makes me feel unimportant to him and his staff.

    So thanks for helping me i feel so much better having someone that can help me out and cares other then my family.

    Hello and welcome to the family. I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, but I feel it must be said, YOUR DR IS AN IDIOT!!!!!

    I was only stage one when dx with cancer and my doc had me go through 6 treatments of chemo and I was only age 32 when this happened. My doc told me I was young and I'd bounce back and be better for going through the chemo because it was a precautionary measure.

    And again, I'm sorry if this hurts your feelings. But any doc who, especially when it concerns cancer, makes you feel unimportant is not a doc to have. If he treats you like that, then he probably treats all of his patients like that.

    You need a doc who is concerned about YOU. Who will answer your questions. And who will make sure that you have the treatments you need.

    I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, it's just that I truely do care about what happens. Cancer is a serious matter. Not only am I a survivor, but I have lost a grandmother and an aunt to this disease. It is nothing to be messed with. Your husband, your children, and everyone else who loves you deserves to have you for as long as they can. With proper treatment that could be a long time. I beg you to seek a second opinion.

    Steph