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Single father, too scared to leave...

JustinSTBA
Posts: 1
Joined: Mar 2004

Hi all, I'm Justin.

I only wrote on here once a couple of years ago.. I was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer about 4 years ago. At one point I was fine, cancer-free, only to find it had come back about a year later.

Now I have 2 adopted children, and I'm just convinced all of this isn't going to get any better. I don't want to have to leave them.. especially when they came from a home without a parent to begin with.

I'm too exhausted at the moment to even explain everything. It's really taken a toll on me today.

Just looking for some support I guess, from people who may understand.

- Justin

lfondots63's picture
lfondots63
Posts: 823
Joined: Jan 2006

Hi Justin,

I was dx with Stage 3 colon cancer Dec. 19th 2005. My kids were the first thing I thought of when I was dx. I just couldn't leave them alone without a mom so I kind of understand how you feel. I have used this feeling to help me through the bad days of this journey. I told my kids that I will be around to see their kids children and I will do my best to fulfill that promise. On my bad days I make sure I get lots of hugs and cuddling which makes the fight all worthwhile. It sounds like you beat the beast once. Are you still going through treatment for the second occurance? Have you ever talked to them about it? If you want to e-mail me here on this site, just click the envelope under my post. It is always easier to talk to someone who also has kids and is fighting the beast. HUGS and know that the feelings are normal.

Lisa F.

TereB
Posts: 288
Joined: May 2003

Hi Justin,

I am sorry your cancer has come back. It is not good news but do not give up hope.

My kids were 2-1/2 and 4 when I was first diagnosed in 1987 so I sort of understand how you are feeling. I am convinced I survived the surgery because I was so worried about my kids, didn't want to leave them without a mom since I had lost mine when I was a little girl. My cancer has no cure, it is slow growing and I am still battling it.

Having kids that you care about is a good incentive to put up a great fight. My tumor grew back about a year after the surgery and I thought that was it. The determination to be around for my kids gave me the strength to keep fighting.

There are new advances in cancer treatments so do not lose hope. Your feelings are very normal but if you are starting to feel too depressed or worried, get help. Many oncology depts. have social workers that can help.

Do not give up hope.

Hugs and prayers,
Tere

dmcsurvivor
Posts: 2
Joined: Jan 2005

Hello Justin,
I am a fellow survivor - Darlene -
I read your message and so many questions came to my head. Your message is from a couple of weeks ago, how are you doing now?
Darlene

3graces
Posts: 10
Joined: Sep 2006

Hi Justin,
Please dont lose hope in your situation. There are many survivors on this site that were told a very grim prognosis. Pray, meditate, dance to beautiful music, do what you have to do to get your hope back. If you call the canadian cancer society, they can hook you up with a phone buddy, a person who has gone through a similar experience and beat the odds. You can access them through thier website. I understand your fear. I was recently diagnosed with stage IV lung and I'm scared sometimes too. I am trying to "let go and let God". it is getting easier. It will for you too. Keep believing that you have much more time. Visualise yourself whole.
many prayers and healing love
Statia

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