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How Do You Die From Cancer

Posts: 183
Joined: Jul 2005

Hi everyone, I am having these thoughts alot lately because my dad is getting worse. I wonder how the cancer eventually gets you. Does it shut down your organs and thats how you pass. My biggest fear is my dad has a large tumor in his lung. I have this fear he will eventually suffercate as it gets bigger. I want him to be uncouncious when he passes on so he does not know its happening. So does anyone out there have loved ones that had it metasisized in the lung and if so how did your loved one die at the end? Sorry im just so scared right now for him and our family. Mindy

kerry's picture
Posts: 1317
Joined: Jan 2003

Of course you are scared. Talk with your father's doctor about your thoughts, he can best explain. When ever the time comes, your doctor will probably recommend hospice care and they can give you information as well as comfort for you and your dad.

I will hold you in my thoughts and prayers.


ron50's picture
Posts: 1407
Joined: Nov 2001

Hi Mindy,
Don't stress it will be peaceful. A young friend of mine passed away from double lung cancer. He told the doctors that he wanted no pain so as his condition worsened they increased his meds and he passed peacefully and painlessly. You need to talk to your doctors and just make sure that they do what you and your Dad want when the time comes.((((((Mindy))))))my thoughts are with you,Ron.

Kanort's picture
Posts: 1275
Joined: Jan 2004

Hi Mindy,

My aunt recently passed away from lung cancer and Hospice kept her very comfortable. She died peacefully with her family by her side.

I am so sorry that you are facing this difficult time. Please know that we are here for you and your family.



2bhealed's picture
Posts: 2084
Joined: Dec 2001

hi mindy,

My sister died 14 years ago and I'll tell you the end was anything but peaceful I'm glad the others had good experiences but we surely didn't. Eventually she was drugged enough to be "peaceful" but when she was brought in to the hospital it was actually pretty violent.

If you want details you can email me on here. I understand and respect your need to prepare.

peace, emily

KathiM's picture
Posts: 8062
Joined: Aug 2005

Mindy, my aunt passed from lung cancer.
Near the end, they just kept increasing the morphine...
Make sure you ask dad about HIS choice on recessitation, etc...make SURE it is in writing for the 'just in case'. Now, don't freak...I did this when I first found out about my cancer...also named a Medical Power of Attorney (I am not married, otherwise spouse is that) and updated my will. The LAST thing I wanted was to be kept alive artificially...I have a DNR directive with me all the time.
Hugs for being so caring and brave,

scouty's picture
Posts: 1973
Joined: Apr 2004


I am so sorry you are having to go thru this but I think I have recommended you bring in Hospice care before. While it may seem like a pain to make a phone call to people you never met but every single person I know that has been in your shoes regrets not calling them sooner. They can tell you exactly what to expect when, it is their expertise.

Lisa P.

Posts: 719
Joined: Feb 2005

Oh...you are such an angelt o think of these things. No, your dad will not be uncomfortable. My father recently died - two months ago. It was a hard situation as he found out that his gastric cancer had retruned and was terminal. But he was comfortable untilt he end; at that time - and he was quite the cowboy - he was given morphine to be comfortable and died about six hours later. Yes, his organs did give out; but he did not know it. Other than my own experience - with another form of cancer - I can only tell you to ask a lot of questions and to treat yourself and your father well...his and your love will shine through. Take care - Maura

Btrcup's picture
Posts: 287
Joined: Jun 2004

Mindy, Scott's passing was very peaceful. Though he did not have mets to the lungs, he did have a bad infection in his groin area which caused alot of pain. Once he was brought to hospice, they controlled the pain very well. It was very comforting for me to know he was no longer suffering. I kissed him goodnight at 8:20pm when his twin brother came to sit with him. He passed away at 8:40pm watching COPS and ordering pizza with his brother (we like to think he at least heard COPS in the background). I thought it fitting that he and his brother came into the world together and Scott left with his brother at his side.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this too. You will continue to be in my thoughts.


Posts: 32
Joined: Jul 2005

To me the last stage of dieing is harder on the caregiver. The love one is under a lot of sadation and unknowing of whats going on. The caregiver must watch, hold and tell that person howmuch they are loved and will be missed and to go in peace. As for me I hope that was how my husband of 30+ years left. I was holding him and telling him how much I loved him and I was sorry that he had to leave and he just quitely quit breathing. I continued to hold him till someone pulled me away. He died at 6:33 am with just me and his nurse. I did not call anyone to tell them he was dieing then as I did not want anyone else to be with him but me. Selfish but I wanted him to be remembered as the strong in control man he was.

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