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What to expect in end stage Prostate CA

loveyouDad
Posts: 6
Joined: Jun 2005

To anyone with a moment to spare and some comfort to give I write this as a crisis continues to unfold in my life. My father, my hero, aka "superman" just turned 52 and has been battling with protrate CA for over 4 years. The PSA now runs erraticly in the 600-800 range, he is experienceing extreme pelvic girdle pain. I am the oldest of 4 at 19 years old. My world is falling apart around me, so i guess I am looking for some support, someone to share my story with, and some realistic predictions of what the next few months have in store for me and my family.

rogermoore's picture
rogermoore
Posts: 265
Joined: Mar 2002

Good morning Love,

I am so terribly sorry to hear of your Father's condition. I can only imagine your stress in handling the situation. However, I am certain your Father recognizes your dedication and love in doing so.

What are the ages of your siblings? How is your Mom doing and How long has your Father been suffering? I am sure the Doctors are prescribing medication in an effort to keep him comfortable.

I am so glad you discovered this site. Although I am a survivor, I cannot help you in regard of what to expect. There are a lot of care-givers regularly visiting the site, so I am sure you will receive responses.

Meanwhile, feel free to contact me here or at my personal e-mail if you just need someone to talk to.

I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Roger

bitaday
Posts: 36
Joined: Jun 2005

hello realy sorry.My father has metaststic prostate cancer.I asked many doctors about the end....but many of them answered always there is some exception...I'm sure there is is some medication for decreasing pain.you must be strong for your family.No body can predict future....If you check other part of this site there are some people who have same experiance...god bless you and your family...Bita

2ndBase's picture
2ndBase
Posts: 220
Joined: Mar 2004

I am sorry about your dad and can relate as I have a son who just graduated fron high school and I'm very fortunate to have lived to see him graduate. I was given a 50% chance to live 2 years in Nov. 2002 and though I have a lot of pain, life is good and my goal and my son's goal is to see him graduate from college. I lost my job and insurance so doctor visits are only for check up and to procure the good drugs without which I could not imagine having the desire to get out of bed. I'm now 54 and am blessed with an angel, my wife, who gives me much help and love. Her presence in my life makes every day so unbelievably special. Give your father lots of your time and be the man he sees in you, and he will be blessed to have your love. It seems, as you say, that your world is falling apart but life is difficult and going through this will test you and hopefully make you a better person. It has done that for me and I believe for my son and my wife. Predicting what the next few months has in store is not realistic nor helpful. Think about today and don't worry about things you have no control over. Today is all any of us have and we can make it as good or bad as our mind wishes. Let me know if you or your dad would like to talk sometime.

lindatn
Posts: 233
Joined: May 2003

My heart goes out to you and your family at this stressful time. All we can do is love each other to the end. My husband has prostate cancer in remission psa of 60 in 2002, I had bc early that year. In any case we found a book we loved called Love,Medicine and Miracles by Dr Bernie S Siegel MD. My old wise GP sugguesed we read it. It is wonderful. You might even think about alternative medicine. God Bless Linda

russwhot
Posts: 13
Joined: Jun 2004

I went thru end stage uterine cancer with my sister. Basically, she was put on a marphine-on-demand system to alleviate the pain. She kept saying how lucky she was to have her family around her to give her all the loving care she needed. Yes, she died, but she had quality time with her family, and her death was painless. If your father gets to the point where his doctors ask him to make a decision whether to receive more treatment or to go on hospice care, you will be there for him to help him make that decision.
There are better drugs coming down the pipe,
and yes, miracles do happen. I believe there is a loving divine consciousness that is aware of your father's condition and you can never underestimate the power of prayer.I have pc also but homeopathic therapy and radiation has confined it to .6 for the time being. If the cancer gets into your father's spine, it is possible he would lose the use of his legs. If your doctors are avoiding discussing these end-stage issues, you should see that as an indication they do not think he is in that stage yet. Good luck and God bless you and your father.

artguy
Posts: 3
Joined: Jun 2005

i have time , i just signed up yesterday, and i'm not very good at this computer thing, so please bare with me i am so very sorry for your family, and the individual heartache that you are going through. you can share your thoughts with me if you like. i'm going through somewhat the same thing. i really wish i could help answer your questions concerning the future,i've been trying to find the answer to your question myself, and i get the same answer, it's different for everyone. i can say this and honestly mean it i know what you are going, believe me. i will be hear if need need to talk.... anytime hang on

joegaul
Posts: 2
Joined: Jul 2005

GOD BLESS YOU....I DID THE SAME THING WITH MY DAD. I WAS 42 AT THE TIME BUT THAT DIDN'T MAKE IT ANY BETTER. DAD DID OK FOR THE FIRST TWO MONTHS...WE FOUND OUT IN JANUARY OF 98 AND HE PASSED IN MARCH OF 998. THE PAIN WAS THE BIGGEST THING. SEEMED NOTHING THEY GAVE HIM REALLYY DID THE JOB, JUST NUMED IT. I STAYED WITH HIM TILL THE END, BY THE BED, HOLDING HIS HAND. HARDEST THING IN THE WORLD TO DO. BUT AS HE PASSED, I REALIZED THAT IT WAS FOR THE BEST. HE REALLY WENT THROUGHT A LOT OF PAIN IN THE LAST FEW DAYS AND IT WAS A BLESSING FOR ALL OF US. JUST LET HIM KNOW ITS OK TO GO....AND YOU AND THE FAMILY WILL BE OK. TRUST ME....DAD HUNG ON TILL I TOLD HIM THAT ABOUT TWO HOURS BEFOR HE PASSED. HE KNEW THEN IT WAS OK AND I WOULD TAKE CARE OF MOM. YOUR THE OLDEST....AT LEAST YOU HAVE SIBLINGS TO HELP, I HAD NONE BUT IT WAS OK. WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU AS TO HOW THINGS ARE GOING. EMAIL AT HOME IS AS FOLLOWS.....GOD BLESS YOU AND THE FAMILY! CidnyandJoe2@aol.com

deannajw
Posts: 1
Joined: Aug 2005

Dear Angel, Be strong! Love your Daddy as you always have enjoy every moment you have. I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I have just walked in your shoes this past Feb thru April and my father passed April 29th of prostate cancer. This is the 1st time I have reached out to someone and it is so hard the little things, water, napkins his favorite books...do you have a foavorite game I know he feels bad and it will get worse he won't want to eat or drink he will become extremely weak and frail. My father lost an amazing amount of weight in 12 weeks. if you need more info email me. I am here for you I have walked the walk ..........

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