Emotional help

Options
823
823 Member Posts: 2
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
I am 48 years old, diagnosed on Feb 23, 2005 with ductal carcinoma in situ, stage zero...there is no history of breast ca in my family...had a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy on march 9,2005
will have radiation, as a precaution (as per my breast surgeon)for 40 days...cancer was a low grade..here is my question...how do you "get over" having cancer and on with the rest of your life...how do you not think that every ache or pain you have is cancer...I had no clue that I had breast ca... a mammography and a sharp radiologist who spied the small microcalcifications were the only indicators...i want to know how others, in my same situation, were able to not think about cancer on a daily basis..appreciate any advice.

Comments

  • DebRoa
    DebRoa Member Posts: 31
    Options
    Most of us thing about it-daily. The old normal life we had is gone and is replaced by a new 'normal' that now includes cancer. We all are aware of our bodies, take our meds if applicable and really just live our lives. One day at a time to the fullest we can.

    My rule of thumb (and ok'ed by my oncologist) is if I ache a particular ache for over 2 weeks, call. That way I don't call for every minor ache and pain.
    So, how do I live my life? I work harder-not more hours though, I play lots harder-especially with my children-they are still young, and I take time to smell the roses, enjoy the sunshine, the caterpillars, the ladybugs.....

    I hope you find your new normal-you are not the same person you were-but cancer does not need to define you either. Come to CSN chat-we laugh we chat, we cry, we talk cancer-sometimes...but mostly not.

    Sending many hugs your way,

    Deb
  • jili
    jili Member Posts: 1
    Options
    First, I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I know you will get through it. I have also been diagnosed with breast cancer. It's stage 2. I had a partial radical masectomy. I am going thru chemo now. I just lost my hair and it was dramatic since I think thats one of my best features. Im 32 no family history and have always been in good health. I feel that you have to think positive and not let cancer take control of your life. I feel I am taking this well because it's something I have to take care of. It's very easy to get caught up in all the emotional baggage that comes with cancer. Try to meditate and when anyone says anything negative shut them out and focus on the postives. The survival rates are much higher now then before. Good luck.
  • jerlice
    jerlice Member Posts: 6
    Options
    Calcifications were the change in my mammography films, therefore a needle biopsy was done with one particular suspicious area. Turned out to be DCIS, 0-1 stage. Opted for a mastectomy because this breast was always a problem with painful benign cycts, sensitivity, etc. After mastectomy Tamoxifen was suggested as a preventative re the other breast. After reading and researching all the literature and side effects, I decided against it - for me. Would like to know if anyone else turned the drug down. I did not need chemo or radiation. As for emotional help, use every bit of your faith, spiritually, inner strength, don't be afraid to ask for help and most importantly, encourage others with their newly diagnosed cancer feelings....my very best to you.
  • ktinkey
    ktinkey Member Posts: 170
    Options
    Right now I am probably the longest survivor on this site, so I can tell you, it will get better. My mastectomy was 15 years ago. I can only tell you my experience. At first, you do think about every ache and pain and the word, CANCER, rears it's ugly head in your mind. And I agree with Deb, if the pain persists for 2 weeks, then tell the doctor. But each time you get passed that particular ache, the next one gets a little easier. Before long, you will realize you have gone a whole day and not thought about cancer, then a week, then a month, etc. Your life will return to normal if you focus on the positive. Cancer is no fun, but it can teach you many lessons if you allow it to. I know I have changed for the better for having gone through the process. Little things no longer bother me and I really do enjoy the "simple" pleasures. I thank God for each new day and look forward to what He has in store for me. I definitely have more compassion now. You will have good days and not so good days. Don't beat yourself up over the "not so good ones" and just remember, "this too shall pass". Tomorrow is a new day. Dust yourself off and keep moving.

    We are all here to encourage one another and help each one of us get through each phase of our journey. Embrace the journey and before you know it you will be through the tunnel and out in the sunshine once again.

    God Bless,
    Kathy
  • JKAlley
    JKAlley Member Posts: 84
    Options
    ktinkey said:

    Right now I am probably the longest survivor on this site, so I can tell you, it will get better. My mastectomy was 15 years ago. I can only tell you my experience. At first, you do think about every ache and pain and the word, CANCER, rears it's ugly head in your mind. And I agree with Deb, if the pain persists for 2 weeks, then tell the doctor. But each time you get passed that particular ache, the next one gets a little easier. Before long, you will realize you have gone a whole day and not thought about cancer, then a week, then a month, etc. Your life will return to normal if you focus on the positive. Cancer is no fun, but it can teach you many lessons if you allow it to. I know I have changed for the better for having gone through the process. Little things no longer bother me and I really do enjoy the "simple" pleasures. I thank God for each new day and look forward to what He has in store for me. I definitely have more compassion now. You will have good days and not so good days. Don't beat yourself up over the "not so good ones" and just remember, "this too shall pass". Tomorrow is a new day. Dust yourself off and keep moving.

    We are all here to encourage one another and help each one of us get through each phase of our journey. Embrace the journey and before you know it you will be through the tunnel and out in the sunshine once again.

    God Bless,
    Kathy

    Kathy said it so well. You may not believe it now, but there is life after cancer. There does come a day when you don't think about it. Even here, I used to spend hours in the chat room talking. Now I try to read up in here every few weeks, but I just don't have much time any more. I'm 2 yrs out now, and I know it's changed me, but I won't let the beast ruin my life. I too enjoy life more in every way I can. All the things I've always wanted to do but never did, I'm starting to acomplish. It's amazing what you really can do when you want. I don't let things bother me or get me down - at least not for very long :) - and I take in all I can. Yes, cancer is a part of me now, and every new pain brings on a concern. But finding out I have arthritis in my back and thinking that's good news, show's I definately have a new way of looking at things. You learn hair is really not that important, and friends and family mean more than anything. You learn to thank God (either litterally or figurtively whatever you believe) for every day. I know it's hard right now, but try to keep a positive attitude. Laugh when ever possible. Yes, you will get down and have pity parties, and you deserve it, but don't let that beast keep you there. It will get better, and you can be stronger then you were before. Check out the chat room, there's always great people to talk to, and if you have questions or just need to let loose, the ladies here are a great resource. Be strong, you'll make it through. JK
  • SweetSue
    SweetSue Member Posts: 217
    Options
    I am 56 and had bilateral mastectomy (03/19) and chemo. I found that when I stopped talking about cancer, I could get through a day without thinking about it. I just feel like I am fortunate that the cancer was found early enough. I go to bed each night knowing I am safe right NOW and things could be worse. I thank God.
  • SweetSue
    SweetSue Member Posts: 217
    Options
    P.S. that was March 19, 2003